Current Events > AMA about dementia diseases and taking care of people with dementia diseases.

(+) Yeah! (+)

It's what I do for a living.

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The ones I take care of haven't gotten to that point yet. Hope they don't

So yeah I didn't really ask you anything, and I don't know why I'm here

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Smackems posted...

The ones I take care of haven't gotten to that point yet. Hope they don't

So yeah I didn't really ask you anything, and I don't know why I'm here

You take care of the elderly? I can still answer questions about that if you want to ask. I've taken care of the elderly since 2004.

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I do indeed. I feel immense empathy for them. I mostly take care of elderly family but I have others I see after as well

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Are they all mean? Television has shown me that they're all mean but I feel like if I couldn't remember shit very well I'd just accept whatever anybody told me and be pretty docile.

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Smackems posted...

I do indeed. I feel immense empathy for them. I mostly take care of elderly family but I have others I see after as well

If you have any questions, just ask, I have a lot of experience and knowledge about the elderly.

Jiek_Fafn posted...

Are they all mean? Television has shown me that they're all mean but I feel like if I couldn't remember shit very well I'd just accept whatever anybody told me and be pretty docile.

Nah, most of the time when they have aggression or mean behavior it's because they don't feel safe in their environment they are in, which can be very hard to decipher. For example, could be some kind of pain, but they can't express that so it becomes aggression. Or they can't grasp the different senses that are stimulated so they act mean and with aggression. One of the hardest parts of out job is to decipher what they actually feel and need for support.

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How important is not shitting your pants?

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R1masher posted...

How important is not shitting your pants?

You talking about tc or the patients

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How to cope with your grandma thanking your your dead Grandpa?

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Smackems posted...

You talking about tc or the patients

the patients, but tc too

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My grandmother had dementia before she passed; and she was the nicest lady I knew in my life up until she started shoving other patients in the hospital (seemingly for no reason). Is that normal?

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R1masher posted...

How important is not shitting your pants?

Most of they ones we take care of doesn't since they can still handle that themselves. I work in home care but only for people that have dementia diseaes (meaning they don't live in any facility or something, in their own homes). But of course it can happen.

ZeroX91 posted...

How to cope with your grandma thanking your your dead Grandpa?

I don't get this question

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SolidShadow3 posted...

My grandmother had dementia before she passed; and she was the nicest lady I knew in my life up until she started shoving other patients in the hospital (seemingly for no reason). Is that normal?

Aggression is not uncommon, it can be usually handled with right strategy, but sometimes it can be almost impossible. It's never really anything they do on purpose, it's usually some kind of frustration they have because they don't understand something cuz of lack of different cognitive abilites, it's only natural to become aggresive then.

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How to deal with unwanted advances from demitia grandma who thinks im my grandpa?

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ZeroX91 posted...

How to deal with unwanted advances demitia grandma?

Always mark that's it's not appropriate. But don't do it in a condescending or aggressive way. Say no and step away.

EDIT: I saw the edited context. It's more hard for you then her really. Depending on the situation you can also just ignore it and try to distract her in other way when it happens. Try to avoid to make her feel what she is doing wrong and shameful.
a
My advice first was if you were a caretaker which is not family. But for family it's different advice.

Either way, it's still a very difficutly situation and you can't really do everthing 100% corrent whethere you are a caretaker or family.

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Actually @ZeroX91 has a good question:

My grandmother once forgot her husband (step grandfather) died; my aunt blatantly told her "Bob is dead." What would you say is a better way of handling that?

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SolidShadow3 posted...

Actually @ZeroX91 has a good question:

My grandmother once forgot her husband (step grandfather) died; my aunt blatantly told her "Bob is dead." What would you say is a better way of handling that?

Depending on how much they can remember. One strategy is to make them remember. For example if a woman starts to ask me where her husband is and why he isn't home (and he died many years ago). I can start to ask stuff like, "oh, wasn't he in the hospital etc", like with conversation you lead them into rememebring what happend, many times I have succeded this, and it's much betteer than shocking them with their loved ones death. Even if you have to do this like 5 times a day it's worth it, but exhausting. But sometimes even this doesn't work, sometimes you can just try to change the subject and they forget that they even asked it.

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btw sorry for my bad spelling and stuff, cba to correct them, I hope you still understand what I mean

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FF_Redux posted...

Depending on how much they can remember. One strategy is to make them remember. For example if a woman starts to ask me where her husband is and why he isn't home (and he died many years ago). I can start to ask stuff like, "oh, wasn't he in the hospital etc", like with conversation you lead them into rememebring what happend, many times I have succeded this, and it's much betteer than shocking them with their loved ones death. Even if you have to do this like 5 times a day it's worth it, but exhausting. But sometimes even this doesn't work, sometimes you can just try to change the subject and they forget that they even asked it.

Thank you. Everyone was pissed at her that night, but no one knew how better to handle it so we let it go, but made me realize I should probably learn for the future.

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SolidShadow3 posted...

Thank you. Everyone was pissed at her that night, but no one knew how better to handle it so we let it go, but made me realize I should probably learn for the future.

I understand that, it's one of the hardest dieases for the next of kin, family and friends to handle. It can devastate the best of families. It's so heartbreaking. One of the most important parts of my job is to be support for the people close to the patient. And it's okay to feel pissed, angry, sad, obligated, disappointed and everything, but as long as you can try to get these feelings on someone else other than the person that has the disease it's the best thing.

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