LogFAQs > #962346386

AngelicRadiance posted...

I'm already doing this and not trans

Hey, there are lots of ways to be miserable. We live in a miserable country, even! But having a male level of T was really bad for my brain. That, evidently, was the root of my misery.

googs19 posted...

Well, I'm about there now and working in the "find a therapist" step. Now to see if I can do it without losing my wife and kids!

Ok, so, a few things:
1) Congrats! It took me almost 33 years to get to that point, and then COVID blew everything up and it took forever to get from "admitting I was trans" to "seeing trans dude therapist". So, uhh, I know that's hard

2) I never even managed to go on a date once: I had zero confidence and deeply suppressed jealousy of women (I realized that that's what it was after I had come out to myself and was watching the last half season of BoJack Horseman with a friend. She runs and likes to wear skirts: her legs are and have always been lovely, and I realized I didn't *just* want to stroke them [I never would, for the record: she was never into me like that and is straight as a board], but to have legs like hers!). Combine that with the usual wooziness of being attracted to a woman, and, well...I'm not surprised it never even started working, LOL.

3) But yeah, wife and kids is a lot to navigate. Unfortunately, it's perfectly plausible your wife will leave you, even if she accepts you. It's also possible she'll still be into you. But as I explained above, I can't give you advice on that. Here are a pair of trans women on Twitter who had wives and/or kids, with stories that went various ways:
https://twitter.com/emmy_zje
https://twitter.com/vyrthandi
Certainly I've found following them both helpful myself.