What's your opinion of private investigators

Well?

Sleazy bottom-feeders mostly. A lot of times they're hired to prove a spouse is cheating or some other nonsense.

The name is Lawrence Palisey (pronounced Pailsey), Private Investigator. I make my living taking pictures of cars that park in handicap spots and mailing them to the ticket enforcers... not a lot of money in "parking belligerence", but I get by. I'm about to try new angle today. I turn off my computer, lamenting that my wife's online status is now 'single'... only 3 months after changing it to 'complicated'... ugh, I'm not in the mood for this.

Not much for real detective work these days. Despite police trust being at an all time low, no one actually cares if their problems get solved. Today I'm working on a plan to get permission to photograph on college campuses to capitalize on trending sexual assault cases. My friend in the department says these cases are almost never investigated on principal - "kids being kids" and all that.

I step off the curb, drinking from a hot thermos of coffee when I'm hit by a car...

I believe they exist

They fucking ruined my life, wtf, told people my deepest darkest secrets. But it's not all bad, i learned from the experience, but still I know they will burn in hell.

minervo posted...

They fucking ruined my life, wtf, told people my deepest darkest secrets. But it's not all bad, i learned from the experience, but still I know they will burn in hell.

You and @Troll_Police_ would probably hate each other.

I like investigating privates

Ferarri619 posted...

minervo posted...

They fucking ruined my life, wtf, told people my deepest darkest secrets. But it's not all bad, i learned from the experience, but still I know they will burn in hell.

You and @Troll_Police_ would probably hate each other.

Why?

In media, one of the coolest professions. Of course, that's all romanticized. I've never really thought about them in real life.

minervo posted...

Why?

Because he actually is a private investigator.

Magnum PI is awesome.

you all seem to have some wrong ideas of what a PI does, so let me clear up a few misconceptions

1. The vast majority of my time is spent serving papers, or contracting it out to process servers.
(before any of you cry about it, i hope you understand what the alternative to due process is)

2. investigating infidelity is extremely rare, and its not exactly something i relish. people only come to a PI about this sort of shit when they are convinced its happening, and they are usually right. nobody WANTS to be the one to break the news that ends a marriage, but i maintain the belief that a spouse has the right to know.im just here to collect my paycheck and make sure things dont get out of hand in the heat of the moment.

3. there is a massive difference between a PI and a bounty hunter. im not out here tasing people or pepper spraying them or doing anything even approaching arresting them

4. if you are doing it where i can observe you, you are doing it where anyone can observe you. youd better be glad im the one catching it, because unlike your spouse/friend/family/whomever, im not going to fly into a rage and shoot you full of holes. i will always do my best to make sure the matter is resolved in a legal and peaceful manner.

5. yes, i totally make a living off of other people fucking up their lives by making terrible choices. call it what you will. i call it job security, since you can always count on people fucking up.

They're dicks.

Keep you hands off my privates, investigator!

Never really thought about it as they don't exist where I live.

Can I hear some reasons as to why people don't like them?

I like the idea that they're there. It can be useful if you suspect foul play in your personal life

PIs are okay but I dislike lazy skip-tracers. I used to have dozens of messages on my answering machine daily, none of them for me, probably because I had one of the few listed numbers in this apartment complex. Mostly calls for people who had moved out before I was ever here. I recognized a few names of neighbors and ex-neighbors. I finally cancelled phone service as it made having a landline phone totally worthless.

Smarkil posted...

I believe they exist

I have a friend who's a PI, and he's pretty cool.

It's a good thing that they exist, just in case.

I prefer the wizard variety.

Phillip Marlowe

The few I've worked with or spoken to seem to be like everybody else I've ever met in my life.