Current Events > "I'm engaged to a raging racist, but otherwise he's great"

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Antifar
12/04/17 10:57:49 AM
#1:


http://www.mercurynews.com/2017/12/03/engaged-to-a-racist/

DEAR CAROLYN: I am engaged to a great guy with many wonderful qualities and I am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him.

But he is prejudiced against one specific race, which also happens to be the race of several of my ex-boyfriends. He works in law enforcement, so part of me wants to attribute the racism to the fact that he has seen this particular race do many horrible things that I havent. This seems like a pretty trivial thing we all have some sort of bias or prejudice but its getting to the point where I cant even talk to a member of this race in a work meeting about a work-related project without my fiance turning it into a huge fight and accusing me of trying to be a liaison for all [race] people.

He doesnt think hes doing anything wrong, and I end up being the one to apologize and try to fix things even though I dont think Im doing anything wrong either. The amount of time and energy we have spent arguing about this race is downright embarrassing.

I know you cant change anyone, you can only change yourself, but short of moving to a commune in Massachusetts, Im not sure what I can do. This seems like such a small thing to break up over, but it also seems like something I cant argue about for the rest of my life.


How would you respond to this letter, would-be advice columnists of CE?
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averagejoel
12/04/17 11:00:25 AM
#2:


that's hardly a "small thing"

he's a bootlicker and he's openly racist. DUMP HIM
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That_Happened
12/04/17 11:02:06 AM
#3:


Antifar posted...
But he is prejudiced against one specific race, which also happens to be the race of several of my ex-boyfriends. He works in law enforcement, so part of me wants to attribute the racism to the fact that he has seen this particular race do many horrible things that I havent. This seems like a pretty trivial thing

:eye roll:

Antifar posted...
but its getting to the point where I cant even talk to a member of this race in a work meeting about a work-related project without my fiance turning it into a huge fight and accusing me of trying to be a liaison for all [race] people.

He doesnt think hes doing anything wrong,
and I end up being the one to apologize and try to fix things

This is a fake letter, right?
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Irony
12/04/17 11:02:06 AM
#4:


Women are required to nuture and support their husband. The correct answer would be to tell her to also become racist.
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Zodd3224
12/04/17 11:03:36 AM
#5:


Nice to hear that he's a cop
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Intro2Logic
12/04/17 11:04:01 AM
#6:


Antifar posted...
He works in law enforcement,


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tremain07
12/04/17 11:04:32 AM
#7:


nb4crimecharts
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BLAKUboy
12/04/17 11:07:14 AM
#8:


If they actually believe this is a "small thing" then they're probably a little racist themselves. Fuck 'em.
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Oshawottownage
12/04/17 11:07:33 AM
#9:


Sounds fake as hell lol.
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Kaname_Madoka
12/04/17 11:10:54 AM
#10:


Oshawottownage posted...
Sounds fake as hell lol.

This
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AmericaTheBrave
12/04/17 11:12:38 AM
#11:


I didn't know The Admiral was engaged.
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pinky0926
12/04/17 11:13:25 AM
#12:


but its getting to the point where I cant even talk to a member of this race in a work meeting about a work-related project without my fiance turning it into a huge fight and accusing me of trying to be a liaison for all [race] people.

Jesus Christ, I mean I could see someone being unsure of how to deal with someone with a few prejudices but this sentence stepped things up 14 notches. Kick his ass to the curb.
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Kitt
12/04/17 11:15:43 AM
#13:


Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.
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#14
Post #14 was unavailable or deleted.
josifrees
12/04/17 11:16:45 AM
#15:


Run as far away as possible.
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masticatingman
12/04/17 11:17:56 AM
#16:


but its getting to the point where I cant even talk to a member of this race in a work meeting about a work-related project without my fiance turning it into a huge fight and accusing me of trying to be a liaison for all [race] people.

And how does he know about who she talks to in these work meetings exactly?
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Infinite 2003
12/04/17 11:19:29 AM
#17:


Does CE think racial issues should be the most important thing to everybody? Some people just don't really care about rascism. If he's good for her in every other way it's not all that crazy she's willing to look past something she considers minor.
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ChainedRedone
12/04/17 11:22:27 AM
#18:


Infinite 2003 posted...
Does CE think racial issues should be the most important thing to everybody? Some people just don't really care about rascism. If he's good for her in every other way it's not all that crazy she's willing to look past something she considers minor.


4/10

Nobody respond
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Squidkids
12/04/17 11:23:13 AM
#19:


Antifar posted...
but its getting to the point where I cant even talk to a member of this race in a work meeting about a work-related project without my fiance turning it into a huge fight and accusing me of trying to be a liaison for all [race] people.

break up with him because it is interfering with your life too much, infatuation is a thing, you need to move past it.

This is why a lot of woman enter in abusive relationships and do not leave, lets prevent that before it starts plz.

ChainedRedone posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
Does CE think racial issues should be the most important thing to everybody? Some people just don't really care about rascism. If he's good for her in every other way it's not all that crazy she's willing to look past something she considers minor.


4/10

Nobody respond

k
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SmidgeIsntBack
12/04/17 11:25:40 AM
#20:


I like how this is just the average r/relationships post
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MysticMismagius
12/04/17 11:27:01 AM
#21:


SmidgeIsntBack posted...
I like how this is just the average r/relationships post
It looks more like something on r/StormfrontorSJW to me, especially since the race is blanked out.
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pinky0926
12/04/17 11:28:07 AM
#22:


SmidgeIsntBack posted...
I like how this is just the average r/relationships post


Nah the average /r/relationships post is something minor like

"So my hubby sometimes leaves the toilet seat up, I've tried talking to him about it but he keeps doing it. What should I do?"

With the top voted comments always being along the lines of "he's not respecting or communicating with you, time to dump the guy and move on".
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SmidgeIsntBack
12/04/17 11:29:38 AM
#23:


It just has the typical template of "my SO is perfect in every way except this tiny thing, how can I look past it for the sake of our relationship?"
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Infinite 2003
12/04/17 11:29:57 AM
#24:


I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.
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ChainedRedone
12/04/17 11:31:18 AM
#25:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Lol ain't even trying at this point.
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AmericaTheBrave
12/04/17 11:31:45 AM
#26:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


What if this "ethnic group" was white people and she was a hardcore SJW?
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Kitt
12/04/17 11:33:50 AM
#27:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.

We found the person who wrote this.
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That_Happened
12/04/17 11:34:12 AM
#28:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group.

For a physical relationship I'd be fine with it. But getting married to someone like that? No way.
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lilORANG
12/04/17 11:34:34 AM
#29:


why are y'all so antagonistic towards everyone?
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butthole666
12/04/17 11:35:02 AM
#30:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.

I literally stopped talking to a girl because she was racist as fuck yes
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Awesome
12/04/17 11:36:35 AM
#31:


sounds like she cant resist the bad boy, but her logic part of her brain is trying to combat the reptilian part aka her feelings of arousal override her thinking process.
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Infinite 2003
12/04/17 11:36:42 AM
#32:


ChainedRedone posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Lol ain't even trying at this point.


You try to dismiss me as a troll but you know that I'm right. Y'all are phoney as hell with this "I'd never be like her!" I'm such a good person!" bullshit. Fuck outta here
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#33
Post #33 was unavailable or deleted.
Zodd3224
12/04/17 11:37:33 AM
#34:


Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Im sure he'd instill some good morals in their children as well.
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Solar_Crimson
12/04/17 11:38:11 AM
#35:


CrimsonRage posted...
There's a difference between tolerating someone with a prejudice and being around a full blown racist. If this woman literally cannot talk to people of this race without her fiance exploding in a rage, that is not someone healthy to be around and she should dump him.

Assuming this isn't fake.

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#36
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Paper_Okami
12/04/17 11:42:31 AM
#37:


Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based
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Zodd3224
12/04/17 11:44:05 AM
#38:


Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based


I dont get it. What race would they be referring to in Mass?
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AmericaTheBrave
12/04/17 11:44:49 AM
#39:


AmericaTheBrave posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


What if this "ethnic group" was white people and she was a hardcore SJW?


No response @Infinite_2003?
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Infinite 2003
12/04/17 11:45:52 AM
#40:


AmericaTheBrave posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


What if this "ethnic group" was white people and she was a hardcore SJW?


If you're white and she was like that she might not like you anyway in the first place. Sobutthole666 posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.

I literally stopped talking to a girl because she was racist as fuck yes


And was she a 919 who was perfect for you in every other way. In your case, in highly doubt that.Zodd3224 posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Im sure he'd instill some good morals in their children as well.


Never said that he would. Just saying it may not be as important to her as you all like to pretend it is for you. Some of us are realists. Not self righteous virtue signallers
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Paper_Okami
12/04/17 11:46:34 AM
#41:


Zodd3224 posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based


I dont get it. What race would they be referring to in Mass?


He's saying black people despite you know all 50 states having a significant history of racism towards black people, kind of what our country was built on
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thanosibe
12/04/17 11:49:11 AM
#42:


Her life, her business.
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Infinite 2003
12/04/17 11:50:57 AM
#43:


CrimsonRage posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
ChainedRedone posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Lol ain't even trying at this point.


You try to dismiss me as a troll but you know that I'm right. Y'all are phoney as hell with this "I'd never be like her!" I'm such a good person!" bullshit. Fuck outta here


Oh shut up. If you bothered to read the entire letter, you'd know this goes beyond ignorant opinions. She literally can't interact with people of this ethnic group without him flying off the handle. That is not going to lead to a healthy relationship down the road.

And don't act like you wouldn't turn down "the perfect woman" if she held views you hated. It just so happens you don't consider racism bad (shock) but I bet you wouldn't be with a woman who was a hardcore feminist/misandrist/SJW whatever ideology you hate.


I didn't say I don't consider rascism bad, or even that I would stay in the situation she's in. I said it's not the most important thing in the world to everybody and lots of people would probably be willing to look past it because it's true. Learn how to read buddy.
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ChainedRedone
12/04/17 11:51:05 AM
#44:


thanosibe posted...
Her life, her business.


What a stupid fucking post.
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Kitt
12/04/17 11:51:48 AM
#45:


Paper_Okami posted...
Zodd3224 posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based


I dont get it. What race would they be referring to in Mass?


He's saying black people despite you know all 50 states having a significant history of racism towards black people, kind of what our country was built on

I didn't say shit. Good job jumping to that conclusion yourself though.
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ChainedRedone
12/04/17 11:52:28 AM
#46:


Infinite 2003 posted...
CrimsonRage posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
ChainedRedone posted...
Infinite 2003 posted...
I'm sure you'd all turn down a 919 who was perfect for you in everyway just because she had some weird/ignorant opinions about a random ethnic group. Lol. Bunch of fake ass virtue signallers.


Lol ain't even trying at this point.


You try to dismiss me as a troll but you know that I'm right. Y'all are phoney as hell with this "I'd never be like her!" I'm such a good person!" bullshit. Fuck outta here


Oh shut up. If you bothered to read the entire letter, you'd know this goes beyond ignorant opinions. She literally can't interact with people of this ethnic group without him flying off the handle. That is not going to lead to a healthy relationship down the road.

And don't act like you wouldn't turn down "the perfect woman" if she held views you hated. It just so happens you don't consider racism bad (shock) but I bet you wouldn't be with a woman who was a hardcore feminist/misandrist/SJW whatever ideology you hate.


I didn't say I don't consider rascism bad, or even that I would stay in the situation she's in. I said it's not the most important thing in the world to everybody and lots of people would probably be willing to look past it because it's true. Learn how to read buddy.


She said it has a very negative impact on her life. And you tell others to learn to read. You see why I told you guys not to respond to the troll? Good job feeding him.
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Paper_Okami
12/04/17 11:55:06 AM
#47:


Kitt posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Zodd3224 posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based


I dont get it. What race would they be referring to in Mass?


He's saying black people despite you know all 50 states having a significant history of racism towards black people, kind of what our country was built on

I didn't say shit. Good job jumping to that conclusion yourself though.


Implication was obvious
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#48
Post #48 was unavailable or deleted.
Kitt
12/04/17 11:56:59 AM
#49:


Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Zodd3224 posted...
Paper_Okami posted...
Kitt posted...
Massachusetts

Gee, I wonder which race they're refering to.


Dumb post mercury news is bay area cali based


I dont get it. What race would they be referring to in Mass?


He's saying black people despite you know all 50 states having a significant history of racism towards black people, kind of what our country was built on

I didn't say shit. Good job jumping to that conclusion yourself though.


Implication was obvious

Lmfao. You should use that in court one day.
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Zodd3224
12/04/17 12:00:18 PM
#50:


So what were you implying then Kitt? I live in Mass, I'm perplexed by this.
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