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Topic	Employee gets sucker punched and beat for reportedly saying the N-word at Macy's
MaverickXeo 06/23/20 5:18:43 PM #293:	DepreceV2 posted... OK. Question to the people that are hard against violence. What can a black man do in a non violent way in that situation to have a decent chance of that person not doing it again? Walking away? That reinforces that they can get away with it. Trying to have a conversation with that person? Good luck with that. In that moment, talking about it will get you nowhere. You might have a chance if you talk to them about it a few hours later. Not right then. No, talking to someone (not insulting them back) works. If the black man said something like "Why am I being called that?" it may make the person think - this sort of questioning is also non-confrontational - which is easier for discussion. Using "Why are you calling me that?" is considered more confrontational which may actual stimulate personal offense and the person who stated the slur would get defensive. I am in no way saying that saying the slur is 'right,' but if we want to have a real conversation, this has to happen. I do the same for my clients (most of which are Indigenous). I place the hate, anger, mistrust, etc. on me in my wording - it gets a lot accomplished a lot faster. It almost causes the person who is escalating to realize that they are not much different than the person they are upset with. Basically, be the bigger person - this has no basis on race, culture, history, etc - but basis on humanity itself. --- --- MaverickXeo --- <cite>MaverickXeo posted [p:941143842] in Employee g... [t:78794447]...</cite> <quote>DepreceV2 posted... </cite> <quote>OK. Question to the people that are hard against violence. What can a black man do in a non violent way in that situation to have a decent chance of that person not doing it again? Walking away? That reinforces that they can get away with it. Trying to have a conversation with that person? Good luck with that. In that moment, talking about it will get you nowhere. You might have a chance if you talk to them about it a few hours later. Not right then.</quote> No, talking to someone (not insulting them back) works. If the black man said something like "Why am I being called that?" it may make the person think - this sort of questioning is also non-confrontational - which is easier for discussion. Using "Why are you calling me that?" is considered more confrontational which may actual stimulate personal offense and the person who stated the slur would get defensive. I am in no way saying that saying the slur is 'right,' but if we want to have a real conversation, this has to happen. I do the same for my clients (most of which are Indigenous). I place the hate, anger, mistrust, etc. on me in my wording - it gets a lot accomplished a lot faster. It almost causes the person who is escalating to realize that they are not much different than the person they are upset with. Basically, be the bigger person - this has no basis on race, culture, history, etc - but basis on humanity itself. --- --- MaverickXeo ---</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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