Current Events > How do you stop comparing yourself to others?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Topic.
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Become a hermit.
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By accepting that I'm a piece of shit and no one cares.
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you don't

realize that Amazon looks at their own quarterly profits to figure out how they're doing instead of looking at, say, Apple's
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UrCa1988 posted...

By accepting that I'm a piece of shit and no one cares.

This. There's definitely some peacefullness in not caring anymore
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I know this Jim who never compares himself to others, so I try to be like him, though I often fall short.
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JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

realize that Amazon looks at their own quarterly profits to figure out how they're doing instead of looking at, say, Apple's

No they don't. Amazon has terrible margins. They're not where they are because of their margins. I don't think you understand their business model.

swing and a miss
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All I'm hearing is "just stop".

If it were that easy I wouldn't do it.
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JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

realize that Amazon looks at their own quarterly profits to figure out how they're doing instead of looking at, say, Apple's

No they don't. Amazon has terrible margins. They're not where they are because of their margins. I don't think you understand their business model.

swing and a miss

Yes, your understanding of the Amazon model is a swing and a miss which detracts from the point you were trying to make. Don't blame your ignorance on others.

strike two
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JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

JustMyOpinion posted...

chill02 posted...

realize that Amazon looks at their own quarterly profits to figure out how they're doing instead of looking at, say, Apple's

No they don't. Amazon has terrible margins. They're not where they are because of their margins. I don't think you understand their business model.

swing and a miss

Yes, your understanding of the Amazon model is a swing and a miss which detracts from the point you were trying to make. Don't blame your ignorance on others.

strike two

And another shitpost from you. Just admit you don't understand how Amazon works instead of digging a deeper hole. It's sad.

strike three

analogies, how do they work
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Do the best you can

Have fun doing it
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I think it's by carving your own path and not trying to do exactly as everyone saw has in the past. Your life is your own, as unique you make it to be. No path worth following or comparing to than the one you're on.
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JustMyOpinion posted...

They work a lot better when you know what you're talking about and don't botch the delivery.

must be all that delicious Applebee's ice cream that's giving you brain freeze
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Want to know the trick?

Don't stop comparing yourself to others. Just do so contextually.

It's maladaptive if you're comparing yourself to impossible to meet standards. X, y, z is better off than me, smarter than me, richer than me, fitter than me, funnier than me, etc. Comparison is the theft of joy.

And comparing yourself to those "below" is just stroking that mental dick and being content with where you are at (for better or worse).

So here's the thing, compare yourself to people you'd like to be like. Role models are there for a reason. We channel their virtues, their temperament, their behaviors in order to improve ourselves. Fake it till you make it. But don't constantly compare yourself to your detriment. It's just a tool.

I can compare myself to some rock star peers in my field, and that might make me sad. Or I can reframe it that being average in a cohort of the top 1% academically is still a success in my book. And while I might compare myself to more seasoned superiors, it is only in the context of the type of doctor I want to be someday, not where I am now, because obviously I won't compare. They have 5, 10, 20, 30 years experience more than me.

This way I don't take it personally. I don't internalize it. I simply utilize it, as a frame of reference, so that I remain in touch with the world. If we didn't compare ourselves at least a little bit, we'd all be fuckin' weirdos.
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How are you comparing yourself to them?

If you're looking at people's "great" lives on Facebook/Instagram/whatever, just realize certain people will highlight their best and try to look happier than they really are. That awesome party pic where it looks like everyone was smiling and having an awesome time was taken in 2 seconds in that context and then they probably went back to just standing around being bored. In real life, some people also exaggerate their success. I know some guys who pretend to be rich, driving around fancy cars and doing cool shit, and then you learn they're thousands in debt and they have a shitty job.

It's easier said than done, but compare yourself only to yourself. You don't have to strive for instant success, but try to be a little bit better this year than you were last year. Make a little more money, save a little more money, read one or two more books, try out a new hobby, go to school again, try for a promotion or a raise, or switch to a better job, etc. When you see yourself improving, more people will be drawn to you and envy you instead of the other way around. You probably won't be a rich dude on a yacht sailing with 10 naked supermodels, but you'll be a happier and better person.

Soviet_Poland posted...

So here's the thing, compare yourself to people you'd like to be like.

I do that.

And then it kills my confidence and motivation, because I feel I'll never be on their level.
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