Padre Inquirer
By The SPOILERS Man
As the Padres season was about to kick off, we were shocked to hear the entire team had been traded, including Tony Gwynn for AlecTrevelyn. On top of this, clearly the franchise had traded away the production crew, as the game began about 30 minutes late and it was up to us, the media, to ensure the game was recorded properly.
To be frank, I have never been so disappointed with a team in the history of time. First game of the season and instead of trusting Regaro to do his damn job and close, his knees were taken out from under him, destroying his mental state and directly causing our lone loss of the season the next day. Additionally, I think everyone can agree that there is a move that must be made.
We have to trade Sir Cobain. His value will never be higher, and his numbers are going to tank because he lacks the True Talent required to lead a team to victory. Additionally, his violent attitude towards the baseball has spread to the team's treatment of their opponents, our once-honorable team punching players with the ball to tag them out.
This team is an embarrassment, and I beg fans to send letters to the franchise demanding that the team's dignity be restored.
This has been The SPOILERS Man, over and out.
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