Lurker > anttttt

i usually pride myself in playing video games well with my cerebral palsy, but it tends to give me an unhealthy attachment to winning for validation

my internalized ableism is really bad

i used to fight god comps in marvel 2 a lot and stood a good chance

in guilty gear: strive i've peaked in the top 50 in the online leaderboard and am usually in the top 5 of axl players or so, but i don't think that really says much since i just play a lot. it does help my self-esteem that i can get so high with cerebral palsy, at least

R_Jackal posted...

Now, I know there's people way worse than me, but Souls games are not these difficult atrocities that people think they are.

yeah it's weird that people bring up disabilities all the time and act like this series is super difficult. it punishes sloppy play and impatience but defensive play is very strong and it's not very demanding mechanically

i have cerebral palsy so i play with one hand and i think i play pretty well. i usually get to the top of leaderboards in fighting games and even got top scores in other games like sonic mania. accessibility options are great but i think people think that the disabled community wants the entire game to be designed entirely around them, when we aren't very unreasonable and usually just want things like color blind options, subtitles, and button remapping.

seeing all the disabled streamers out there really makes me wish i had the charisma or initiative to do that myself. i love seeing how other disabled people tackle the same challenges in gaming

i'm not trans, but i can relate to the idea of creating an online persona to deal with inner turmoil

i used to lie about myself when i was a kid because i was so lonely and hated myself. once i stopped lying to myself and told the truth about myself i started being a lot happier, even if i did lose some friends in the process. it ended up having a defense mechanism of lying was more stressful than being myself anyways

i love casual rulesets but i'm not the biggest fan of stocks in casual and prefer score-based timed games. might join later but i have things to do

last game of smash factor was hype, even if sonix choked many killing blows and sd'd way too much in that tournament. he's one of the best players in the world but he sd's more than even chokemos

people get mad at sonix even when he plays aggressively so i don't really care. he's usually most passive against gluto (because duh, who wouldn't stall a wario with maxed waft), and tweek (who can be super campy if he needs to)

took them long enough to finally address the obvious sexual tension

season was alright i guess

i wish i had the ambition to make any of my dreams a reality

also i'm hungry

literally my dream job. i wish i could use being a gaymer with cerebral palsy for clout and fame

i have cerebral palsy and play one-handed. i basically always play on the hardest difficulty and there's only been like two games ever that have physically gatekept me and i do pretty reasonably well in competitive fighters and stuff

i can't imagine why gamers would be upset at more people playing their game. while i do find it immensely satisfying to beat fully abled players with my limitations, i am aware that other disabled people are not like me and should deserve the ability to play the game. single-player games in particular have no real reason not to have accessibility options, and it's weird that people whether someone beat a game "properly" and "legitimately"

i have a youtube channel where i vent about personal stuff like ableism and stuff but it's all private