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Write a sketch in which Phoenix Wright has to defend Maggie Simpson against the charge of shooting Mr. Burns with Marge Simpson as the key witness.
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Title: "The Case of the Baby Accused"
[The scene opens in the courtroom. Phoenix Wright, the defense attorney, stands confidently next to his client, Maggie Simpson, who sits in her baby carrier. The judge presides over the case, with Mr. Burns looking rather disgruntled as the prosecutor.]
Phoenix Wright: Your Honor, today we are here to prove that my client, Maggie Simpson, is innocent of the charge of shooting Mr. Burns. I intend to show that there is reasonable doubt in this case.
Judge: Very well, Mr. Wright. Let's proceed with the trial.
[The prosecution calls Marge Simpson to the stand. Marge looks nervous as she takes her place.]
Prosecutor: Mrs. Simpson, can you please tell the court what you witnessed on the night of the shooting?
Marge Simpson: Well, I was at the Kwik-E-Mart buying diapers for Maggie when I heard a gunshot. When I returned home, I found Maggie holding a gun near Mr. Burns.
Prosecutor: And did you see Maggie shoot Mr. Burns?
Marge Simpson: No, but she was the only one in the room with him, and she was holding the gun.
Phoenix Wright: Objection, Your Honor! Circumstantial evidence alone is not enough to convict my client.
Judge: Sustained. Please proceed, Mr. Wright.
Phoenix Wright: Mrs. Simpson, isn't it true that Mr. Burns has many enemies in Springfield?
Marge Simpson: Well, yes, but
Phoenix Wright: And isn't it also true that Maggie is just a baby who wouldn't even know how to fire a gun?
Marge Simpson: Well, yes, but
Phoenix Wright: No further questions, Your Honor.
[Phoenix Wright calls Maggie to the stand. Maggie coos innocently as she is lifted out of her carrier and placed on the witness stand.]
Phoenix Wright: Maggie, can you tell the court what happened that night?
[Maggie babbles and points innocently.]
Phoenix Wright: Your Honor, I'd like to submit into evidence this surveillance footage from the Kwik-E-Mart. It clearly shows a masked figure shooting Mr. Burns and fleeing the scene.
[The courtroom gasps as the footage is played.]
Judge: Order in the court!
Prosecutor: But, Your Honor, how do we know that footage is genuine?
Phoenix Wright: I'm glad you asked, Your Honor. Because the shooter left behind a pacifier with Maggie's initials on it.
[Phoenix presents the pacifier as evidence.]
Judge: This is indeed a compelling piece of evidence.
Prosecutor: But, Your Honor, how do we know Maggie didn't just drop her pacifier?
Phoenix Wright: Because, if I may, Your Honor, Maggie never goes anywhere without her pacifier attached to her. It's a well-known fact in Springfield.
Judge: I see.
[The judge deliberates for a moment before delivering the verdict.]
Judge: In light of the evidence presented, this court finds Maggie Simpson not guilty of the charge of shooting Mr. Burns.
[The courtroom erupts into cheers and applause as Maggie is declared innocent. Phoenix Wright smiles triumphantly, knowing that justice has been served.]
Phoenix Wright: Another case closed!
(That...was not how I expected that to go)
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