LogFAQs > #969131918

I don't feel like trying to go into full explanation so here is just verbatim the message I sent to my friend after seeing it

so
there's a cult horror movie from like 6 years ago called Terrifier, typical guy dressed as a mime killing people movie, with very mixed reactions because it is EXTREMELY brutally violent and gory
I don't think you'd be a big fan
there's one scene from it that is particularly infamous that I really don't care for because it feels in bad taste and kind of different in tone than the rest of the movie
it features a woman hung naked upside down, being cut in half vertically from crotch to face. It was hard to watch
well ANYWAY so Terrifier 2 just came out like a week or two ago, has a higher RT score by like 30%, and people in the B8 horror topic were talking about how it's way better than the first, and I saw it was playing in Regal tonight so I thought wth why not I can spend 80 minutes watching a dumb horror movie
THE FUCKING MOVIE WAS TWO AND A HALF HOURS
and I should make it clear, the movie did not need to be two and a half hours
the movie didn't need to be 2 hours
holy shit was it something to sit through

Oh no give me a rundown

oh man like
ok so by itself it's a pretty simple, guy dressed as a clown terrorizes some people, goes particularly after a 20-something girl and her family
only like it started trying to add in like supernatural elements that were really half-baked and didn't make sense? like the clown (his name is Art the Clown, and he's mute like a mime) starts seeing visions of a creepy little clown girl that follows him around but other people dont see her
except the final girl and her little brother
they can see her
and final girl's dad apparently had a tumor in his brain and went crazy and killed himself a year earlier, but in his notebook there are drawings of Art the Clown and then also this elaborate like angel valkyrie halloween costume that the girl was making for herself
also her room magically catches fire at one point after she has a nightmare about the clown and a burning building
but like the clown has become a local legend after the events of the first movie so whenever he goes around in full costume people just think he's some guy dressed up as the real killer for Halloween (the movie makes a jab at real-life assholes dressing up as Dahmer for Halloween which was pretty good admittedly)
so of course Art starts killing off all the girl's friends and family in disturbing, loooong torture sequences
and he's like god-like invincible for some reason in the way Michael Myers is sometime, but like even more goofy invincible
but then she gets like mortally injured, but then this magical sword suddenly heals her and she comes back to life to kill Art and chops his head off and then the creepy clown girl comes and takes his head and her eyes glow all demony
and that's basically the movie
which is spoilers but I don't think you'll ever watch it and I can't say I'd recommend it

No I wont ever watch that hahaha oh my god

also apparently there's a midcredit scene but I didn't see it because I left the second the credits started to roll
and since I got out of the theater a solid hour later than expected I went and got taco bell for dinner and it slapped again
seriously get some taco bell asap while it's this good [editing note: the taco bell near the theater is usually garbage but the last two times I've been there it's been really shockingly good]
also it should be mentioned that the writer has literally no idea how human beings talk to the point that M Night Shyamalan dialogue sounds natural by comparison
oh also at one point the little clown girl mimics the voice of the brother over the phone to mislead the main girl and that power is never used or referenced again

They were just like, can we string together imagery to make a scary movie but not have it matter

honestly yeah
so originally the Terrifiers were short films and anthology stuff before he made a full movie of it, and the movie was just stuff from the short films stretched into a whole movie
and this like every scene just felt "ok what's something really violent or maybe silly that could happen now" and then a thin thread of plot stringing them together