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TopicAnagram Ranks Anything Legend of Zelda-related with Full Write-Ups (spoilers)
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08/05/23 9:59:30 PM
#297:


I Coveted That Wind
Link (Soul Calibur II)
Fierce Deity Link
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Ganondorf (WW): This isn't even close to Ganondorf's coolest look. If we're just talking about his looks, it's got to be TotK > HW > OoT > TP > WW. But this is definitely Ganondorf's best as a character, in that it's the only time he even comes close to feeling like a real character. I kind of like the way he looks, actually, in the sense of degeneration. In OoT, he looks like some kind of warlord-general-king, slightly fancy, but mostly functional. And in TP, he's wearing very fancy armor and has his hair styled in a way that must have taken hours. But in WW? He's just wearing robes, and he's slightly fat. The only thing that makes him look like a king is the little tiara thing on his forehead. I'm probably reading too much into this, but if you want to take the Zelda series seriously as a real story, then the WW version of Hyrule is definitely a degenerated, destroyed version of Hyrule. It's gone, and the survivors are just eking out a fragile existence in the corpse that remains. Ganondorf and the King of Red Lions are the only remnants of the older, more glorious past, and Ganondorf by this point is just obsessed with recreating the old Hyrule so he can rule over it, and now all he is is a big fat guy wearing loose-fitting robes, pining about what set him on the path of evil in the first place but still fighting just for the sake of power itself. Ganondorf seems almost like a real character, the degenerated remains of a once-greater man, and the last thing tying Link and Zelda and the survivors to the old world, the last kind of pathetic string that needs to be cut before the world can move on. You can also say this retroactively about all of classic Ganon's appearances, as him just being the degenerated version of Ganondorf after centuries of defeat by Link, but WW Ganondorf seems more capable of reflection and realizing that he could have done better. He's by far the most compelling version of Ganondorf ever, but probably the most compelling main villain in any Nintendo title ever? I love OoT, but OoT and TP Ganondorf is just a big jackass who wants to take over the world for no real reason. It's also kind of interesting that this is the moment where Ganondorf goes from being a sorcerer to a fighter? All of classic Ganon's appearances, yeah, he has a trident, but he mainly attacks you with magic, and OoT Ganondorf attacks exclusively with magic until he becomes Ganon. Here, he completely ditches magic for swords, and every appearance after this is no magic, sword-only. And it's always a different sword style, too. He dual-wields in WW and HW, he uses a giant two-handed sword in TP, and he apparently uses a katana in TotK? At least Link is consistent.
Paraglider
Zelda/Sheik in Smash
Ocarina (Instrument)
Midna
Legend of Zelda (Theme)
Nintendo
Link (GameFAQs)
Gerudo Valley (Theme)

Good!
Cadence of Hyrule
Master Sword
Princess Zelda (Spirit Tracks)
Koji Kondo
ReDead
Triforce
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Gerudo Outfit (BotW)
Swordless Link Trick (OoT)
Cia
The Missing Link
Goron
Hookshot
Champion's Tunic (BotW)
Hearts
Rupees
Song of Storms
CD-I Cutscenes
Legend of Zelda (Name)
Great Fairies
The Vision in Lanayru Spring
Skull Kid
Going Straight to Castle Hyrule in BotW
Biggoron's Sword
Japanese Link to the Past commercial
Brawl in the Family
Sheik

Hey, Listen!
The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
Z3R
Dead Man's Volley
Bongo Bongo
Anju/Kafei Quest
Magnet Gloves
Gold NES Cartridges
BotW Cooking Jingle
Hestu's Gift
Secret Jingle
Twinrova
Stealing from the LA Shop
Stone Tower Temple
Linkle
Bombos Medallion
His Name is Zelda
Second Quest
Tatl & Tael
Great Bay Temple
Heroic Fantasy
The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
Link, the Silent Protagonist
The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons/Ages
Ravio
Groose
Fighter Choices (Smash)
Wallmaster
Ghirahim
OoT Title Screen
Medli
Saria
Subtitles
Well ExcuuuuUUUUuuuuuuUUUUuuUuuuUUUUse Me, Princess!
Jeremy
Radio Zelda (Commercials)
Water Temple (OoT)
Hyrule Warriors
Green (Color)
The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds
I'm so Hungry, I could eat an Octorok!
Molgera's Boss Theme
Kirby (Link's Awakening)
King Zora
Ganon's Tower (LttP)
The Mask Salesman
Dark World
Shigeru Miyamoto
Navi
Tetra
Phonogram Man
Royal Crest
The Moon
Dark Link
Door Charge Old Man
Bombable Walls
Wind Fish
Gleeokenspiel
Any% Speedruns: Most speedruns I watch are things people link me to because they're funny or neat. I very rarely seek out and watch speedruns on my own. However, when I do watch speedruns, I only ever watch any% ones. As far as I'm concerned, this is the true speedrun, and any other version (such as 100%) is a speedrun with an extra challenge. I think that's the common opinion, right? Like, watching speedruns can be fun as a way to say "oh man, I didn't know you could do that," or "God, this guy is way better than I'll ever be." The most interesting speedrun I think I've ever watched was a TAS of RE4 that took like one hour by glitching through things, but if TASes don't count, then it's a 16-minute Baldur's Gate 1 speedrun, when the #2 place was like 51 minutes. I think I could probably replicate that 16-minute one, honestly, or even do better? But I don't want to steal the guy's strategy, and I'm not a speedrunner anyway, so I've never done it. Regardless, even if I don't like speedruns most of the time, I have nothing against them. I've never seen any Zelda speedrun, only randomized speedrun competitions of Zelda 1 and Zelda 2.
Sidon
Poe Collector


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