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TopicBoard 8 Watches and Ranks 80s Horror - The Rankings
Snake5555555555
04/12/24 8:35:00 PM
#275:


That being said, like a lot of the movies on this list, I do appreciate a fun climax. Granted, the Lost Boys climax comes on pretty quickly when the Coreys and their hit squad take out Bill S. Preston, Esquire, and then have to Home Alone their house to defend against vampires. But still, it is fun to watch a vampire get shoved into a bathtub full of garlic and holy water, and another vampire gets shot via arrow into a stereo system. Plus, Keifer Sutherland is a smug douche, so seeing him get impaled on taxidermy horns was satisfying as well. And also, to be completely fair, I like the concept of a half-vampire struggling not to lose himself, and to fight back against the peer pressure of his alleged sire. It adds a little more complexity than if Haim was just trying to fight back against vampires like a spunky pre-teen. Ultimately though, this is a middling film for me, and I think this placement reflects that.

Plasmabeam - I had a college professor who said this was her all-time favorite movie. Never understood the hype then, and I still dont understand it now.

Karo - So two teenage boys move to this fictional beachfront town in California that to put it mildly, is fucking ridiculous. It seems to be part ghetto, part circus, part hillbilly village, and all stupid.

But you see, this town has a small problem. It is terrorized by a biker gang made out of the absolute worst kind of bikers - vampire bikers!

The older boy gets turned into a vampire thanks to being stupid enough to drink vampire blood from people who already tried to feed him maggots and worms, and his brother gets the help of these stupid teen vampire hunters who are annoying and impossible to take seriously and they all confront the undead horde in a climax featuring a lot of stupidity and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

There is an almost forced sense of cheesiness that permeates the entire film. For such things to work they need to develop organically, here it just feels like they are trying too hard to create a bad cult movie and only succeeding at the bad part.

Regardless, it is a forgettable piece of dreck that should have stayed as lost as these boys.

Seginustemple - All style and no story, but how about that style? Not much of a horror but certainly 80's, it remains engaging as a pop culture time-capsule. You got the two Coreys hamming it up, the garish colors vs. black leather fashion statements, the iconic bodybuilder saxophonist (I still believe!) There's one scene in a neon video store that's like pure, uncut nostalgia. I think where it runs into problems is in trying to straddle two lanes, the kid-friendly Goonies adventure and the more adult wrong-side-of-the-tracks story, and it comes across as tonally at odds with itself. Jason Patric strikes me as a weak link as well, someone more compelling in that lead role would go a long way.

Rockus - I was never a big fan of The Lost Boys and I always preferred Near Dark as my 80s vampire film of choice in which a young man searching for a place to belong gets wrapped up with a gang of counterculture vampire delinquents. But revisiting this its better than I remembered. The first hour of it has a nice 80s music video soft looking fog machine heavy aesthetic that carries a lot of its visuals and makes it look a lot better than I remembered. The Coreys stuff is not great though, and Feldman trying to put on a deep voice the whole time is kind of embarrassing. The twist climax is a bit of a cop-out but I suppose it works if you dont think about it too much. The bathroom vampire kill is the best part of that final sequence, gnarly stuff, almost makes up for how lame the Coreys were in the rest of the movie.

Snake - Eh, I dont know, this one just never really clicked for me. If I was ranking it on the soundtrack alone, its a 10. But unfortunately, the rest of the movie is there. Okay, thats a bit harsh - the initial set-up is promising, but the plot quickly gets bogged down in teenage angst and goofy antics. All the characters are the annoying side of campy and the two protagonists are so stereotypical and one-note. When Kiefer Sutherland is on screen though, then the film suddenly comes alive with his delightful blend of menace and charm. Maybe you had to be there but The Lost Boys just doesnt really resonate with me much at all.

Jcgamer107 - 2/10

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