Current Events > Kinda wish I wasn't such a perv

(+) Yeah! (+)

Seems like a silly thing to complain about.

Im 28, but feel like Im 14.

I cant help but check out every moderately attractive woman. Doesnt matter if theyre younger than me(18+), or theyre 40+.

I mean I can hold eye contact during a conversation, but as soon as they leave, Im staring them up and down. Or trying to get a quick glimpse of cleavage, which I know is wrong.

I fap multiple times a week, sometimes twice a day.
My s/o and I have very different sex drives.

I feel gross admitting this, but I literally cant stop myself from looking sometimes. Unless I physically turn my whole body around.
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Get on ssri, it lowers your perviness, I know.

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i feel the same way, and i've only been feeling this for the past year or so

especially since working out

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Hot girls are hot

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As soon as you leave they're checking out your massive donk though so it evens out
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Veggeta_MAX posted...

Hot girls are hot

They dont even have to be hot. Could be incredibly average and Im still gonna drool.

Parappa09 posted...

i feel the same way, and i've only been feeling this for the past year or so

especially since working out

I dont workout much anymore, but theres probably an increase in testosterone!
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As long as you're not being open and creepy about it, it doesn't have to be a bad thing in of itself. If you're on the other hand addicted to porn or having other negative effects, you could try and work on reducing those problem symptoms and figure out how to harness and redirect your feelings.

I feel like I'm the same way but my actions and behavior towards others don't necessarily reflect my inner feelings because I use self control and my morals to guide what I decide to do or not to do. But sure, get me in a group of pervy gentlemen and I'll participate in area code ratings, wwyd scenarios if you're single type conversation, etc etc.

Also I'd recommend things like meditation and internalized self improvement over external methods like drugs.
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I wish i was pervy
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for me, this happens in the gym.

The gym has tons of hot women. It's hard to not look or stare at times
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It doesn't go away either.

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emblem boy posted...

for me, this happens in the gym.

The gym has tons of hot women. It's hard to not look or stare at times

Its way more understandable in that setting imo. Nothing but spandex, form fitting clothes, etc

Plus your juices are flowing.

Holy_Pumpkin posted...

As long as you're not being open and creepy about it, it doesn't have to be a bad thing in of itself. If you're on the other hand addicted to porn or having other negative effects, you could try and work on reducing those problem symptoms and figure out how to harness and redirect your feelings.

I feel like I'm the same way but my actions and behavior towards others don't necessarily reflect my inner feelings because I use self control and my morals to guide what I decide to do or not to do. But sure, get me in a group of pervy gentlemen and I'll participate in area code ratings, wwyd scenarios if you're single type conversation, etc etc.

Also I'd recommend things like meditation and internalized self improvement over external methods like drugs.

Never really tried meditation, but Im not opposed to it.

Are you just trying to be blank during, or are you working through something mentally
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Hey if they wanna flaunt it, they better expect our eyes all up on it
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Drumiester posted...

Hey if they wanna flaunt it, they better expect our eyes all up on it

They arent always flaunting tho. Like if a girl wears a cardigan just long enough to cover her ass, Im gonna check to see if the cheeks are poking out from the bottom.

Even though shes probably wearing it to cover that up
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Hairistotle posted...

dont you feel shame for ogling unsuspecting people

Sometimes yeah. But it doesnt seem to stop me.
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It's alright TC. Sometimes I see a girl and think "Man. I want to suck that ass"
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Touch posted...

It's alright TC. Sometimes I see a girl and think "Man. I want to suck that ass"

Are there some that don't have those thoughts?
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Hairistotle posted...

so like you literally just have no control over yourself? or you just dont care?

Enough control that Im not just staring for minutes straight. But since looking is victimless, I dont care enough not to look? Im not really sure how to describe it.

As I mentioned before, I know its gross.
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lww99 posted...

emblem boy posted...

for me, this happens in the gym.

The gym has tons of hot women. It's hard to not look or stare at times

Its way more understandable in that setting imo. Nothing but spandex, form fitting clothes, etc

Plus your juices are flowing.

Holy_Pumpkin posted...

As long as you're not being open and creepy about it, it doesn't have to be a bad thing in of itself. If you're on the other hand addicted to porn or having other negative effects, you could try and work on reducing those problem symptoms and figure out how to harness and redirect your feelings.

I feel like I'm the same way but my actions and behavior towards others don't necessarily reflect my inner feelings because I use self control and my morals to guide what I decide to do or not to do. But sure, get me in a group of pervy gentlemen and I'll participate in area code ratings, wwyd scenarios if you're single type conversation, etc etc.

Also I'd recommend things like meditation and internalized self improvement over external methods like drugs.

Never really tried meditation, but Im not opposed to it.

Are you just trying to be blank during, or are you working through something mentally

I don't want to come off as a credible source as I haven't really meditated myself I've just looked into the benefits and done some research on it and want to incorporate it into my own life eventually. That said, from what I understand the blankness is the end goal but you don't reach that by trying to be blank literally (that's why you can repeat mantras or hums to assist in getting to the blank state). It's better if I explain by example.

Let's say you're in a house where you can still hear the birds outside chirping. You would close your eyes and relax yourself into a state where as thoughts come into your mind, you let them go as soon as they come. Your day sucked for example, and you think about you. You don't simply try to prevent the thought from occurring, but rather accept that it has come to your mind and then let it pass without further thought. You repeat this with any stimuli that happens, whether internal (your own thoughts) or external (the birds chirping outside). You hear the birds chirp, and then you let it go. If you do it right, after an extended period of time you'll have tuned out the internal thoughts and external stimuli, to the point where you "hear" and think nothing. And I suppose then, you're at a blank state. Once you achieve that, some mystical shit is suppose to happen and you can tap into a different realm of consciousness if you believe that. Regardless of whether or not you want that or experience that, the practice itself supposed to be therapeutic and you're honing a skill that can translate into practical use in your actual life. You're training your mind to will itself into a peaceful state that is not easy to attain.
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It's called being a man. Welcome.

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Holy_Pumpkin posted...

lww99 posted...

emblem boy posted...

for me, this happens in the gym.

The gym has tons of hot women. It's hard to not look or stare at times

Its way more understandable in that setting imo. Nothing but spandex, form fitting clothes, etc

Plus your juices are flowing.

Holy_Pumpkin posted...

As long as you're not being open and creepy about it, it doesn't have to be a bad thing in of itself. If you're on the other hand addicted to porn or having other negative effects, you could try and work on reducing those problem symptoms and figure out how to harness and redirect your feelings.

I feel like I'm the same way but my actions and behavior towards others don't necessarily reflect my inner feelings because I use self control and my morals to guide what I decide to do or not to do. But sure, get me in a group of pervy gentlemen and I'll participate in area code ratings, wwyd scenarios if you're single type conversation, etc etc.

Also I'd recommend things like meditation and internalized self improvement over external methods like drugs.

Never really tried meditation, but Im not opposed to it.

Are you just trying to be blank during, or are you working through something mentally

I don't want to come off as a credible source as I haven't really meditated myself I've just looked into the benefits and done some research on it and want to incorporate it into my own life eventually. That said, from what I understand the blankness is the end goal but you don't reach that by trying to be blank literally (that's why you can repeat mantras or hums to assist in getting to the blank state). It's better if I explain by example.

Let's say you're in a house where you can still hear the birds outside chirping. You would close your eyes and relax yourself into a state where as thoughts come into your mind, you let them go as soon as they come. Your day sucked for example, and you think about you. You don't simply try to prevent the thought from occurring, but rather accept that it has come to your mind and then let it pass without further thought. You repeat this with any stimuli that happens, whether internal (your own thoughts) or external (the birds chirping outside). You hear the birds chirp, and then you let it go. If you do it right, after an extended period of time you'll have tuned out the internal thoughts and external stimuli, to the point where you "hear" and think nothing. And I suppose then, you're at a blank state. Once you achieve that, some mystical shit is suppose to happen and you can tap into a different realm of consciousness if you believe that. Regardless of whether or not you want that or experience that, the practice itself supposed to be therapeutic and you're honing a skill that can translate into practical use in your actual life. You're training your mind to will itself into a peaceful state that is not easy to attain.

Thanks for the info, Ill give this a shot.

Always been curious about meditation, not really for this situation though
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Np, good luck bud!
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Touch posted...

It's alright TC. Sometimes I see a girl and think "Man. I want to suck that ass"

is dat coz of jealousy?

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Doesnt happen often at all, like maybe twice ever... but its gotten bad enough that Ive needed to lock myself in the bathroom at work, and take care of business.

Pretty damn bad. I know this isnt normal.

Its been a long time, as I realized its not worth losing my job.
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Hairistotle posted...

hey tc sorry if i made you feel bad with my earlier posts. i was bein real pissy

Youre good, I didnt take anything personally.
They were legitimate questions
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Every man is like this. Just some are in denial or have more control over it than others >_> We're all pussyhounds deep down.
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also it doesn't help when you have a manager at work who is equally pervy, and we both eye up the hot guys in our office and use skype at work to chat about it

...actually it's p fun lol

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Parappa09 posted...

also it doesn't help when you have a manager at work who is equally pervy, and we both eye up the hot guys in our office and use skype at work to chat about it

...actually it's p fun lol

Fair enough lmao. Yeah my co worker is only a couple years older than me, so were usually gawking together
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Hate to have ya go, but i love to watch you leave
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JustMyOpinion posted...

Sounds about right for the guy who got warned (or was it suspended) for denying male rape.

Lol keep thinking thats what happened.
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also hot straight guys are my kryptonite so i bet i'm more of a perv lol

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Parappa09 posted...

also hot straight guys are my kryptonite so i bet i'm more of a perv lol

Fair enough lol. Probably makes it more of a challenge too, almost like an added game to it.

Wanting people who are unavailable for whatever reason
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lww99 posted...

Fair enough lol. Probably makes it more of a challenge too, almost like an added game to it.

Wanting people who are unavailable for whatever reason

kinda i guess, but it's just that i'm more attracted to masculine guys. i would say 90% of guys i crush on or find attractive are straight

fml

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Lol my husband is 47 and hes still a horn dog. We laugh about it all the time. The other day some girls were waking by us in cut off shorts with their ass cheeks hanging out. It was like his brain got instantly took over as he stared, mouth open.

lww99 posted...

JustMyOpinion posted...

Sounds about right for the guy who got warned (or was it suspended) for denying male rape.

Lol keep thinking thats what happened.

why he do this, the man gets held down by the woman and forced through intimidation to give her his fertilizer ><.
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Cleo_II posted...

Lol my husband is 47 and hes still a horn dog. We laugh about it all the time. The other day some girls were waking by us in cut off shorts with their ass cheeks hanging out. It was like his brain got instantly took over as he stared, mouth open.

Lmao nice, glad you both get a kick out of it.

Is his sex drive way higher? Or are you two pretty much on the same page? (If you dont mind me asking)

If not, how do you guys deal with the difference?

Parappa09 posted...

lww99 posted...

Fair enough lol. Probably makes it more of a challenge too, almost like an added game to it.

Wanting people who are unavailable for whatever reason

kinda i guess, but it's just that i'm more attracted to masculine guys. i would say 90% of guys i crush on or find attractive are straight

fml

Ahh I gotcha. I see a lot of fit gay guys around here, maybe not masculine, but fit.

Do you try to find people at the gym? Or just online/social gatherings?
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lww99 posted...

Lmao nice, glad you both get a kick out of it.

Is his sex drive way higher? Or are you two pretty much on the same page? (If you dont mind me asking)

If not, how do you guys deal with the difference?

Mines around medium while his is very high. Usually have sex 2-3 times a week. There are times where Im not in the mood and he is, so well just have a quickie. I try not to turn him down sexually, unless I feel absolutely awful in which case he doesnt really initiate anyway. Ive probably turned him down like twice in our entire 9 years together.

Sorry for the personal question, I appreciate the answer.

That seems like the perfect situation lol.
My fiancs is very low, like we might have sex 1-3 times a month. Something always seems to get in the way, unfortunately.

I dont expect her to if she feels like shes on her deathbed, but its literally always something.

Shes tired, work was stressful, doesnt feel well, too close to her cycle, etc.

Used to be way more often, not sure what happened. Shes only 25, so its not like her sex drive should have fallen off completely.
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Try being a college student at the most populated university in the country. You have basically no choice
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AwesomeToTheMAX posted...

Try being a college student at the most populated university in the country. You have basically no choice

College kids are naturally pervy. Hormones are still going wild at that age. Everyones usually hammered too
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lww99 posted...

Sorry for the personal question, I appreciate the answer.

That seems like the perfect situation lol.
My fiancs is very low, like we might have sex 1-3 times a month. Something always seems to get in the way, unfortunately.

I dont expect her to if she feels like shes on her deathbed, but its literally always something.

Shes tired, work was stressful, doesnt feel well, too close to her cycle, etc.

Used to be way more often, not sure what happened. Shes only 25, so its not like her sex drive should have fallen off completely.

this is bad signs for the unfaithful :( not saying he will but they sometimes cheat when it's lacking in the sex department.
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kingdrake2 posted...

lww99 posted...

Sorry for the personal question, I appreciate the answer.

That seems like the perfect situation lol.
My fiancs is very low, like we might have sex 1-3 times a month. Something always seems to get in the way, unfortunately.

I dont expect her to if she feels like shes on her deathbed, but its literally always something.

Shes tired, work was stressful, doesnt feel well, too close to her cycle, etc.

Used to be way more often, not sure what happened. Shes only 25, so its not like her sex drive should have fallen off completely.

this is bad signs for the unfaithful :( not saying he will but they sometimes cheat when it's lacking in the sex department.

Shes one of the only gfs Ive had, that Ive never worried about that with. Not saying its impossible, but highly unlikely.

She doesnt even really masturbate anymore
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lww99 posted...

Sorry for the personal question, I appreciate the answer.

That seems like the perfect situation lol.
My fiancs is very low, like we might have sex 1-3 times a month. Something always seems to get in the way, unfortunately.

I dont expect her to if she feels like shes on her deathbed, but its literally always something.

Shes tired, work was stressful, doesnt feel well, too close to her cycle, etc.

Used to be way more often, not sure what happened. Shes only 25, so its not like her sex drive should have fallen off completely.

Is she on the pill? I noticed a huge difference in my libido when I got off it.

Cleo_II posted...

lww99 posted...

Sorry for the personal question, I appreciate the answer.

That seems like the perfect situation lol.
My fiancs is very low, like we might have sex 1-3 times a month. Something always seems to get in the way, unfortunately.

I dont expect her to if she feels like shes on her deathbed, but its literally always something.

Shes tired, work was stressful, doesnt feel well, too close to her cycle, etc.

Used to be way more often, not sure what happened. Shes only 25, so its not like her sex drive should have fallen off completely.

Is she on the pill? I noticed a huge difference in my libido when I got off it.

Na, she cant any form of BC, for a variety of reasons
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lww99 posted...

Na, she cant any form of BC, for a variety of reasons

Have you talked to her about it? My ex had low libido too and that can be really damaging to a relationship if youre mismatched.

Also, do you two still date? Like weekly date nights?

Cleo_II posted...

lww99 posted...

Na, she cant any form of BC, for a variety of reasons

Have you talked to her about it? My ex had low libido too and that can be really damaging to a relationship if youre mismatched.

Also, do you two still date? Like weekly date nights?

Yeah, we usually try to go out once a week. It can be hard since we work different schedules, but usually at least once.

Weve talked about it at length, numerous times. Never seems to change anything.

Its very damaging though. Like I almost resent her at times, because of it. And me getting pissed about it just pushes her further away.

I dont expect her to bend over every time I say, but you gotta help your partner out. I dont think Ive EVER turned her down.

When it actually happens, we have great sex. But its just so inconsistent.
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