>walk into Gamestop >ask for a copy of Atelier Totori >"What?" >spaghetti slowly drips from my pockets >oh fuck not again >face gets red >"Please give me a copy of Atelier Totori right now." >"I don't know what that is. What platform is it on?" >struggling to contain my embarrassment >clenching asscheeks together to hold in my shit >voice reduced to a mumble >"have money please alterlier torti give money please game" >"Are you okay?" >shit breaches through my asscheeks >propelled forward at 60mph >crash through the Gamestop employee's counter >he's holding onto me for dear life >all the while spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets like fumes >crash through the entire row of buildings in the strip mall, broken glass shards in my face >yelling "ATELIER TOTORI PLEASE MONEY ATELIER GAMESTOP TOTORI" >Gamestop employee is covered in shit and spaghetti >my pocket rocket shows no signs of stopping >he tilts me backwards >the sheer force of my shit has reached 650mph, we are now propelling upwards >the spaghetti and shit intertwines and falls down to earth in glorious yellow and brown streams as we head towards the stratosphere >children below frolic in the mess falling from my anus >the g-force is causing my asscheeks to flap vigorously and create a gale >spaghetti and shit blowing through the air on the planet below >3 miles upwards now >Gamestop employee has died from lack of oxygen, his body falls to the surface below and is shredded by the force of my shit >my transformation is almost complete >as I leave the atmosphere my bear hands sprout and my tail grows, acting as a rudder >steer myself across the comsos with my gleaming shit and spaghetti trail
Fuck you, but also thanks. ---
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches your watch.