LogFAQs > #964632127

from another forum
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I(33f) decided to help my brother(31m) with OLD apps. He has been struggling with dating and OLD apps for 3 years now and parents are concerned about his mental health. So I invited him to stay with me for a couple of weeks and told him that I would help him "fix" his dating app profiles as I was certain that he was doing something wrong. He halfheartedly agreed and brought a second phone that I could use.
He is 6'0'', 165 lbs and has moderately good looks. He has a stable job which makes him good money.
I set up his account on Tinder and Bumble, and completed his profile, description etc on his second phone. I also swiped and initially chatted with the women who matched with the profile. My aim was to show him how to talk to women to keep them interested in him because his main complaint was that they never respond. I thought of sending the first few messages and then letting him continue the conversation. It has been 2 weeks now, my experience has been utter garbage. Nobody wants to have a conversation. I don't quite understand why. Maybe I am doing something wrong?
I feel depressed, probably because all these years, I kept telling him that he was doing something wrong. I always thought that only rude, broke, obese, unhygienic and bad looking men sucked at dating apps and others had a fair chance. Well, I was in for a rude awakening. This is what I experienced.

1. Very few matches, when compared to what we women get. He got a few matches on the first couple of days. Post that, it's just a match or 2 a day. I used to get scores of "good" matches everyday when I used OLD for myself - and I was very picky.
2. Hardly any responses from his matches. Women just don't want to have anything to do with him. This was perhaps what affected me the most. I watched in despair as matches just kept expiring. Sometimes they would stop after a few messages and other times they wouldn't even send a message or a reply. I have used bumble and tinder myself. Men don't do this. 90 percent of men respond to the first message. This is worse than getting a dick pic (which has happened to me a few times). At least the person on the other side wants you - even if it is just for sex. Imagine being ignored like a piece of trash. That's what it felt like. 90 percent of the matches never initiated the conversation on responded to the first message. How is he supposed to get a date when there are no responses from the other side.
3. Very poor quality matches. Most women who matched with his profile were nowhere close to his educational qualifications or salary range. In fact, there wasn't even a single match who initiated a conversation that I would say matched his salary and education level. I never had this problem on OLD apps. There were loads of men who were either equal or better than me in salary and education. I met my current bf on bumble and he makes as much as I do.

I don't know why men even go through this. He seems to be okay with this experience and is holding his own - I don't understand how. I know we can't change the dating scene much. The least we can do is empathize with the person instead of telling them they are doing something wrong. Honestly, I don't even know if I am doing anything wrong myself. I am just doing what worked for me.
I am going to ask him to stop using OLD and go out there. I am sure he will find it easier to find a good woman to date in real life.
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zoomers are screwed. hell half the millennials are too, aging into their 30s with no family. escape out of the apps and social media for true romance.