GanglyKhan posted...
Touche
More than just "touche," you've actually highlighted my point pretty well: While it's not strictly correct to frame it as "choosing to feel" emotions (that's not how emotions work), the blame for feeling a certain way about a passive observation still lies within you. It's distinct from feeling hurt by somebody doing something to hurt you, or feeling happy because somebody's done something to please you. This is a case where the event/action/whatever exists entirely independently of you, and you're forming an opinion on it and feeling an emotion according to that opinion.
"Cringe" is sometimes framed as "second-hand embarrassment," but second-hand embarrassment is a form of empathy: you feel embarrassed for the person as a way of relating to them and sharing in their experience. Whether or not you ever actually interact with the person, this satisfies our innate drive to relate ourselves to other people. "Cringe," on the other hand, is feeling the embarrassment that you think another person
should
be feeling, ignoring how they actually feel. It's not sharing anything with them, it's just imposing your own expectations and insecurities on them.