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TopicAnagram Ranks Anything Legend of Zelda-related with Full Write-Ups (spoilers)
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08/01/23 1:01:41 PM
#210:


I Coveted That Wind
Link (Soul Calibur II)
Fierce Deity Link
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild: It's this or OoT for best game in the series, at least until I get to TotK. It's the first game since MM that just did everything right, or at least almost everything. The dungeons are a little lame, and there are no moments in the game that feel super significant, like your quest has taken a new and important turn, but... who cares? The game nails everything else. Everyone talks about this, but how you just wake up, leave a cave, and your objective is to travel to a place, and you're given no instructions about how to get there, is genius. It's just such a bold direction for a series that gets so easily mired in its own traditions, even moreso than Mario or Pokemon. The idea that they just made an open world Zelda game, and that's it, no other tricks or gimmicks or addendums, just do whatever you want whenever you want, is such a good idea. And the physics of the gameplay! Being able to solve puzzles by just farting around with objects is so cool, it feels utterly unlike all Zelda games before, where you always had to figure out what the developers intended for you to do and then follow the plan. Everything about this game just feels so ****ing fresh, and it probably wouldn't have if I played more open world games, but I don't, so it all felt fresh to me. There are even a few moments in the game that feel magical, like when you climb up a big mountain and see a dragon for the first time. Sure, it's annoying every subsequent time, when you're just there to farm scales, but still. The idea that the developers were like "we'll let you solve any problem your own way," and then actually did, is so impressive to me. You know that island where you lose your equipment? I didn't know you were supposed to use a raft to reach it. I stood on top of crag, jumped off, and then just spammed stamina potions to keep gliding until I reached it. There is no other Zelda game, and few other games period, that would have let me do that. I'm so impressed by this game, and my understanding is that TotK is even better. The reason I have OoT over it, though, is that I can more easily imagine myself replaying OoT than BotW. Arbitrary, but there you go.
Paraglider
Zelda/Sheik in Smash
Ocarina (Instrument): You're the writer for a fantasy game, and your main character needs an instrument. It needs to be small and mobile. Do you choose the harp? The flute? The cello? Wait, there was a game where you collect a ****ing organ? Anyway, the ocarina is such a good choice. It's a real instrument, but it looks like a fake fantasy one, and it has that slight air of elegance to it. Even the color of deep purple feels significant (even though it's blue in all of the artwork). You can actually believe that someone would invest vast magical powers into it. It actually seems as powerful and important as the Master Sword, even if it has literally no backstory at all. At least with a sword, you can just assume that someone made it to fight evil people. Why does an ocarina have magic time and teleportation powers? Why does the Royal Family have one? I dunno! And it's funny, too. This is the macguffin the game is named for, this is the key to Link's quest, it's in half of the promotional art, this is the seemingly most important tool he possesses, he pops it out constantly throughout his adventure... and there is no explanation for its powers, Zelda just chucks it at you partway through the game, and the game never really makes a big deal out of it. The Ocarina of Time is there at almost every significant moment in the game after you get it, but no attention is ever drawn to it, not like the other important macguffins in the series. I think the idea of a magical instrument that uses magic songs to achieve magical effects is genius, and the specific choice of ocarina is also great. As a kid, when I got this item, I was like "but wait, what about the Fairy Ocarina?!" They wouldn't just have it disappear today. If this game was made today, the Fairy Ocarina would either break just before you get the Ocarina of Time, or you'd need to use it later for something the Ocarina of Time can't do, like to connect to Saria in the spirit world or something. It's so funny, the game made a big deal out of the Fairy Ocarina early on, and then it's just completely forgotten about as soon as you get the fancier, more powerful one. I also appreciate how the Ocarina of Time is with you in MM. Like, it's nice to have continuity between the games, even though it doesn't REALLY make a lot of sense? I would assume Zelda would want this thing back after you beat Ganondorf, it should have really been the Fairy Ocarina you use in that game, but it's fine. So, question. When you use a transformation mask, is it turning the Ocarina of Time into the other instruments, or do they just have their other instruments with them, and you use them instead of the Ocarina of Time? Because my impression is that the Ocarina of Time is special and magical and unique, and normal instruments can't turn back time or whatever, especially not a random Goron adventurer's drums. Anyway, ocarinas, yes. Definitely the best instrument in the series, but it was wise not to bring it back after MM. I think it's smarter to have each Link have a different instrument, and--wait, there are more ocarinas? MC has the "Ocarina of Wind," and it looks exactly like the Ocarina of Time? ... well okay then.
Midna
Legend of Zelda (Theme)
Link (GameFAQs)
Gerudo Valley (Theme)

Good!
Cadence of Hyrule
Master Sword
Princess Zelda (Spirit Tracks)
Koji Kondo
Triforce
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Gerudo Outfit (BotW)
Swordless Link Trick (OoT)
Cia
The Missing Link
Goron
Hookshot
Champion's Tunic (BotW): I'm going to list the video game characters I think are more famous than Link: Mario, Luigi, Peach, Bowser, Donkey Kong, Pac-Man, Pikachu, Sonic. That's probably it, though I might be missing something obvious. None of those characters ever really change their iconic looks. Sure, sometimes they'll put on a sports outfit for a minigame or something, but when you think of Mario, you think of red. Link has almost that level of fame, and he has equally iconic clothing, and they just dumped it. I have a lot of respect for them for doing that. It's a signal right away to the audience that this is not like the previous Zelda games, that this game is going to do its own thing. Link's old tunic and floppy hat? Get that **** out of here. Link's favorite color is green? Not anymore. Now Link wears whatever he wants for the stats, like this is WoW or something. I would actually have even more respect for them if you couldn't get the iconic green outfit at all in BotW. It's a minor signal, but every other Zelda game ever either starts you with the green tunic, or you get it early on, and there's a big to-do about it where everyone makes a big deal of it for one reason or another, always emphasizing how this is an important moment in your life. Not only does that not happen, but there's no equivalent moment at all. The closest thing is when Impa gives you this tunic and is like "this is what you wore one-hundred years ago," but it's not played up the same way as like Link becoming a knight in SS or Link gaining Ezlo the magical hat in MC. It was such a daring thing to do that I just really have to compliment them for it. Oh yeah, and the tunic itself is cool, too.
Hearts
Song of Storms
CD-I Cutscenes
Legend of Zelda (Name)
Great Fairies
The Vision in Lanayru Spring
Skull Kid
Going Straight to Castle Hyrule in BotW
Japanese Link to the Past commercial


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Started: July 6, 2005
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