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| Topic | Board 8 Ranks 2010s Horror Movies - The Final Chapter - *THE RANKINGS* |
| Snake5555555555 05/26/22 3:00:17 PM #119: | Inviso - While The VVitch may have never fully clicked with me, The Lighthouse certainly did. Robert Eggers style choices of black & white with an almost 1:1 aspect ratio are perfect for this setting, and both actors are in top form. Also makes excellent use of the unreliable narrator trope. BetrayedTangy - Alright so Im just gonna be honest here. The VVitch just isnt my cup of tea. Dont get me wrong Eggers proved himself to be a master of the craft with this movie alone, but when I want to watch a movie for fun, Its not going to be the one with dialogue from the 1600s. On the other hand, if I want to watch a movie like this, Im just going to watch The Lighthouse instead. Now that Ive attempted to justify the midtier ranking, I do want to at least talk about some of my favorite aspects. The biggest thing for me is honestly the portrayal of Satan. Hes usually either incredibly dramatic or so evil you wonder how he could have any kind of influence over sane people. Here though hes calm, patient and lets the religious paranoia bring his victims down. Like for Christ's sake he spends most of the movie as a damn goat and still gets Thomasin to join him in the end. Speaking of which, Anya Taylor-Joy is very quickly becoming one of my favorite actors. Not only is she an actual queen when it comes to accents, but she also breathes a lot of life into this movie by having fun with the dialogue. Her line about William chopping wood all day had me actually rolling. The other thing that really gets me is how horrific this movie can get. Like we have witches sacrificing babies and crows pecking at nipples, like holy shit. I was not ready for half of the stuff this movie threw at me and goddamn was it effective. Red13n - A couple of crappy parents lose track of their infant, have two kids consorting with a demon goat and then gets what is coming to them by making their one good kid say fuck it and join the demon goat. This is pretty by the books horrible things happen to a family til we get the interesting twist at the end that yes, the dumb goat thats been running around the whole time actually was behind it all. I wouldn't call it particularly exciting, like many of the movies on this list the point more than overstays its welcome, but at least the dumb ending where everyone gets what they deserve could probably make you crack a smile. PrinceKaro - The story of a christian family with sticks so far up their asses that they somehow manage to get kicked out of a Puritan settlement for being too religious. So they go and build a farm in the middle of nowhere where they can live in the light of the Lord, which in this case means being assholes to each other until it is pretty much Little Jerry Springer Show on the Prairie. Anyway, supernatural forces assault the homestead, and with her toxic family finally dead, the main girl makes a pact with Satan and then runs off into the woods to be a witch. I actually really liked the ending, but there is so much that is unrefined about everything that leads us up to that point. Like we have this mysterious witch who may or may not be more than one person and we also have a demon goat who probably isn't the witch maybe. Everyone talks in a manner that is so weird and mumbley, that I can probably understand less than 20 percent of the things that come out of their mouths. It is so bad that they might as well be speaking in Klingon. Son of a v-vitch. Plasmabeam - The best sleep-aid in the history of horror. An absolute slog and the worst movie on the list. --- I've decided to put my fears behind me. I'm not going back. https://www.instagram.com/horror_obscurities/ ... Copied to Clipboard! |
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