Board 8 > Board 8 Watches and Ranks Satire Films: The Ranking!

(+) Yeah! (+)

It's finally here! Over the course of this past winter, the following 9 B8ers have watched and ranked some of the funniest (or cringiest) satires released over the past 90 years! This is my first time hosting one of these and I'm super excited to be sharing the results with you all. Many of these write-ups are just as funny as the movies they're about. So I won't keep you waiting much longer, but first we have our lovely comedians and the films they're reviewing.

The Comedians
BetrayedTangy
@fortybelowsummer
@GavsEvans123
@Inviso
@Johnbobb
@Mythiot
@plasmabeam
@Pokewars
@PrinceKaro

The List
Duck Soup
Modern Times
Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein
Young Frankenstein
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Monty Pythons The Life of Brian
Airplane!
Stripes
This is Spinal Tap
Beverly Hills Cop
Return of the Living Dead
Spaceballs
National Lampoons Christmas Vacation
The Freshman
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
Office Space
Mystery Men
Galaxy Quest
Zoolander
Not Another Teen Movie
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
Team America: World Police
Thank You For Smoking
Borat
Enchanted
Black Dynamite
The Interview
Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping
Sorry to Bother You
Jojo Rabbit

Here we go!

Total Scores
48
54
69
72
82
91
97
108
119
120
121
122
133
136
145
147
151
158
158
164
170
172
176
179
179
185
195
202
202
230

This was an incredibly close race, and I'm going to borrow Snake's tiebreaker method and subtract the best and worst scores to determine which gets the higher placement.

Apologies for not making this one! I will be rooting for Return of the Living Dead!

Tag

VEGAS ODDS ON #30

+500 Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein
+750 Duck Soup
+750 Modern Times
+750 Mystery Men
+750 Enchanted
+1000 Stripes
+1000 The Freshman
+1000 Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

+200 Any other movie (+2500 if guessed correctly)

Vegaaaaas

Gimme Duck Soup

Bidding on Not Another Teen Movie

+750 for Mystery Men

Bidding on Not Another Teen Movie.

Bidding on The Interview

I'll guess....The Interview

BetrayedTangy posted...

Total Scores

119
120
121
122

We couldn't do this again if we tried.

Aw eff.

I uh have my rankings. I'm guessing it's too late to send them as I totally blanked on sending them Sunday? Totally my fault, and I can just post what I ranked things as we go along then.

Sorry!

I'm still waiting on some write ups, so it wouldn't be too much trouble to add yours. So I'm cool with it as long as there's no objections.

I don't have full write-ups done yet either so if you were waiting for those, it is best not to wait as I'm about 15 short! I just sent over the rankings themselves.

If you want to go through and redo the numbers for everyone, then I promise I would not participate in the Vegas odds or make any in topic comments about movies that haven't dropped yet as I could probably go through and calculate what is where if I really wanted to (I don't). If people would rather have me separate, that's cool and I can just post along with comments as things pop up! Otherwise I appreciate it! Sorry I finished the films on Sunday, meant to go back and do write ups for all the ones I hadn't yet and just didn't have the time and then forgot entirely until like an hour ago.

Oops!

Guessing The Freshman in last.

Holy shit I just realized last place is last place by 28 points. Way to hate the same thing, everyone! It has an average placement of 25.56 which is almost impossibly bad.

plasmabeam posted...

We couldn't do this again if we tried.

Uhh

56
65
73
82
104
105
115
124
134
138
138
139
146
146
160
161
162
163
177
180
185
189
191
193
199
217
231
232
250

I think there are only 29 on that list, so I definitely broke something!

Also I'll be posting number 30 tomorrow evening. So please email me before then if anyone is missing write ups and you want all of them included.

Suprak_the_Stud posted...

I think there are only 29 on that list, so I definitely broke something!

Fixed forgot about one of the ties.

Thrilled Suprak is on board! Brought us up to 10 rankers and created more ties/one-point margins.

I love how tight these rankings are. I flip-flopped my ranks about a thousand times on Sunday and probably caused all sorts of butterfly effects. Hell, we all probably did.

Suprak_the_Stud posted...

If you want to go through and redo the numbers for everyone, then I promise I would not participate in the Vegas odds or make any in topic comments

@Suprak_the_Stud Oh, please participate in Vegas. We want your money! Which reminds me...

ANYONE can participate in the Vegas odds predictions, regardless of whether you submitted a rankings list or not.

I imagine the reason he doesn't want to participate is that it is now plainly obvious to him what the last place movie is (and maybe a few at the top of the list as well).

PrinceKaro posted...

I imagine the reason he doesn't want to participate is that it is now plainly obvious to him what the last place movie is (and maybe a few at the top of the list as well).

Ohhhhh because he's seen the before/after scores. I get it now.

Might be best if Suprak waits until we enter the Top 25 or so before wagering (or whenever he feels that he doesn't have an advantage)

Yeah, without trying I know what the bottom three are. After that its muddy but Im sure I could try to figure it out if I wanted.

I dont want to because half the fun is stressing if your favorites are going to drop next, but I technically do have additional information so Id rather not have people wondering if Im using that or not.

Suprak_the_Stud posted...

Yeah, without trying I know what the bottom three are. After that its muddy but Im sure I could try to figure it out if I wanted.

I dont want to because half the fun is stressing if your favorites are going to drop next, but I technically do have additional information so Id rather not have people wondering if Im using that or not.

Gotcha. Well, whenever you feel there's enough doubt, feel free to join.

Might also be smart if Tangy deletes the original list at this point.

plasmabeam posted...

Might also be smart if Tangy deletes the original list at this point.

Good call, ty

Holy crap, I just realized I did points the opposite way. Oh, well third time's the charm right? I'll have the proper points and first elimination posted here soon. Sorry about the mix up everyone!

so does that mean instead of an overwhelming last place we have an overwhelming first place?

BetrayedTangy posted...

Holy crap, I just realized I did points the opposite way. Oh, well third time's the charm right? I'll have the proper points and first elimination posted here soon. Sorry about the mix up everyone!

Tangy trying to satirize Gauntlet topics. I love it.

PrinceKaro posted...

so does that mean instead of an overwhelming last place we have an overwhelming first place?

Yes

plasmabeam posted...

Tangy trying to satirize Gauntlet topics. I love it.

Haha yeah, gotta stay on brand

Official Scores

60
78
79
93
111
115
117
119
121
125
130
133
147
148
149
150
164
164
171
172
172
176
186
195
205
206
228
237
245
254

There is one less tiebreaker now, but it's related to the missing score on the previous list. I had misread the data while hastily editing it into the post. So that's fixed now as well.

30. Stripes (1981)
Directed by Ivan Reitman
Score: 254

GavsEvans: 16
Mythiot: 22
Suprak: 23
plasma: 24
Poke: 24
Inviso: 27
Karo: 29
fortybelowsummer: 29
Johnbobb: 30
Tangy: 30

GavsEvans
Bill Murray has a really bad day where he loses everything in his life. Luckily, its the 80s and incels havent been invented yet, so he responds in a more constructive manner by joining the army to earn his stripes. See what they did there?

This film isnt terribly original, as the ragtag bunch of misfits struggle through basic training under their hardass drill instructor Hulka. However, what it lacks in originality, it makes up for in charm. Despite Bill being the typical selfish manchild comedy protagonist, hes funny enough to get away with it, and other recruits such as Harold Ramis and John Candy provide the heart.

The third act involving the EM-50 is when the film is at its best. The heavily armed RV converted for military use is the most creative thing here, and the contrast between military and leisure also makes for a funny image. It may not rank alongside the likes of the Delorean, Ecto-1 or KITT as a famous 80s pop culture vehicle, but it deserves to! You can also tell this is an old film because of how much fanservice there is. There are plenty of women in various states of undress throughout, which you may not expect from the subject matter, with the most notable example being the mud wrestling scene. Im not complaining, its simply an observation since you wouldnt see it in a modern film. Finally, the theme tune has been an ear worm since I watched this. Is it sacrilege for me to say I first heard it in an episode of Family Guy, and immediately recognised it when it started playing here?

Plasma
Hey, wanna make a war movie?
Dude, that would be hilarious. Lets do it.
Cool. What should it be about?
I dont know Everything.
But it can only be two hours long.
Thats plenty of time, dude. It can start with these two guys who are bored and they decide to join the army. Then they go to boot camp and meet these girls.
Were putting girls in our war movie?
Yeah, dude. Tons of girls. Naked ones. And they have to mud-wrestle John Candy.
John Candy? Is he our lead actor?
Nah. Make it the guy from Caddyshack.
Chevy Chase?
Nah, the other one.
Michael O'Keefe?
Nah, the other one.
Bill Murray?
Nah, the othoh yeah, him. The guy who nuked the golf course. Dude, hes perfect. He can steal an armored van, blow stuff up, save some POWs, and come home.
Home? Wait, I thought they were in boot camp?
Yeah, but they get promoted and sent to Italy. Or Germany. Or, yknow what, dude? Make it Czechoslovakia.
Why?
I dont know, dude.
But shouldnt there be a reason? Shouldnt we come up with some sort of plot?
Nah.
D

Vis
As I write this write-up, Im trying to remember if Ive seen any other Bill Murray movies before. Groundhog Day is the only one I know that, for sure, Ive seen in its entirety. I know this tangent is just that: a tangent. But the fact of the matter is that Stripes kinda bored me, which is not a great impression for a comedy to leave on a person. I guess Bill Murrays brand of sarcasm and rudeness just didnt appeal to me this time around, largely because it felt like, I dunnohe was a legitimate fuck-up, but kept failing upward in a manner that wasnt particularly amusing or anything like that. The drill sergeant wasnt comically awful enough to root for Bill Murray, the Captain was a bland doofus, and then they randomly blow up a Czech military base to big applause. I get why its SUPPOSED to be funny, but it just wasnt funny for me, and I found myself struggling to pay attention for most of the runtime.

Karo
A bunch of knuckleheads join the army and do dumb shit in what is possibly the most unfunny comedy I have ever had the displeasure of seeing.
Here's a rundown of how things play out. They do basic army stuff. The idiot protagonist mouths off at the sarge and/or commits treason and somehow never faces any serious consequences. They then play the same musical fanfare over and over and over and call it a soundtrack.
The laughs are in very short supply in this two hour long slog, but the cringes just keep on coming. Seriously for fuck's sake having your characters constantly sing at weird times is not funny plz stahp.
And I havent even gotten to the sexism yet. The female soldiers are all portrayed as these bimbos who are done up like some 'G.I. Barbie' dolls and whose sole purpose seems to be waiting around so the boys can fuck them. Jesus Christ.

Fortybelow
Were soldiers, but were American soldiers! Weve been kicking ass for 200 years! Were 10 and 1! I have to admit I dont quite get the love for this movie. I know youre required to suspend disbelief for an 80s screwball comedy, but theres just too much ridiculous stupid stuff that happens here that I couldnt get over. Harold Ramis joining the army for no real reason, the relationships with the MPs, the rag tag group of soldiers being chosen for an all-important mission, etc. Its full of formulaic youre-in-the-army-now hijinks that didnt offer a lot of laughs for me. Also, Im not a big in your face Me Too movement guy or anything, but all the objectifying of women felt pretty weird. However, I do love Bill Murray and although I dont know that hes in his prime here yet, hes at his dry, deadpan, sardonic best. He and the other stars are good, just not enough to save Stripes from dwelling near the bottom of my rankings.

John
Bill Murray definitely has his moments here but this type of pervy, vaguely sexist early 80s comedy just really rarely clicks with me. It started pretty strong, with Murray's down-on-his-luck loser character establishing a certain vibe early on, where things were hopeless to the point of being goofy, but the typical zero-to-hero military story coupled with a pretty flat romance just left it as not my type of movie.

Tangy
Blegh. I really wanted this one to be good. Ive always been a fan of Murray and upon noticing Ramis and Reitman were attached to this I was hoping it would reach the same heights as Ghostbusters, Groundhog Day, Caddyshack , etc. It wasnt even close.

I think my chief problem is the lack of characterization. Id say Sgt. Hulka is the only one with a distinct personality and even then hes just a watered down R. Lee Ermey. Every other character exists solely to serve Murrays character. This resulted in him being super unlikable throughout and made the movie an absolute dread to get through.

Then on top of that youve got all the sexism. I can tolerate movies having out of date humor pretty easily, but it was pretty egregious here and frankly was a missed opportunity for some satire. I guess they thought a mud wrestling scene was more important. Oh well, at least the MPs were significantly more competent than Murray here, even if they only actual role was as love interests.

Biggest Laugh: Ziskey Rates the Russians: Theyre Pussies!

I literally just sent my write-up for Stripes in, lol. Here's what I wrote:

It goes on for too long, the humor can be dated, and the finale where the recruits face actual military conflict is a mess, but I found this film about Bill Murray and Harold Ramis slackers trying to make it in the army pretty amusing. Lots of great line readings courtesy of the great Bill Murray and you cant help but root for the scrappy privates as they overcome of the disrespect of their commanders and become semi-disciplined soldiers. Not sure Id call it a satire though, since it doesnt really subvert the image of the military, MASH or even Full Metal Jacket might have been a better choice.

In hindsight, I think I overranked it by a couple points, not that it would change anything.

Outlier Ranking

Gavs: 14
Mythiot: 8
Suprak: 7
plasma: 6
Poke: 6
Inviso: 3
Karo: 3
fortybelowsummer: 3
Johnbobb: 0
Tangy: 0

THE HOUSE WINS, BABY!! Bettors get mud-wrestled from the start as Stripes goes off the board.

VEGAS ODDS ON #29:

+500 Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein
+500 Mystery Men
+750 Duck Soup
+750 Modern Times
+750 The Freshman
+1000 Enchanted
+1000 Not Another Teen Movie
+1250 Black Dynamite
+1250 Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

+200 Any other movie (+2500 if guessed correctly)

Leaderboard:

The House Won On:

• Stripes (+1000 odds)

BetrayedTangy posted...

Karo
A bunch of knuckleheads join the army and do dumb shit in what is possibly the most unfunny comedy I have ever had the displeasure of seeing.
Here's a rundown of how things play out. They do basic army stuff. The idiot protagonist mouths off at the sarge and/or commits treason and somehow never faces any serious consequences. They then play the same musical fanfare over and over and over and call it a soundtrack.
The laughs are in very short supply in this two hour long slog, but the cringes just keep on coming. Seriously for fuck's sake having your characters constantly sing at weird times is not funny plz stahp.

Yep, Karo, you nailed it here. Comedy or not, you need consequences, or at least some sort of payoff. Murray getting away with everything isn't funny.

Wow. I thought the cast alone would have kept Stripes out of last place. That's one of the 9 here I haven't seen though, so good for me I guess.

Still betting with Freshman until it's gone.

Had Stripes 20/27, but it's not fresh in memory and reading the write-ups... yeah, it's not as much a buddy comedy as I remember. Harold Ramis was great, and seeing a bunch of SCTV actors is fun, and the RV stuff makes no sense but is the best part of the movie. Bill Murray is definitely grating, just from remembering him as a cabbie at the beginning. I'd probably rank it lower had I watched it. ...There really was no plot, was there.

Estimated rank: 25/30.

Part of me wants to suggest a Bill Murray gauntlet, but I don't think there's enough variety to justify getting more people to watch St. Vincent.

Not Another Teen Movie

Gonna stick with my prediction of Not Another Teen Movie.

Glad to see I was wrong in thinking Stripes was generally liked.

Looks like Karo and I should be at 1 for outlier also

Guess I'll have to do some snap write-ups for the time being (argh, this week so booked) but yeah. A disappointing film considering a solid cast of Bill Murray, Harold Ramis and John Candy. Wanted to like it based on that but it fell flat.

This is one I had a write-up for!

Stripes: D+

This one was actually a rewatch for me. I remember scanning the list, taking note of what I had already seen and then getting to Stripes and I was like "I watched that one!" and then sitting there trying to remember a single thing about it and failing. I watched it again less than a week ago and I'm in exactly the same spot. Of all the movies on the list, this is the one I remember zoning out for a solid five minutes for and realizing I wasn't watching the movie. I wasn't even doing anything. I wasn't on my phone and I was watching this by myself, in my room, at like 1 in the morning. There were no distractions and still my brain was like "alright man you stay here, I'm heading out."

This is the third movie now on the list where I was like "oh WOW look at that cast" and then finished watching it and was like "oh man, that poor cast." This movie has no reason being and bland as it was with a cast like this. It was like an all star group of the 80s comic actors and this was the result. It would be like if the Dream Team assembled in the 90s and then went to the Olympics just had a sensible dinner before heading home. They wasted John Candy. This might be the worst I've seen Harold Ramis. And I'm afraid I hate Bill Murray now.

Also, I've written this like ten times now for different movies, but man did this not age well. But this was somehow worse. It felt like someone's secondary goal was to make a movie and their primary goal was to make sure women knew he hated them, and he wasn't all that concerned with that first part. And, to steal and adapt a line from Community, "I can excuse sexism but I draw the line at being unfunny." For all of my complaints, this was a comedy that just wasn't all that funny. It wasn't the worse film on the list, but it is definitely up there for most forgettable. I think. I'm honestly not sure anymore.

Also, good news everyone! I legitimately have no clue what is supposed to be what thanks to the mix up in tabulating! Stripes was not one of the bottom three or one I thought was near the top, so uh, looks like I get to have gambling as well!

Bet on: Never Stop Never Stopping

I look forward to reading this list. Ive always had decent memories of Stripes but I think with a lot of old comedies I just remember the parts I like and just ignore the romance/sex parts?

Or maybe I just like doing an impression of Arrrrrrmy training sir

Suprak_the_Stud posted...

This is the third movie now on the list where I was like "oh WOW look at that cast" and then finished watching it and was like "oh man, that poor cast."

They wasted John Candy. This might be the worst I've seen Harold Ramis. And I'm afraid I hate Bill Murray now.

Also, I've written this like ten times now for different movies, but man did this not age well. But this was somehow worse. It felt like someone's secondary goal was to make a movie and their primary goal was to make sure women knew he hated them, and he wasn't all that concerned with that first part.

Hahaha! I missed these types of writeups during the Organized Crime Gauntlet. It's good to have you back.

jcgamer107 posted...

Wow. I thought the cast alone would have kept Stripes out of last place. That's one of the 9 here I haven't seen though, so good for me I guess.

Definitely a "How the hell did you screw this up?" type of movie. It's like having a losing season with Jordan, Magic, and Bird on your team.