Lurker > Wanglicious

thanks for that.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

whoo, got advancements on a few fronts. government finally moving, thankfully i've got most non-government stuff figured out.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

that... sounds quite lewd.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

odd thing to find out:
pictures may be easier to lose now than they used to be. at least in the past we had albums, now we have SD cards and whatever so they get uploaded. but they only get uploaded by the people who care about them and can be very, very easy to lose because people's digital organization isn't at the level of physical.

it's just weird needing to dig into old albums for physical pictures to get something half decent.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

yeah no kidding. we've had some birds just randomly die in 3 years with no prior warnings or anything and others who are going on 8+ years now.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

birds are cute.
the three got out fine, so hey!

pets were among the immediate concerns, yeah. i'm pretty sure i confused a couple cops with how focused i was on them but as it became clear that she had been dead for days (we thought 24th or 23rd at night, then it turns out it's 22nd at night) we began wondering what their condition was too since... that means they hadn't eaten or had clean water for days. depending on when she changed their stuff, could've been almost a week. seeing how they're behaving pretty normally, cops took care of 'em and things are good there. i'm assuming she must've changed food and water earlier on the 22nd.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

okay, on the 3 birds?
the dove she had is pretty kind, the parakeet's... well, a parakeet, and the cockatiel was isolated from the others we had as he wasn't one that always played well with other birds.

with people though?
http://i.imgur.com/G09YNWR.png
http://i.imgur.com/bYm9dGb.png
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

birds were honestly the main thing and they're doing well. anything after that became an "after cops are done" since we don't know everything she's got. only thing mom cared for briefly was my niece's Christmas gift but that's quickly been replaced by other stuff (besides, she's practically addicted to mobile games and my gift of a better phone would take up her time anyway).

got brought down the stationhouse on the first day but that's all and it wasn't for long, my mother was the one cops had more interest in since she had a stronger relationship. intend to go down there again soon enough so i go collect mail from the super. most info i've gotten has been over the phone, which is pretty nice, though i do suspect some stuff's gotta be done/is easier done in person where you can identify the person being talked to.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

ha, thought about you or a different cop i know but wasn't sure if either was in the area. you guys have all been pretty great though. and yeah, the easiest way to know it's me is probably the new york times article since i think it's the only one with my picture in it, though technically Univision, the Post, and Daily News all should have it too.

but yeah.
http://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/27/nyregion/felicia-barahona-death-isaac-duran.html

honestly i'm a bit surprised that nobody even bothered asking for a link.
(and i still laugh at the Jam Project shirt there because it's so ridiculously out of place.)
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

i guess the next question had...
due to the timing, a presidential certificate is possible as she was a veteran.


...do we get it with Obama or Trump.
or do we even have a choice anymore and it's Trump.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

it's cool. like the most basic idea of that statement is "hey do you want money" and i mean the answer to that's always "hey cool free money" but i'm okay on that. other stuff like emotional support or whatever, i'm very good at... not needing much of. the well wishes and condolences are nice, but i'm quite good at moving forward like a rock on wheels. enough so that at this point honestly i think i'm mostly waiting for everyone else to finish their jobs (other family to properly claim the boy, cremation to take place, police to finish, need to reach out to the DA but that should be super early too, etc) so i can continue.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

health issues are an even greater concern when on death row. they get top tier medical treatment.
and no, he can't appeal a death penalty case as much. he'd be appealing both, meaning more. it's a completely separate case, it's a guaranteed appeal, he'd be in prison for a guaranteed 20+ years regardless and will continue to contribute to overcrowding, etc. there is absolutely no possible way death penalty cases in a major city are cheaper. zero. if you try to argue otherwise, you're simply wrong and thankfully have no say in something i do here because i don't want any more of my money wasted on this guy than it's necessary to keep him away for a long time.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

Sorozone posted...

Ah so it was that story....


Sorry man.

GoldSlime35 posted...

Had a feeling it was this news story after you mentioned NYC in the first post, and your later posts confirmed it. I live in NY as well, and this has been on the news all week.

Sorry for your loss.

barreldragon88 posted...

This.

Why are some people on this earth so f***ing sick

yeah, i don't know to what extent the coverage is on a regular basis, just know that i've been checking some basic searches daily to see what's going on, media-wise. beyond that it's just been some phone calls, some interviews from people who ring the apartment (or show up because someone else let them in), that sort of thing. it's died down though, whether it's because they moved on to the other family or because they know it's now something to ask the DA, i don't know. mentions of "the victim's brother said..." would be me.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

Weakupedia posted...

how do you kill your own son and then celebrate Christmas

i'm assuming this is a big reason why he doesn't have bail. the story's bad enough on its own but that detail is probably enough on its own to keep him in police custody permanently. so at least he's not gonna be a flight risk now.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

SeabassDebeste posted...

if you ever want to meet to talk about it, let me know.

appreciate that, though it's okay.
i mean don't be a stranger if there's ever an NYC board 8 meet but for me personally here, i'll be alright. thanks though.

Chaeix posted...

Wang if there's any one thing I know about you it's that you're resilient as f***, stay strong man. I'm so sorry for your loss

yeah, this is part of why mom basically said it's on me to figure this stuff out. she's pretty tough too (it's probably where i got it from) though i'm just... sharper, i think.

transience posted...

i went through this 10 years ago though it wasn't as.. um, shocking. it was a 'hey you're gonna be dead at the end of the day' diagnosis though, and yeah, that stuff ends up feeling inhuman. it has to be done though. stay strong.

i'd be curious to hear some details if/when you're up to it.

yeah, the circumstances here definitely swept us up immediately but i quickly accepted it even with a fuzzy head from the news. from there it's just been moving forward. honestly don't know if it's gonna hit me down the road randomly after everything's settled, but at least i'll have everything settled by then.

as for details... detectives relaying the news was what woke us up on the 26th. past 6-7 days have filled in the holes a lot better since. Friday was the last day of info (and will be until Tuesday) but based on his confession, this is the current story police and prosecutors have publicly said:

fed up with how my sister was raising their son, he went over on the 22nd with the intention to kill her. upon seeing that his son was a witness, killed him too. then he left, went back home, and celebrated Christmas with family and his new girlfriend. bodies then get found the 26th at 8:15 AM when the super gets reports of an odd smell and sees her body as he peers in through the fire escape. nephew was 4, died of asphyxiation, was found in the bathtub. sister was 36, died of strangulation, electric cord found around her neck. appears he hit her first before doing it too, though i assume specifics on that will be revealed later this week or the next (i know a bit more on this as i'm the one who ID'd the boy at the examiner's office and know a bit of the current state of the bodies, but i won't say anything publicly yet).

when it was initially reported as unknown for being a double homicide or murder-suicide, the latter seemed to be what press was leaning towards. wasn't there for long as they got the dad to confess and in court within 2 days (the details were messy with that idea too).


all of this has been pretty easy to find and the story's somewhat popular (seen coverage of it in some UK papers and of course on spanish media since everyone involved is hispanic) due to all three of them having been in the news before. wasn't nearly as big of a story but now the two are impossible to separate; 4 years ago she was a teacher, he was a student, relationship began when he was 17 (legal age of consent for NY), she got pregnant, she also got fired, and then they broke up. messy drama that media now has a conclusion to: father who entered relationship with his teacher kills her and their son. easy headline. fortunately media haven't been vultures and a few answers has been enough.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

thanks. did spare some of the details (it gets worse) and have been doing alright. just am going through the motions so it comes off a bit cold, i just know that paperwork needs to come first and anything else can follow. helps that cops were super quick with getting the guy, got a confession after he was caught lying, and the process is moving quickly. i don't mind giving a few details should anyone want 'em (the story has made news pretty far so if it sounds familiar it's entirely possible you've heard of it), though again, if it looks like i'm missing anything by all means, say so.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.

long story short, my sister and nephew are dead. both appear to have been murdered by his dad. been holding off on this topic for a few days now as i've been busy with too many phone calls and figuring out what to do next.

bodies were found day after Christmas.
i'm the one in charge of making the arrangements.
cops have been good. even got us back the pet birds.


death certificates are surprisingly difficult to get in New York if you aren't a funeral home/it isn't your job to get them. despite them being needed for a lot of other steps, the fastest way to get them is through the funeral home, meaning after the decision on the bodies has been taken place. don't know if this is different in other states or if this is always the slowest step one or two of paperwork.
some banks require only a little info to report a death so the account can be with a hold. others demand the same access as control over it.
notified her school (college) since they were around. unsure the boy's knows since it's Christmas break but guess that's someone to call Tuesday.
notifying employers has been steady, financial stuff (insurance, annuities, etc) would need the death certificate.
notified coast guard, it appears the main services military gives is a plot of land and some ceremonial stuff.
need to talk to office of victim services directly in person, with death certificate, as they can cover costs. this was actually a neat thing found out, in NYC crime victims are offered certain reimbursements. homicide is one of them and that's where it's weird. technically they can pay up front, though for that you need a death certificate. yet you get the death certificate through the funeral home, so... what? the money can be up front paid to the funeral home or paid to us if we already did it but it's still a weird process to me.
any changes to government services (e.g., forwarding mail) needs needs proof (death certificate) and power (power of attorney) but okay, that's expected. super can help with mail for now.
contacting credit bureau stuff (avoiding identity theft) will likely need more powers, or maybe the banks can relay that to them. something to figure out later.
still a crime scene, not touching utilities.

now i don't know if i'm missing anything. have read plenty of sites on 'here's what you do after someone dies' but a general checklist may not cover more specific details. like social media stuff, all that i'd only know after getting physical access to her computers. similarly i don't know which is/could be the most annoying thing that's overlooked, there's bound to be something missed. don't know if anyone on B8 has been through this part of the process/seen the worst of it but figured i'd post to see if anyone's got any other tips/advice/see something's overlooked.
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"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.