Current Events > is it bad that i am almost 24, and havent got life figured out yet?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Right now, i am pretty much just winging everything. Wake uo, go to work, get money.

I spend some, i save some, i invest some. I don't what i am gonna do next.

Never thought of having a family yet, or set a short term goals.

I do have a kinda long term goal. I just want to be financially secure enough to stuff that i love. I always like to open an indie game studio, but i would never want to make it my sole income/livelyhood.

I want it to be a passion thing, where a good profit is welcome, but if it financially fail, it is fine because i would make the game i like.

Other than that, nothing really. I just want a calm quiet life. I dont even know if i want a family. Maybe those paternal instincts will kick off when i hit late 20s and i would seek out to settle down. Maybe it never will. My irresponsibility wikl trump in the end.

I dunno. Feels like lots of people at my age have already it all figured out, i am just here, busy just existing.
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what does it even mean to have it "figured out" really
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the only thing that is constant in life is change. the people that i feel have "figured things out" are the ones i feel have adapted well to experiencing these changes as they come along
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nah no one's really got it figured out, and those that seem to are just copying what other people did or are on a path their parents set for them (like those that knew they wanted to be a doctor at like 16)

life is just about doing your own thing, and try to enjoy it when you can. society tries to get you to do things a certain way. I'm 28 and not married and don't have any kids, in some cultures I've been living wrong, but I don't see it that way
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Step 1 to "figuring things out" - do what you want to do and do not follow society's rules
Step 2 - enjoy the things you like
Step 3 - do the things you like
Step 4 - stop posting on gamefaqs
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Most 30 and 40 somethings are in the same situation. Just because they popped out a few dependents doesn't mean the "figured out" anything.

Blastia posted...

what does it even mean to have it "figured out" really

I guess what i meant is most people at this age alrrady set on the path of expectations that society dictate.

It basically, while i see people following the dogma "get a job, get a married, have a family, die" and at my age most people already set foot in that direction.

I never really wanted, tbh i am fine with being single forever, if that means i have freedom.

Maybe i am just that afraid of commitment and predictability. If anything, i am always bad at following rules and tradition. I am always a kinda deviant person, guess never got out of the rebellious phase.

I also find hard to bond with people really. Real bond. I am not bad in social situation, i can handle people, in most situation, but in personal relationship, I basically pretend that i care 90% of the time. Basically i keep relationship because i think they are useful. I care about then because i think they can give me something i need.

I always find it hard to relate and open to other people, to the point i am so comfortable with solitude, that it freaks me out to find people care so much about me, to the point it is almost unconditional.

I dunno. My problems arise from a complex mix of different things. I am too self aware, yet egotistical, maybe i overthink to much too. I am too proud, yet somehow insecure.

I see myself, and i see myself as this tangle of contradiction, hypocrisy, conflicting self interest and basically a mess.

I envy people that think simple. I overthink, i overanalyze and this post itself pretty much a representation of myself.

I dunno.
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the one thing I've realized when getting older is that people have no clue of what they're doing and they're mostly winging it
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chill02 posted...

the one thing I've realized when getting older is that people have no clue of what they're doing and they're mostly winging it

this.
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I play this little game earlier,

Basically i try to predict the best version of me that i could be. Also the worst kind.

I try to measure my real self to that 2 projections. On the scale of 0 which is the worst version of me
I picture myself as this lonely old bitter monster, totally apathetic about everything, violent, defeated by impulse and lack of self control. Likely rotting in prison because my anger episodes tend to get violent.

At my best, i see myself in the scale of 10 as a somewhat competent leader figure. Maybe still a bit detached and deviant, but able to use those things in positive, productive way. Put all my talents and hone them to perfection, basically become this multi tool, master jack of all trade that i often show sign of. I can easily learn new stuff and have a decent to good analytical skills, quite competent in most field.

I try to see myself now, and where the real me is on that scale. I think current me is 4 or 5.

I dunno, i still have those spark of brilliance and motivations that made me able to things i thought i can never do, at the same time, the chance to hone those skills basically lost in the vortex of apathy, lazyness, pride and all of my other insecurities.
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I am currently in a state where I ask myself "what am i living for?" so I kind of see what you're saying in your last post.

If you want to improve your person, just focus on only comparing yourself to the past version of yourself. Don't let society dictate anything in your mind and just live for yourself. Improve the skills you want to improve. Be the person you want to be.

I am trying to find new hobbies or something to do after work besides get high and play video games. I am trying to figure out who I want to be outside of work, but am having difficulty finding what I really like to do.
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nothing 2 figure out tbqh. get a job to sustain yourself everything after that doesn't matter
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apolloooo posted...

Wake up, go to work, get money.

Congrats, you have life figured out.
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No one has life figured out. Anyone who says they have is a liar. Doesn't matter if you're 24 or 84.
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krazychao5 posted...

If you want to improve your person, just focus on only comparing yourself to the past version of yourself. Don't let society dictate anything in your mind and just live for yourself. Improve the skills you want to improve. Be the person you want to be.

yeah, this is great advice
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There are people who make it all the way to dying at 80 without ever figuring it out
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I dunno, i still have those spark of brilliance and motivations that made me able to things i thought i can never do, at the same time, the chance to hone those skills basically lost in the vortex of apathy, lazyness, pride and all of my other insecurities.

This is exactly how I feel except replace apathy with anxiety and depression. I got my blue belt in jiu-jitsu this year and wrote 4 books but I can't enjoy any of it because I'm a mess.
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Blastia posted...

what does it even mean to have it "figured out" really

Just understand that live is loving then dying.

im 34 and I just wing it other than living by the words of the wu tang clan with a firm belief in C.R.E.A.M.
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You'll probably never be satisfied. Its human nature.
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I is bad, but it's not at all uncommon
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No one will truly figure out their place in life TBH, you'll always find new questions about life when answers are given
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if you are feeling unfulfilled, first ask yourself if it is due to:

external circumstances (societal expectations, friend's situations etc.)
or
if it is internal (something you've always wanted to do but have been putting off or just haven't had "time").

I personally don't disregard external pressures completely because I, myself, am quite oblivious but each have priority at different times.

Generally, people feel unfulfilled due to things they can change themselves but for various reason don't.

Many people people say "people, don't change" but I people are very capable of change it's just easier not to and remain on autopilot. I was on autopilot for awhile like you, but for me I wanted something different. So one of the steps I've taken (obviously it'll depend on what you want) is going back to school.

So first self reflect and analyze by using your overthinking to your advantage. Even make a spreadsheet if you want.

hopefully it'll lead you to a direction you want to go
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