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Snowball Fight #Unlucky 13 - Y'sh Tola Rhul

Ritz had taken a temporary break from her killing to get her learner's license, in a jurisdiction where you only need to be 14 to get it. Because you need an adult as a passenger to drive, she took the time to dig Lightning's corpse out of her grave and put it in the passenger seat, because if she got pulled over by the police it might be plausible that it was just her mom who was high off her face on percocets. Genius.

After a few hours of learning she parked her ratty 1999 Subaru Legacy, and an envelope whisked through the air and landed in front of her. It read as follows:

"Congratulations on your hard work, dearest Ritz, in honour of your continuing massacre's success, I have decided to gift you a brand new Toyota Corolla to aid you in your journey. You may find it at [Insert Smiffficia Address Here].

With love,
Emet-Selch

Return Address
[Insert other Smiffficia Address Here]"

Ritz was elated - whoever this Emet-Selch was, (she was unsure because clearly his game came out after Final Fantasy Tactics Advance) she appreciated his generosity. She found the listed address and what she saw horrified her. It was a white Corolla adorned with giant viera ears and instead of paint, it was fur. The headlights were... horrifying as they had been adjusted to look like eyes. As well, the license plate read SNWBLL.

Immediately, she began having flashbacks to Shara's death and her trauma about having white hair. A furor immediately overtook her and she wanted to confront this 'Emet-Selch'. As she headed to the driver's seat with Lightning's corpse in tow, she found a note stuck under the windshield wipers which said "I'm sorry, the only car we had available was this Y'sh Toyota Corhulla. My sincerest apologies."

She got in the car and stepped on the gas, careening through Smiffficia to the return address Emet had provided so that she could give him a piece of her mind. As she approached the building at the address, a white-haired Viera stepped out and Ritz's PTSD kicked into gear. Memories of Shara overflowed and she put the pedal to the floor, striking the white Viera who was violently thrown approximately 15m, because the imperial system is still inferior.

As Ritz got out of the car, she decided that due to the license plate, this was technically a snowball kill, which was good enough for her. Another envelope fluttered down and she opened it up - "Thank you for doing my work for me. With nastiness, Emet-Selch." While Ritz acknowledged that she had been played, she wasn't upset for she had claimed another victim. Perhaps she could meet this Emet-Selch in the future, should she survive another 17 rounds.

After dismantling the Viera ears from the side of the car she drove off to find Mustadio's Body Shop, where she could get the car fixed and painted pink, as well as get the blood cleaned off. As she set off, she pushed Lightning's body out the passenger door as Mustadio might not take kindly to her showing up with a corpse. Genius.