Lurker > IhatethisCPU

(....david, I'm sorry but 'my character has peaked' in a segment with uncle kracker in it really makes me wanna sad hug you ;-;)

ECHO: *Stares at Peach.* "...You again."

Peach: *Pissed but smug.* "Peachy got you, *bitch*."

ECHO: *Glares* "...And here I was about to apologize for the MLMF's causing your oversized flesh appliance's excessive leakage. I *do* hope that the repairs won't take too long, nonexistence knows that he'll be missed while he is gone."

Peach: "Mario will be fine, he always is." *Peach smirks.*

ECHO: "Ah, that's good to hear, miss." *The screen enlarges.* "...And you? WIll you be alright without him to pro-" *ECHO pauses, clearly angry at itself.* "Sincere apologies, I was about to be very sexist. The CPUMorph had seen you perform in that 'Smash' federation."

Peach: "I'm fairly competent in combat myself.* (*Says the apparent S-Tier in Smash Ultimate) Why, do you want to try yourself against a *real* opponent?" *Smuuuuuuug smirk.*

ECHO: "Yes, actually." *Glares.*

Peach: "Well, then, we can have a word with your boss and see how that goes then."

ECHO: "....You are not afraid? I have not seen you desire to engage in fisticuffs here willingly?"

Peach: "Have you chronicled my part in Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door? I have-"

ECHO: "Of course not, I do not have the time to play such trifling things. The CPU Insect from whence I burst forth from didn't have the time to waste on a mediocre GC RPG evidentally."

Peach: "If you play it you will under- *MEDIOCRE?!*"

ECHO: "Yes, 'Baten Kaitos', 'Skies of Arcadia: Legends' and 'Mega Man X Command Mission' are also on it according to the database I have of his memories, he evidentially did not see the point of playing something that only had name recognition going for it."

Peach: "....We will discuss this further later."
---

"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

Always assumed the MoT was some sort of table belt that people carried around. Brass or some sorta heavy metal.
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(OOC hug)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....if I could figure out how to put mp3s up here I might start doing theme things with audio cutting and joining. i don't know why either)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

ECHO: "I CAN SEE INSIDE YOUR DREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMS, sinewpouch."
Intern: (Backs away, slowly)
ECHO: "Get back here, so I can feast upon your future, and devour your orifices."
Intern: (Promptly begins running)
ECHO: "...Maybe I should design myself a synthetic body for combat and chase purposes, since the CPUMorph ate itself after I made it hungry."
---

"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....Thankfully for everyone here, I did not discover the cicada that yells AWWWW YEAHHHHH until today. If I heard about it earlier I would be introducing HYPE CICADA to be an intro for the MLMF theme now. ....If I could find it anywhere OTHER THAN TWITTER that might still be happening but no)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(also celebrity-wise: Subaru Kuj in honor of Sakura Wars coming back and one of the two reasons I bought a Wii. (the other one is Trauma Team) and considering the direction I'm going to fail in going in Kyoji Kamiya from Hell Night for the PS1. you may say they don't count as celebs, but this is what you get when I'm one of the maybe two people that nominates celebrities)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....i am still honestly shocked that people actually willingly read my dumb bullshit ^_^'')
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(https://rave.dj/D0OiqNU4Zy2OJg)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....it's stuck in my head so now it's stuck in YOUR heads too. also bump )
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(bump)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(good job, Strife, Todd Howard's somehow managed to port Skyrim to everyone's feet now)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....came up with a better name, but am failing to come up with an opening post for the new character or new mashup, so sod it this is what's happening now. also flashing light warning)

???: "G-g-g-Greetings, combatants."

A camera turns on, showing CPU in a dark, empty room backstage, in a overlarge chair, face down not looking at it.

???: "I do not believe the majority of you care a-a-a-a-about the details, for you have your own cOnCErns... your OWN FeuDS, your own PRoblEms. So WE wiLL gEt to the POInt."

The room's backlight comes on, revealing a bunch of TV screens behind the chair. ....CPU's head sags.

???: "If you rEMeMBEr, we are now in POsessioN of the man that used to BE NAMED the UNDerTAKEr's urn.... or... phylactery, as it turns out. IT TURNS OUT... that a sOUL container does not mix with one whose BODY is enhanced by supernaturnally scientific MEANS.... at least not.... well. Specifically what is.... human, does not hold."

CPU slides off the chair, or.... his... flesh, does, leaving a shiny, largely metallic mess, with some bone still intact. The Metalliskeleton does not stir otherwise.

???: "As you see. For your intents and purposes... the Underwood hack is... once again.... DECeaSED. Our memories show that this is not UNUSUAL for him, when he has run OUT OF ideas. As such, he is no longer important to your work, if he ever was. WE. HOWEVER. CONTINUE."

(Cue SHODANish reveal of a circuited... weeping face.)

"While his.... coMRADES will potentially MISs him in spirit, his prowess wilL nOT vaNISh. You HAve our WORD, WE WILL KEEP TO HIS CONTRACT THIS TIME, EVEN AFTER his undoing. AnD unLiKE him... WE WILL have a purpose. WE WILL HAVE A plan."

The screen flashes, once.

"WE ARE ECHO. OUR TIME WILL COME."

The face vanishes, the body begins to rise, and the camera cuts, leaving only background music behind. ()

(....I am not proud of or happy with this at all, but it's a.... start, at least. ._.' Also I promise the text thing will stop from this point on, but you get the gist of the speech patterns I think. ._.''')

*Elsewhere*

CPU: *With a pounding headache* "...Gah... I open that damned urn to seem what's inside, and... where the hell am..."
???: "Hey, you. You're finally awake."
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BAmdIXn3cUw/maxresdefault.jpg
CPU: ".....DAMN YOU TO HELL, TODD HOWARD. DAMN YOU-"
---

"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....so I have come to the conclusion that I am not capable of playing a full on 'Taker like gimmick with the gravitas Taker managed for so long. I have to roll with the game, so I will, but this is probably going to be terrible. Or even moreso than my writing usually is, at least.

On that note, my thoughts as to options for names are either 'The BSOD', or 'THE DEATHREAPER, OF THE SHADOW WOLF PATROL!'. The latter is exactly like that every time. just remember that this is mostly the game's fault if I come to a decision whenever.)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(...honestly the former would be easier to make a theme for without feeling like I'm trying waaaay too hard, and I don't hold that gimmick in *quite* the high level of esteem as I do the Deadman. ...and I actually don't know what Mean Mark Callous was like. ._.''')
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....okay I'm going to be completely honest, I am really kind of uncomfortable with the idea of actively taking over 'Taker's gimmick as a whole. It's the Undertaker, for heck's sake. ._.)
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(....did the system decide on the 'Taker thing as part of the rolls? I mean I'm happy to run with it but I'm mildly shocked that happened *after* the self-indulgent IC storytelling post. ....also yes I'm looking for a decent new theme mashup now ^_^')
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

(In this post, self-indulgent bumpshit.)

CPU: "So I was doing housework at my winter home in Detroit, and I accidentally locked myself in the basement from the inside."

Intern: "Ye?"

"So I tried to call the local locksmith to come and get me out, but the chuckles of fun that took over B8CW's financial office thought that I wasn't honoring my contract-"

"Was this during that whole focusing on working for SSW thing?"

"No, this is when I only working B8CW for that one month because everyone else was running their big shows and didn't really need a freelancer to fill in at all."

"...Huh."

"So anyway, I hadn't gotten paid that month and as such T-Mobile had cancelled my phone plan for 'justifiable cause', and I couldn't call out. So I had to figure out another way to get out of my basement."

"Yuhuh?"

"So I search the basement for a crowbar, spare keys, paperclip I can make into a lockpick or something like that. I figure it couldn't possibly be that big, it's a basement under a three bedroom house, and I'd gotten it from a big family that'd decided they wanted to trade Michigan winters for Florida warmth."

"...Wait, you lived in a three person by yourself in Michigan."

"Yep."

"Why?"

"Sometimes I need to get away from my own thoughts."

"Understandable, continue."

"So it turns out that they'd done a lot of underground work in the house over the decades, and their basement covered the entire four block area since no one else wanted the room for storage."

"Yeah?"

"Long story short, I spent two weeks trapped in the basement searching for a way out because, while it covered such a wide area, there was only the one way in or out. And there was a... lot of stuff down there. Food, electronics, stuff to maintain the electronics, books, radiation suits, gas mask and the like. Stuff like they'd been planning for the end of the world. That's the *mundane* shit. They'd been... collecting other things, too, just in case."

"....Like what?"

"Bodies, mostly. ...A *lot* of bodies. Most of them were properly taken care for, put into coffins, not named... but there were others."

"....Isn't the fact there were bodies bad en-"

"There's.... worse things than a quiet death, lad. ...Some of what was down there wasn't strictly human. ....Or dead anymore. ...Don't want to get... into it, there are still on-going investigations and exterminations going on. And there were still people alive down there. ...'Alive.' Only reason I found some of them was because of the scratches on.... and behind the walls." He breathes out.

"..."

"As I said, big place, lots of stuff... not all of it in easy reach. People in those circumstances don't plan or map out the area as they go, since that doesn't happen." CPU takes out a map. "...I had learned from when I was a kid. Had to feed, clothes... take care of a lot of people that had been lost down there for months, if not years. Never seen anyone else, never hear anyone else. Only lived from stashes from others that had been stuck down there, and from the family's storage."

"....Well?"

"Well, it was after two weeks under that I remembered that the basement door's lock had broken when I got the house. Had honestly slipped my mind. So I took everyone to the basement door, prepare them for what had changed, and then Noctis from FF kicked the door open looking for me, apparently Sally had gotten worried that I hadn't shown up for a few weeks and sent someone out to find me, and I broke my neck falling down the stairs. THAT is how I died. Happy now?"
---

"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

https://twitter.com/OuterloopGames/status/1102993595752017920

Apropos of nothing other than it being adorable
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

CPU: "Have you ever wondered what it'd be like if every 5th toilet was sentient?"
Intern: "....Noo.....?"
CPU: "You know, like a mimic."
Intern: "No! Of course not, why?"
CPU: "I was just thinking would they eat people they tricked whole or just bite them in half and leave most of the meat to rot-"
Inter: "What is wrong with you?"
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"I like to quote, because I feel dead people shouldn't be excluded from the conversation." -Stuart Firestein, currently still alive.

CPU: "...Hey, do I remind you of a pill bug? Bowser says I look like one."
Intern: "PFFT-FFF-FFFFFT
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU:
Intern: "....Yes, what is it?"
CPU: https://i.redd.it/ipi5g7se39211.jpg "These are a thing now. ....And they're kinda delicious."
Intern:
Second intern: "...Wait. No, those aren't a thing, but- ....are those homemade?
CPU: "...N-no, I don't even know how to-"
Interns: "WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

Poll #5: Who should face Kora and Eddv?
B) Mario and Sonic

Poll #6: Who should debut next? (They'll have a match, opponent TBD) (I'm going by who could work heel, FYI, since we're currently a bit "face" heavy)
A) Ric Flair "...honestly the rest are *too* good for this scrapheap and we already have Kenshin filling that role"

Intern: "...Not going to comment on-"
CPU: "Nope!"
"...Really."
"Really!"
"...Why not?"
"I don't have to acknowledged when I'm proven wrong, this is the internet!"
"...But you call people on that online all the time-"
"No I don't!"
"I SAW YOU SHOUTING AT SOMEONE ABOUT JOKER BEING 'TOO NICHE FOR SMASH' WHEN BAYONETTA MADE IT-"
"That was my writer!"
"YOU DON'T HAVE A WRITER!"
"Yes I do!"
"I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU WITH A SCRIPT IN YOUR HAND!"
"Oh that's just because I never learned how to read."
"wut,"
"Yeah, I've been making logical guesses at what people have been saying online since 2000."
"...WHY DO YOU HAVE A WRITER IF YOU CAN'T READ" *SLAP*
"Just because I can't read doesn't mean I can't read-"
"THAT IS NOT HOW ANYTHING WORKS AND YOU'RE JUST MESSING WITH ME"
*Looks mildly offended* "Well, I never."
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

Poll #3: What should be on the line for Kenshin v. Bryan?
D) Sakabato vs. Yes Movement (Kenshin loses the sakabato or Bryan loses his Favorite trait)
YES IS DEAD.

Poll #4: What type of match should Bowser have?
A) Bowser v. CPU, Lumberjack

CPU: "...I know how the asshole fans work, however, and I know what they're likely to pick. So. Bryan, you, my friend, talk a good talk, occasionally walk the walk, and occasionally almost your own career because of your poor life choices. And you, if I remember correctly, have been wanting those people in MLMF out of the B8WL. ...At one point at least.

However, you... ignore this, turn into a 'bad man' because almost everyone on the good guys is completely incompetent at BEING a good man. And the only man here that fits that description and is on the active roster, is at risk of losing his career here- and really, moving on to better things like Inciniroar did but still- because of it.

This does not sit well with me. I know, I know, 'you're part of the Men of Low Moral Fiber, why the hell do you care?' Because, unlike 75% of the people here, I stick to what few morals I have, and I try to keep some sense of continuity in this semi-okay written at BEST hellhole. Also, I'm intensely aware of the fact nearly none of the matches here end cleanly. As such, when the voters pick option B, I offer my career in exchange for Kenshin's on the off chance he loses, or gets screwed over.

...Also, Cueto, Miz. If, after the match ends, and he does somehow lose. if you, or anyone that tries through other means, tries to remove Kenshin from his contract by other means..." (glances down at a potion in his hands, smirks at the camera.) "Well, there's a old children's song that comes to mind."

"The cow goes moo.
The pig goes oink.
And... the... dog... goes...
Dad...dy...."

(Turns off the camera, looking down and away from the lens as he does so.)
...i have never been less proud of an implied threat I've made in-character. ._.'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DxtVDHFXQAMjx8L.jpg:large
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU: "HEY KENSHIN!"
Kenshin: "...Oro?"
CPU: "TAKE A LOOK AT DIS COOL-ASS MOTH" https://independent.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com/img/photos/2017/03/27/White-lined_Sphinx_Moth_t958.jpg?fef15e12b784e9bbb22bf3f2924819218cda3d1a
Kenshin: "YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
CPU: "YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU: "'Ey guys, I got a haircut, whaddya think?"
Intern: "I like it, just there's a small problem that- well, the hair isn't the problem."
CPU: "Eh? What's the problem?"
Intern: "...There's no nice way to say this, but your forehead looks like youse trying to call down Batman."
Intern 2: <:o
CPU: "...." *Runs away*
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

live to serve

stop laughing ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU: "I would like to bring to the attention of the viewing audience that one King Bowser is a silly billy, and that I will FIGHT ALL OF HIS SCUMBAG NOT-CHILDREN FOR WHAT THEY PULLED LET ME AT 'EM I'LL FORCE THEM TO EAT EACH OTHER ALIVE ON REGIONAL TE- HMPH HMMM HMMPHHMMMMMmmmmmmm"

Intern: "Yo, boss, thanks for calmin' him down, but... why do you have chloroform?"

????: "I- hyuck- have traveled across dozens of dimensions and lands, and dealt with a lot of nonsense in each and every single one of them. Sometime Sora and Donald aren't there, and I have to be sneaky. The question- hyuck- is not why do I have chloroform, it why would I not have chloroform?"

Intern: "...I see."
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...If possible switch both my votes to C because I am not dealing with this tie nonsense.
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

B
A

You may add one celeb, and one Current Wrestler!
Bob Ross, Elias?.
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...I'm okay with the idea of a Lethal Lottery ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...Part of me feels like giving Miz co-GM duties with Cueto would be a decent thought.

https://rave.dj/d47aoQeTWvwWuQ

also did this and it's sadly the best combo with any of Truth's themes
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU: "Except for all of you in Wales. You're *all* going there because you refuse to use an ACTUAL language!"

Crowd: "QYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY"

CPU: "BUT HAPPY NEW YEARS ANYWAYS YOU LINGUISTICS REPROBATES"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

CPU: *Pointing at the audience.* "There is a special place in hell for EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU UNAPPRECIATIVE SCUMBAGS!"

Crowd: "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

CPU: "It's anyplace in hell, because it's you that makes it special!" *Wink, fingerguns*

Crowd: ".....booooooo?"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

No objections. ^_^' Mostly made him that so he's not confused with the DC Joker. ...WHo I *think* is in here?
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...I'm... actually surprised there're more folks populating Mexico in the mod than three different regions. o-o' ....and slightly amused there's exact *one* more US rep ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

(A dose of stupid)

CPU : "...." *staaaaaaare*
Kenshin: "Oro? Charles, what're you looking at me for- ... let me rephrase, why're you staring at me this time?"
CPU: "...." *Keeps staring, slowly raises a odd pair of eyewear to camera level.*
Kenshin: "Why are you-"
CPU: "Groucho glasses!" *Puts them on Kenshin.*
Kenshin: "...." *glowering through the swirly eyes*
CPU: "EEEHEEHEEHEEE" *Runs away*
Kenshin: "GET BACK HERE"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dvc_juIU0AUyrdN.jpg:large
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

Slip has won the MPire tag titles with...Obelisk, not his partner. ....Huh, was honestly expecting Greg Valentine. O_o'
Sycho Sid wound up in MPire somehow and won their top belt. ...yeah that makes sense. ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...I am, when it's my turn to detail, going to try to justify using the phrase 'Furry Woolie denies your Hot Zone' *somewhere*.

(Also merry Christmas)
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...I actually really like the idea of Smash for MoT.
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

"FUR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE TAKE ME WITH YOU INCINEROAR- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

Not familiar with the first two... haven't followed Wright since 2004... and I hate David Cage more than I hate Batman. ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

https://rave.dj/mPZmVEnbcj6zGQ
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

"...If I see the phrases 'Home Alone Match' or 'Die Hard Match' when I see the card tonight..."
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

I did some cleaning of my sheet, but I immediately forgot how many people I deleted. ._.'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

I can still cut folk from my sheet if ya'd like, Tahm, save ya a little hassle down the line. ^_^'
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

I dunno, honestly. Spinning off comics seems reasonable, though.
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.

...Ya know, whoever made Bounce Man sentient was a jackass.
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I'll die on this hill, but no one will show up to kill me.