LogFAQs > #958825538

Mountain Dew Thrashed Apple? More like Mountain Dew Trash Apple. Allow me to describe the flavor: Imagine the taste of cheap apple schnapps that's been soaked and filtered through a homeless man's jockstrap then twice distilled in a strip club carpet. The bouquet of flavor and fragrances curls your nose hairs and the vile, bitter liquid does to your taste buds what Jeffrey Dahmer did to his victims.

In fact I'd rather drink battery acid. I'd rather poke my pee hole with Franks Red Hot. I'd rather let Fester Addams peg me with red hot pokers. If I had Doc Brown's time machine, I would have sex with my own mother only to destroy the space-time continuum so Mountain Dew Thrashed Apple could never be created.

I double dare you to take a swig and not instantly regret it making your face contort into the twisted grimace of pain and disgust. Imagine if your parents packed one of these for your lunch, you'd think they didn't love you. Thrashed Apple was responsible for your parent's breaking up. It's the reason grandma calls you by a different name.

This flavor will take something you thought you loved, like Mountain Dew, and completely stomps it in the gutter, playing with your emotions and unveiling a reality of depravity and betrayal. The taste of sour apples haunts your palate like the memory a bad break up. Mountain Dew Thrashed Apple hurts so bad to drink, Robert Smith would write a song about it. Goth Girls drink Thrashed Apple when they want to feel sad. It's like sucking on a sour foot and not in a good way.

It fuckin' sucks, it suckin' fucks....and I don't like it.

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"He busted in, blessed be the Lord
Who believe any mess they read up on a message board" -MF DOOM 1970-2020 (G.O.A.T.)