Current Events > so I found out my mother smokes cigarettes

(+) Yeah! (+)

I don't know how long she has been doing it but she goes outside when I'm inside and does it. I am worried she'll eventually die from it. She says she will stop but I don't believe her what should I do?
---

Superlinkbro posted...

I don't know how long she has been doing it but she goes outside when I'm inside and does it. I am worried she'll eventually die from it. She says she will stop but I don't believe her what should I do?

Tell her you're worried and then let her make her own adult decisions.
---

Carlbertomfg posted...

Superlinkbro posted...

I don't know how long she has been doing it but she goes outside when I'm inside and does it. I am worried she'll eventually die from it. She says she will stop but I don't believe her what should I do?

Tell her you're worried and then let her make her own adult decisions.

I don't want her to die from it, she does a lot for the family.
---

I think my bosses boss smokes too. Sometimes I can smell it when she comes to me.
---

Superlinkbro posted...

Carlbertomfg posted...

Superlinkbro posted...

I don't know how long she has been doing it but she goes outside when I'm inside and does it. I am worried she'll eventually die from it. She says she will stop but I don't believe her what should I do?

Tell her you're worried and then let her make her own adult decisions.

I don't want her to die from it, she does a lot for the family.

So tell her how it makes you feel and if she wants to enjoy a sin stick so be it.
---

Carlbertomfg posted...

Superlinkbro posted...

Carlbertomfg posted...

Superlinkbro posted...

I don't know how long she has been doing it but she goes outside when I'm inside and does it. I am worried she'll eventually die from it. She says she will stop but I don't believe her what should I do?

Tell her you're worried and then let her make her own adult decisions.

I don't want her to die from it, she does a lot for the family.

So tell her how it makes you feel and if she wants to enjoy a sin stick so be it.

I let her know how I felt, I'm sure she'll quit, hopefully
---

About 50% of people who smoke, die early as a result. I don't have the in-depth details, but I'd assume that heavier smokers are more strongly represented in this 50% than lighter smokers; and I'd also acknowledge that "die early" could mean anything from "they died an hour sooner than they might've otherwise" to "they die before their 5th birthday" (exaggeration at both extremes, but you get the point) - likely, much more of it being towards the less severe end of that scale.

Then, think about how a lot of old people end up living anyway these days - basically bored shitless and drugged up in a retirement home, unable to really do much for anyone.

Is it really that big a deal to you that your mother might get a few less years of that life, just because she chose to do something she enjoys?

(Now, on the other hand, if the smoking is having a financial impact on her or her family, that's a different matter and indeed quitting - or switching to vaping, which is much cheaper - should be strongly considered.)
---

DarkTransient posted...

Is it really that big a deal to you that your mother might get a few less years of that life, just because she chose to do something she enjoys?

True, you make interesting points, but the fact she hid it from me kinda pissed me off a bit.

I think most people would rather live a happy life and have a silent death than have a lot of surgeries at the end.

I understand your other point about a retirement home and whatnot, but smoking could also possibly cause a very agonizing, painful death that I wouldn't want anyone to experience.
---

enjoy the time you have left with her. this is the best advice i can give as i lost both parents by the time i turned 31.

father due to a stroke that progressed too far
mom due to a supposed heart attack (she had breathing problems prior).
---

kingdrake2 posted...

enjoy the time you have left with her. this is the best advice i can give as i lost both parents by the time i turned 31.

father due to a stroke that progressed too far
mom due to a supposed heart attack (she had breathing problems prior).

I'm really sorry to hear that. I couldn't imagine going through something like that

She seems like she'll stop and that's all I could ask for.
---

Superlinkbro posted...

I understand your other point about a retirement home and whatnot, but smoking could also possibly cause a very agonizing, painful death that I wouldn't want anyone to experience.

If she isn't already showing symptoms of dying of such an illness, I'd be willing to bet that voluntary euthanasia will be completely legal by the time she faces such a scenario. And very likely, even better symptom management than already exists (which isn't too shabby in the first place, even if far from perfect) will be around by then, too.
---

George Burns smoked cigars all the time and he lived to be 100.
---

KCJ5062 posted...

George Burns smoked cigars all the time and he lived to be 100.

And, the person who holds the world record for oldest confirmed age reached, was a smoker for most of her life (though not necesserially a heavy smoker).
---

honestly smoking cigarettes isn't gonna kill you as badly as those tv ads make you think.

now obvioulsy if she smoked 2-3 packs a day for 20 years, yeah she's doomed. but dont freak out TC. just tell her you dont like it. the shame might be enough to stop her. i dont smoke anymore because i couldn't stand my students saying i smell like their dad/uncle/karate teacher (whom i assume smoke too)
---

KCJ5062 posted...

George Burns smoked cigars all the time and he lived to be 100.

he was lucky or he had a set of really good genes.
---

kingdrake2 posted...

KCJ5062 posted...

George Burns smoked cigars all the time and he lived to be 100.

he was lucky or he had a set of really good genes.

Probably not a heavy smoker, plus, cigar smokers tend to not fully inhale the smoke, which means they're more likely to get annoying-but-not-fatal oral conditions, than more-dangerous lung conditions.
---