LogFAQs > #892895713

As most of you know, my wife was violently killed in a wreck on October 3rd of this year (2017.) I didn't want to make this... I don't like asking for money in most cases. My friends had to convince me it was a good idea. I went from 4 incomes to 1 (two of her jobs, and I lost my second job), and these bills are getting terrifying. I don't care about money in the light of losing my soul mate, it's one of the last things on my mind... you can't take it with you when you die, it's just material. Yet, while I'm still breathing, my debt is piling up at an alarming rate. If you want to donate that would mean the world to me, or if you can share it that would be nice. If not, I understand, but it means a lot to me if you at least think of her and myself, and pray for her, myself, and my family.

LINK: https://www.gofundme.com/4ut69b-trying-to-rebuild-my-life

(If this is against TOS, I apologize. I looked everywhere and couldn't find anything against sharing this.)

Those of you that don't know what happened, I was on vacation with my wife in Texas to visit her family (fiancee legally, we never made it to the ceremony... but we both agreed that a piece of paper from the US government does not determine if we are married, we were husband and wife under God), and someone in a truck lost control in the rain and hit us head on. I have absolutely no memory of the wreck, both from a serious head injury, and likely from grief and trauma. I was in a restaurant one minute, and in the hospital the next. (Apparently a day or two later.) After slowly coming to my sense enough to realize where I was, I asked the doctor "Why am I in a hospital??? Where am I???" The doctor told me I need to stay as still as I could and that I was in an extremely serious car accident. I had apparently been cut out with the jaws of life while unconscious, and air lifted by helicopter. I demanded to know where my wife was, and the doctor told me we would talk about that in a minute. He later came back with my mother-in-law who was sobbing, and she told me that I was in a car wreck. I asked "Well where is Sabine??? WHERE IS MY WIFE??????" and she just shook her head and cried and said "I'm so sorry, Corey.... I'm so sorry...." and I grabbed her shirt and screamed at the top of my lungs and cried for what felt like hours. The rest of October is a blur, except for a few images. I remember seeing my wife's body laying there in a morgue or something. I said my goodbyes and had an absolute panic attack and started throwing up outside. I slightly remember seeing the wrecked vehicle to get some of my belongings out. I had a similar reaction to seeing my wife's body, because I knew that mangled car of ours was where Sabine had been killed. Our 5-year-old niece was in the back seat, too, and Thank God had only minor injuries... but she was conscious for the whole thing. So she saw my wife take her last breath while unconscious, and she saw me laying there unconscious being pried out of the wreckage and taken to a helicopter. My older brother said to me that he first got a phone call that "Sabine was dead, and you might be." He dropped his beer and ran to his wife and cried for hours, until he got a second phone call saying that "I was alive but unconscious and critical in the ICU." He told me "I don't mean this in a ****ty way, but that second phone call didn't make me any happier. I knew that either way, you had died in that wreck."

http://m.lampasasdispatchrecord.com/news/2017-10-06/Front_Page/Woman_killed_in_US_190_wreck.html#.WkKNJTe1ubL

Not only should I be dead physically (the engine was to the back seat... where we sat was nothing but metal, glass, and blood...), but emotionally I am a shattered human being. I wish I had gone with her, I am angry that I survived.
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IT'S TOO LATE... TO GO BACK... I let darkness.. seep through the cracks...
Love is bleeding, I curse my breathing... the day is gone.. the day is gone...