Current Events > I 'ghosted' this chick -- am I going to hell?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I feel bad, but I also got a little bit fooled -- her tinder profile didn't have any shots of her teeth (except from way far away where I couldn't tell) but she was cute enough that I didn't really care.

But we get to the brewery and her teeth are just horrific. Fairly yellow and just all over the place.

I feel justified because her teeth were obviously intentionally hidden in her profile, but at the same time, I still feel a little guilty (especially since I just went on a second date with a different woman last night)
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That's not the reason you ghosted her though. You don't want to date her because you find her unattractive, but you ghosted her because turning her down is awkward and difficult.

I guess it just depends if you honestly feel she's expecting a call back. Did you guys do anything, or was it pretty clear that there was nothing there?
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Wait hold up. Do you mean you're not returning her calls or did you literally just run away halfway through the date?
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Just tell her youre not interested.
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Read topic title and thought "damn, this dude killed a chick and he's worried about going to hell more than jail?"

It all makes sense now.
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Yea, you have to say you aren't interested, you'll probably make her feel bad by giving her that finality, but ghosting her is going to hurt her just as bad if not more and you come off as a terrible person.
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pinky0926 posted...

That's not the reason you ghosted her though. You don't want to date her because you find her unattractive, but you ghosted her because turning her down is awkward and difficult.

I guess it just depends if you honestly feel she's expecting a call back. Did you guys do anything, or was it pretty clear that there was nothing there?

We went to a brewery. I got a beer, later found out that she doesn't like beer at all (so I felt bad the whole time for sitting there because she didn't tell me that she doesn't like beer) but she at least got a snack there.

The conversation was okay as far as tinder first dates go, but I really wasn't attracted to her once she, uh, smiled.

pinky0926 posted...

Wait hold up. Do you mean you're not returning her calls or did you literally just run away halfway through the date?

The former, though she hasn't texted in a while. But I was the one being pseudo-difficult to talk to because I just am not attracted to her. So she's not presently waiting on a response from me or anything, but I won't be initiating any conversation.

If she reaches out again then I'll probably just say hey sorry I'm really clicking with this other chick I met on fetlife.

VipaGTS posted...

Just tell her youre not interested.

Yeah I will if she reaches out.

Megaman50100 posted...

Yea, you have to say you aren't interested, you'll probably make her feel bad by giving her that finality, but ghosting her is going to hurt her just as bad if not more and you come off as a terrible person.

Yeah maybe ghosted was the wrong word -- I'm not actively ignoring her or anything, but I'm not making any effort to reach out or talk or hang out.
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I don't know if you owe her a reply in this context, then. Sounds like she read between the lines. If she messages you again though you should give her a polite rejection.
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pinky0926 posted...

I don't know if you owe her a reply in this context, then. Sounds like she read between the lines. If she messages you again though you should give her a polite rejection.

Yeah that seems to be the plan

leverageblargh posted...

Were you scared to tell her that you didn't want to see her anymore because of her poor dental hygiene?

I mean yeah lol
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Bitches ghost dudes all the time for far less reason, I wouldn't feel an iota of bad.
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when you see a girl only smiling with mouth closed in more or less all her pics, her teeth are fucked up.
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no premarital sex =/= no hell

i think ur safe homie

if ghosting sends you to hell you'll have plenty of female company with ya OP.
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AsucaHayashi posted...

when you see a girl only smiling with mouth closed in more or less all her pics, her teeth are fucked up.

Yeah I know, but there was a smiling teeth photo from a little far away so it didn't really trigger that flag in my head
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If you havent slept with a girl yet, you can ghost her without any feelings of guilt.

Same standard applies to women ghosting guys.
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She's a grown ass woman. If she can't tell that youre not interested when you make zero effort to pursue a relationship then there's something wrong with her. That's how dating works. There's no need to sit her down and have a real conversation about this shit.
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