Current Events > Video game logic

(+) Yeah! (+)

Chasing someone through a dungeon but all the traps are still active even though they ostensibly are just ahead of you.
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DevsBro posted...

*has two full clips*
*shoots half a clip*
*reloads*
*shoots half a clip*
*reloads*
*has one full clip*

I recall that during the Battlefield 3 Beta, they actually tested out where you would lose the rest of the clip if you reloaded before you were out

They obviously changed it, probably because people complained. It was very hard for me personally to get used to the fact that you would lose all that ammo by reloading.
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Enemies around the place you were raised are the weakest in the world, and they get stronger the father away you travel.
Same with equipment cost & quality and quest rewards.
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stone posted...

Same with equipment cost & quality and quest rewards.

This is especially silly when you start in the largest city in the country/world which you'd think would have access to more/better gear.
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*breaks into a house*
*steals stuff*
*runs into the resident*
"I love to listen to the sea on days like today."
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Raid ancient tomb, untouched for hundreds of years, find parts to upgrade your machine gun.

Combine bottles, gasoline and cloth to make lit Molotov. Still need gas for lighter to solve puzzle.

Train is rapidly approaching dead end, needs two people on each end of the train to activate the emergency brakes.

Open doors by fucking around with the electric grid.

Combine shotgun with spare parts, suddenly becomes different type and make of shotgun.

Can you tell I like RE games?
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evilpresident posted...

Combine bottles, gasoline and cloth to make lit Molotov. Still need gas for lighter to solve puzzle.

To add to this, lit molotov never explodes until you throw it or light explosive but then change weapons the fuse then goes out and returns to its unlit length.
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*lights a molotov*
*puts it back in pocket*
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Combine random herbs to make antidote for giant mutated spider bites.

Turn flashlight off, monsters can't see you anymore.

Either take shotgun and 60 shells or one puzzle piece and a key.
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In Rainbow Six 3, you could blast a wooden door into splinters by emptying an AK-47 mag onto it.
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DreadedWave posted...

stone posted...

Same with equipment cost & quality and quest rewards.

This is especially silly when you start in the largest city in the country/world which you'd think would have access to more/better gear.

And saving the princess as one of your first missions gives shittier rewards than saving some little girl's cat in endgame.
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Giant God monster, eternal and all powerful. Dies from getting hit in the kneecap several times.
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Dungeon locked , only one way in. Big bad still makes it to the end before you do.

I love this topic.
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Giant God monster, eternal and all powerful. Dies from getting hit in the kneecap several times.

Ok the kneecap part killed me because it's so accurate lol.
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Battle - get shot in the motherfucking face. 15 damage, walk it off.

Cutscene - get stabbed. Instantly dead forever.
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*evil team trying to take over the world*

*fucking 10 year old comes and beats them all individually in battles*

oh damn, guess we'll give you the passwords and keys

*beats the boss*

you beat me in a battle, guess our team will go away forever
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Enemy is still alive with only 0.000000000000001% of it's health.
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Oh no, a cutscene starts and a zombie/mutant/demon is coming towards me! Better forget about that magnum, shotgun and grenade launcher I have in my backpocket and slowly back myself into a corner!
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EbonTitanium posted...

Enemy is still alive with only 0.000000000000001% of it's health.

Everyone is always perfectly healthy so long as they still have life in their healthbar or at least 1HP, even if they've been shot 100+ times.
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>pull up scope in first-person
>entire screen zooms in instead of just what's visible through the scope
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>guarding bandit hideout
>take arrow to the head
>"is somebody there?"
>can't find attacker
>"must be my imagination"
>return to post with arrow still through skull
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There is an intruder in the base! We better stand right beside these red barrels of flammable stuff!
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"He's dead Jim. Took a tank shell straight to the chest."

"Not on my watch, dammit! Get me the shock paddles!"
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"Hello total stranger, would you like to resolve my life long moral dilemma?"

"I don't like you very much because I can sense your karma meter is too low"

"Hmm, would this kill me? Let's try it out and reload if it does"

"Hey there, I'm a random herbivore. I see you're fighting my natural predator, a terrifying beast that has devoured half my family. I could run away. I could hide. I could help you. But instead imma fuck you up boy."
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Incoming


















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90% accuracy
Miss every time


Crap, I'm going the right way!

It matters not how well you destroy a boss. The cutscene after will inform you that you are out of breath, at the end of your ropes while the enemy is smug and unphased.

Enemy monster covered in 1000s of scales.
30% percent chance of a single scale dropping after.

Dialogue choice to side with person A. Dialogue choice to side with person B. No dialogue choice to stay the fuck out of the argument you weren't even a part of.
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Spidey5 posted...

Enemy monster covered in 1000s of scales.
30% percent chance of a single scale dropping after.

This is Monster Hunter in a nutshell.

"Hmm, I need two Deviljho tails. Hey, I cut off a Deviljho tail. I'm going to carve...a scale off of it. And...another scale. What the fuck?"
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stone posted...

Enemies around the place you were raised are the weakest in the world, and they get stronger the father away you travel.
Same with equipment cost & quality and quest rewards.

This always bugs the hell out of me but nowhere more so than in FFXI where the Beastmen right next to the nation capitals are the weakest things in the world and yet no one dies anything about them while they're off murdering citizens.


I give wild animals and junk a pass since they're left alone because they're docile or not a threat but the Beastmen make no sense.
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You defeated the wild dog! Wild dog dropped 23 gold and a sword of smiting +1!

Why the hell is the wild dog carrying gold and weapons with it? It doesn't even have thumbs! What does it do, carry the gold in its mouth?
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Falls to death because of a change in the camera angle.
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A diamond! *rushes towards it*

Hey, where'd it go? It vanished just before I could get it.
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*Beats a boss using your best weqpon, equipment, and skills/specials*
*Next cutscene: "Not bad. Now let me show you what true power is!"*
*Kills you in one hit*

*Party member dies in story*
*Revive item doesn't bring them back to life*

*Drifting fills boost meter/builds mini turbo*
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*all of your allied forces work together to take down this incredibly strong foe and complete the mission*
*foe joins your team*
*next mission he is the weakest force among all of your allies*


Greatest warrior of them all has arrived on the battle field.
"Greatest warrior is in danger!! Provide assistance fast!"
*Greatest warrior is being held up by a single mook*


"Do not hide in the haystack"


Bonus points for getting that last one.
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*jumps off tallest building in Italy*
*lands in hay*
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DuranOfForcena posted...

>play a Fallout game
>almost die because of drowning in water
>regain health by drinking some water

This is a good one. So weird.

I always think of Dead Rising games for dumb logic.
>use restroom, die, start again at toilet/urinal
>drink too much booze or eat rotten food, start puking, walk through (loading) door, all better
>add duct tape jewels to flashlight and it becomes a laser sword
>shoot all but 1 bullet from gun, give to survivor, now infinite ammo, trade to get gun back, 1 bullet again
>magazines in inventory make vehicles and weapons more durable, foods heal more life, mixed drinks effects last longer, etc.

I could keep going, but the games are full of stupid logic and I'm not typing them all.
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Duct Tape / Foil = Sets off contraband detector
Contraband Pouch made of Duct Tape + Foil = A-Okay

*Gains insane amount of money in matter of seconds*
*Game doesn't care and counts it as legit*
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weapon_d00d816 posted...

7.62x51mm in an automatic weapon: "pew pew pew pew pew", 5 shot kill

7.62x51mm in a sniper rifle: "KA-BOOOOSH!", 1 shot kill

Even better:

5.56 mm round to the head: 1 shot kill

.50 bullet to the chest cavity: 2 shot kill minimum
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*shoots somebody in both legs and feet

*they continue to run perfectly
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Xelltrix posted...

This classic:

https://i.stack.imgur.com/uv3Wa.jpg

Lmfao

These are good. Keep them coming
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*character is dead*
"I'll bring him back to life with this feather!"

*character is dying*
"It's okay, pour this medicinal liquid down your throat, it will fix your missing legs no problem"

*character is dying after their character arc has just concluded*
"I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE TO FILL YOUR DARK SOUL WITH LIIIIIIGGGGHHTTT!"
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CensorErik posted...

>shoot all but 1 bullet from gun, give to survivor, now infinite ammo, trade to get gun back, 1 bullet again

...I loved this beating Halo games on Legendary solo :p use up a power weapon, give it to a Marine with one shot left. Keep your Marines alive.

Really takes the pressure off you walking into the bigger firefights when you've got a small horde of Marines with infinite ammo Spartan Lasers, Rocket Launchers, and Fuel Rod Cannons :p
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*Fights a boss that shoots spikes as a main weapon*
*gets hit by one and takes damage*
*Falls in a bed of spike*
*Blows up*
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*completely destroy a boss in-game*

*cutscene* "That was just a warm-up! Now time for the real fight!"

*leaves your character rekt*
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Ultra badass villain that can crush entire armies loses to a rag-tag group of plucky upstarts.
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Lose one weapon, guess what, you just lost all your weapons.
Walks around with a massive arsenal, but only one weapon is visible. (Hammerspace rule)
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Carry metal boots in bag? You can swim.
Wear metal boots in feet? You sink to the bottom of the ocean.
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