LogFAQs > #976883471

80. Slaughterhouse Rulez (Starz)

I kept seeing this movie appearing when I was searching for something to watch, and the thumbnail didn't match the summary for it at all. It just showed some blonde in a nurse outfit and I was so god damn confused. Well, it turns out that blonde was Margot Robbie and she was in the movie for no more than 2 minutes via Zoom call. I respect the marketing.

Slaughterhouse Rulez is about a bunch of kids at a boarding school in England and then a fracking excavation unleashes monsters from underground.

This movie is a comedy that is just not funny. There's a few funny moments, but they all come from Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, and Michael Sheen. Mostly Michael Sheen though. That man is funny as hell. But unfortunately, these three are all very much side characters in this movie. So instead we have to watch sophomoric frat jokes for the majority of the run time.

It's just not funny and it tries so hard to be. And I didn't care about the characters at all. And I didn't really get invested in a single plot thread they wove aside from maybe one. But overall, it's just not interesting at all. And the movie takes 45 minutes to get to a point where the real plot progresses somewhere meaningful.

And it's just weird dog mole monsters which are... fine, I guess. But the whole horror stuff just feels so derivative and like any sort of monster movie you've seen like this. They did maybe one or two cool things with the monsters, but outside of that it's just generic monster stuff with varying levels of quality with the effects.

Slaughterhouse Rulez isn't a good horror comedy unless maybe you're in that age group, but I find it hard to imagine I would have found it funny when I was younger either. Not really worth a watch. Would have been much better if the movie just followed around Michael Sheen the whole time instead.

Rating: 2/10