Season Nine Episode Seven: Hobgoblins
Network: Sci-Fi Channel
Riffers: Tom Servo, Mike Nelson, and Crow T. Robot
Mads: Pearl Forrester, Professor Bobo, and Brain Guy
Plot Synopsis: Dorky loser Kevin gets a job as a security guard at an old film vault, and he is shown the ropes by superior Security Guard McCreedy. Even though McCreedy explicitly warns him not to go down a certain hallway, Kevin does it anyways. He finds a vault, opens it, and releases on the world Hobgoblins. Oh, and don't forget your two scoops of sleaze that stinks up the entire film.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Due to the Robert Palmer version of the song "I Didn't Mean To Turn You On", the MatBs have been exposed to the concept of accidental and involutary turn-ons, with even the slightest gesture being construed as a attempt to turn each other on.
Segment One: The on-turning has reached a stage of increasing malice with intentional turning on. Pearl is remodelling Castle Forrester, and her new couch has turned up early, having Brain Guy send it up to SOL for storage. However, MatBs jump up and down on it, with all manner of 'stainable liquids.' Pearl threatens them with... The Movie... that shows up in the Ark of the Covenant.
Segment Two: Due to the questionable stereotypes in the movie, Crow decides to create a film called "Let's Talk Women!", but his limited exposure to women outside of movies causes him to proclaim them to be mythical creatures. Mike reminds him of Pearl, but chokes when Crow demands that Mike name one other woman.
Segment Three: Crow sets up a 'crisis hotline' to help people who have seen the film Hobgoblins, but Bobo abuses Crow's goodwill to discuss another less savory crisis...
Segment Four: Continuing to use cardboard cut-outs, Cardboard MatBs sing a pretty catchy songs about today's movie. The real Mike and the Bots unsuccessfully try to flee, with Brain Guy spending fruitless minutes trying to point out to Pearl and Bobo the ruse.
Ending Segment: Servo is The Terminator, having traveled back in time to "take care of" Rick Sloane. Crow's film research points out he may have had opposite effect however. Pearl takes back the couch from the immature SOL crew, but the couch is no more safe from her minions either.
Stinger: The Hobgoblins ride around in a golf cart.
Review:
I remember reading somewhere that this movie was actually made as a parody of your typical goofy monster movies. Unlike other Parody Retcons, this does seem legit, since there are a few shades of silly (like when they use cartoon sound effects as normal sound effects in a few scenes.) However, since the gags and jokes aren't funny at all, and all in all this movie feels like it is quite possibly the sleaziest bit of film ever shown on MST3K.
The riffing is extremely entertaining for this movie. Lots of good riffs about the loser boyfriend, the sleaze, Mr. McCreedy, the sleaze, the goofy monster puppets, and the sleaze. A notable gag about this movie is that over the ending credits, Rick Sloane, the director of the film, shows up via cardboard. MatBs do a rather insulting interview with him, which is equally funny. The host segments enjoyable as well (with the cardboard cutout MatBs singing a song being a real highlight.) One of the better episodes of season nine, this is. 10/10
Trivia: Rick Sloane actually OFFERED the movie to Best Brains to use, and he even enjoyed the riffing to the movie.. that is until the end credits, where they mercilessly mocked him. Sloane, a fan of the series, said he hadn't seen them rip into a director before. Clearly, he never watched a Coleman Francis, Ed Wood, Bert I. Gordon, or Roger Corman flick.
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http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/8-gamefaqs-contests/61035294 - My MST3K Watchthrough topic.