Current Events > My girlfriend is trying to influence my car buying decision

(+) Yeah! (+)

Context: We've been dating for two years, she bought an SUV right bedore we met, I've been driving the same econobox for 10 years and I'm about ready to buy a new car. I'm thinking something like a WRX or Miata as a fun daily.

Yesterday she said she wanted me to buy something practical because if I get a two seater she's forced to drive her car if we're with people, I told her it's my money and I can buy whatever I want. She said she felt like she should have a say in big money decisions, I replied that I'd take her advice into consideration but she has no say on what I decide to buy. It's not a house that we're both buying together, it'd be my fucking car. I wouldn't try to influence what car she decided to buy.

I don't know CE I'm disappointed she even tried to dictate my decision. If I wanted to buy a dildo on wheels I would, it's my fucking money. Am I in the wrong? Are most boyfriends whipped soy boys that buy minivans?

clearaflagrantj posted...

If I wanted to buy a dildo on wheels I would, it's my fucking money.

are you going to?

I think you should

I know I would
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she raises a fair point about having to drive if there's more than just you two, but it is ultimately your decision
most girls I've dated preferred me driving, even their own cars though
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Yeah she should have her say but understand it is your decision alone.
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arent wrxs 4 doors anyway? whats the problem?
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chill02 posted...

clearaflagrantj posted...

If I wanted to buy a dildo on wheels I would, it's my fucking money.

are you going to?

I think you should

I know I would

What's the point of having a girlfriend then?

So she's saying she wants you to drive everyone in your car instead of hers. Fuck that, dude. Get the Subee
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Weezy_Tha_Don posted...

arent wrxs 4 doors anyway? whats the problem?

Yup. She said she wouldn't mind if I got a WRX but she would hate an STI if I got one (she thinks the wing looks dumb, it's also a much stiffer/rougher ride). She'd also hate if I got a Honda CTR even though that's a five seater as well.

She wants me to get a bone stock civic basically.

When the two of you go somewhere do you insist on driving?
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prince_leo posted...

she raises a fair point about having to drive if there's more than just you two, but it is ultimately your decision
most girls I've dated preferred me driving, even their own cars though

That is not a fucking fair point whatsoever. If she's that concerned about mileage or gas then he can put up for an uber to save a fight.
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Anteaterking posted...

When the two of you go somewhere do you insist on driving?

Nope, we drive 50/50 for the most part. If I got a car I actually liked I'd probably drive more often though

Lol sounds like shes thinking about marriage or having kids. My wife says the same thing, says I cant get a 2 door car because its not good for filling with car seats and babies. God help me
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Was this just something she mentioned once in passing, or did it become a heated discussion?
I don't see anything wrong with her inputting an opinion, but ya, ultimately it is your choice
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She's just letting you know two seaters are stupid. It's a fact.
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Nikra posted...

chill02 posted...

clearaflagrantj posted...

If I wanted to buy a dildo on wheels I would, it's my fucking money.

are you going to?

I think you should

I know I would

What's the point of having a girlfriend then?

to have her push the dildo around while you're riding on top of it
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Wtf
No. Tell her to fuck off. It's your money and your car. Also are you guys carting other people around regularly that this is even an issue?
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Get what you want bruh
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To hell what she says. Just get a minivan since youre so scared of your gf.
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Jiek_Fafn posted...

Wtf
No. Tell her to fuck off. It's your money and your car. Also are you guys carting other people around regularly that this is even an issue?

Nope barely ever

emblem boy posted...

Was this just something she mentioned once in passing, or did it become a heated discussion?
I don't see anything wrong with her inputting an opinion, but ya, ultimately it is your choice

She brings it up every time I talk about how I like the sportier cars like Miatas and BRZs, she's a very level and reasonable person, she's just being very open with her opinions. She knows IDGAF though and will buy whatever I want. Yesterday was weird because she openly said she felt like she should have some say, I think she has no say.

Romulox28 posted...

Lol sounds like shes thinking about marriage or having kids. My wife says the same thing, says I cant get a 2 door car because its not good for filling with car seats and babies. God help me

Don't worry when you're 50 you'll get a nice mid life crisis dad mobile

honestly, i think she's right

if you drive 50/50 when youre with other people and get a two seater, you cant do that anymore and it is unfair to her

gotta make compromises

She's either thinking about marriage/kids or she's trying to run you. Either way it's your money. Buy what you want fam
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1. Is her name going to be on the title at all?

2. Are your incomes currently pooled together or is she going to help with the payments in any way?

3. Do you regularly have to travel with multiple people?

if the answer to those is no, then fuck that and buy what you want.

clearaflagrantj posted...

Anteaterking posted...

When the two of you go somewhere do you insist on driving?

Nope, we drive 50/50 for the most part. If I got a car I actually liked I'd probably drive more often though

Then I don't really think she should care. Between the two of you you'll have cars for both purposes and unless you're constantly needing her car, it shouldn't matter.
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seriously, though, get the WRX
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You should get the 4 door WRX with the wing and tell her this is my car not yours, if you dont like it go pound sand.

If she is being a bitch about YOUR car then you should either correct her about what is acceptable in the relationship or dump her ass and buy anything you want.

I personally dont care for 2 door cars but I do love a good sports car or exotic.
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Weezy_Tha_Don posted...

arent wrxs 4 doors anyway? whats the problem?

Also this, WTF? Do they even make a 2 door WRX?

Youngster_Joey_ posted...

Weezy_Tha_Don posted...

arent wrxs 4 doors anyway? whats the problem?

Also this, WTF? Do they even make a 2 door WRX?

not anymore, but they used to
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clearaflagrantj posted...

Miata

clearaflagrantj posted...

If I wanted to buy a dildo on wheels I would

Sounds like you might tbh
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Not surprised CE is full of people who want you to tell her to fuck off.
Relationships are not you vs her. Talk to her about how often you drive with other people and how much enjoyment the car will bring you. You should be able to come to an agreement.
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@Hinakuluiau

When she is trying to tell him what to buy more then a suggestion its her attempt to run his life and thats not acceptable.

She just bought a car recently from what he posted and I highly doubt she even asked for his opinion before buying her vehicle.
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Hinakuluiau posted...

Not surprised CE is full of people who want you to tell her to fuck off.
Relationships are not you vs her. Talk to her about how often you drive with other people and how much enjoyment the car will bring you. You should be able to come to an agreement.

Yeah, this. You'd think she's 'forcing' you to buy a car she thinks is practical, but at the same time if you buy a 2-door you'd be forcing her to drive when company's over. Which isn't fair tbh
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Offworlder1 posted...

She just bought a car recently from what he posted and I highly doubt she even asked for his opinion before buying her vehicle.

Not surprising considering she bought it before they met.

Offworlder1 posted...

When she is trying to tell him what to buy more then a suggestion its her attempt to run his life and thats not acceptable.

That's not true. You're getting half the story from him and we don't know their history, the way she's phrasing certain words, etc.
Again, you shouldn't be treating a relationship like 'my wants vs her wants' when you could address situations like adults.
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Where will your baby fit
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The things most people deal with
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ShutTheF---_Up posted...

if you buy a 2-door you'd be forcing her to drive when company's over.

How often do they have company over where they have to drive their company somewhere?

What if clear is the one driving more often when the two of them are alone?

No one says any of this has to be unbalanced, even if in individual scenarios it is.
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I mean,,,,, you guys have been together two years, so I'm assuming it's a pretty serious relationship. You should at least take her advice into consideration, just make it clear you have the final say.

Two-seaters are dumb cars anyway. They're only for two types of people: celebrities and dads going through a midlife crisis.

That said a WRX is not a two-seater, so if you're leaning that way I'd go with that.
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Anteaterking posted...

ShutTheF---_Up posted...

if you buy a 2-door you'd be forcing her to drive when company's over.

How often do they have company over where they have to drive their company somewhere?

What if clear is the one driving more often when the two of them are alone?

No one says any of this has to be unbalanced, even if in individual scenarios it is.

These are good points that TC should bring up with his gf
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Been trying to convince my wife to let me get a WRX. But she wants bigger. More kids, more room, more practical, etc etc bull shit
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Shes his gf, not his wife.
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@Waddlez

Sounds like misery tbh, and her wanting more kids: is she working or just you, do you have to work longer hrs or both of you ?

Honestly your situation is why a lot of dudes are very picky with who they get together with.
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Waddlez posted...

Been trying to convince my wife to let me get a WRX. But she wants bigger. More kids, more room, more practical, etc etc bull shit

AWD = Tears up the snow

TheBiggerWiggle posted...

Two-seaters are dumb cars anyway. They're only for two types of people: celebrities and dads going through a midlife crisis.

The Civic Si Coupe looks WAY better than the sedan though, it's also faster because it's lighter IIRC.

Anteaterking posted...

How often do they have company over where they have to drive their company somewhere?

Barely ever

Anteaterking posted...

What if clear is the one driving more often when the two of them are alone?

We split it for the most part, but Id just drive us two all the time and let her drive when we have people over

Youngster_Joey_ posted...

1. Is her name going to be on the title at all?

2. Are your incomes currently pooled together or is she going to help with the payments in any way?

3. Do you regularly have to travel with multiple people?

if the answer to those is no, then fuck that and buy what you want.

1. Nope

2. Nope, I keep our finances completely separate

3. Nope

We both make comparable salaries, we split all expenses like rent and groceries down the middle, we do not share money, we have yet to experience a scenario where we need to pool money together (like buying a house).

Why do you treat your relationship like an antagonistic part of your life? Shes treating you like a committed partner and wants your life decisions to reflect that.

You ask how does she feel like she can control how I spend my money?

The answer is because she loves you and sees herself spending the long foreseeable future in a committed relationship with you. Your assets become shared assets in that context. If thats not how you feel, then thats the conversation you should be having. If youre going to hold this woman on the fence, shes going to wind up leaving you for someone who can give her the same.
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J E S U S posted...

Shes his gf, not his wife.

I get that. But my guess is that she's thinking long term.

Offworlder1 posted...

@Waddlez

Sounds like misery tbh, and her wanting more kids: is she working or just you, do you have to work longer hrs or both of you ?

Honestly your situation is why a lot of dudes are very picky with who they get together with.

We're both working and the WRX is within budget now. I figured getting a performance car wasn't really gonna be in my plans as soon as I hoped once we got married (financially). Then having a kid really killed those plans (practicality in her opinion). I have a tC so I was like see, WRX has 4 doors it's bigger it's roomy. No problem. But she thinks about more space, another kid, the baby's friends when they get older, traveling with pets.

I'm not miserable and I don't regret anything but I'm sad I don't get to drive anything fun for now. Actually a few weekends ago I test drove a WRX and the guy told me to turn on a particular street. We had been talking about how I was trying to get my wife on board. So I was like hey actually I live down this way let's stop by and show the wife. She was outside in the driveway with our daughter when I rolled up. She was not thrilled lol. At least I stuck to my word, I didn't tell her where I was going but I did say I'd be back in an hour.
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Hinakuluiau posted...

we don't know their history,

We actually do. He doesn't see a real future with her but she does.
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clearaflagrantj posted...

Waddlez posted...

Been trying to convince my wife to let me get a WRX. But she wants bigger. More kids, more room, more practical, etc etc bull shit

AWD = Tears up the snow

Actually I think I could hype up the all wheel drive more than I have so far :D
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Shes got a good point. Also, you have to give her credit for being vocal. Thats way better than if she didnt say anything, but started complaining after the fact.

The thing is, though, it seems like most WRXs I see have four doors. They make an Impreza hatchback that looks like a 2/3 size model of my Outback.

https://www.autotrader.com/research/car-models/2018-Subaru-Impreza/30812-395723-Hatchback/2.0i-5-door-Manual~model.jsp
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I'd pick the WRX over the Miata. I'd personally shell out for the STi but do agree the wing is ridiculous although since it's from the factory, it's not that big of a deal.
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new miatas are beautiful
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