Current Events > it's literally pride month and there's no LGBT social

(+) Yeah! (+)

TeaMilk posted...

BloodyNate posted...

TeaMilk posted...

I kinda want to go to pride this year (never been before) but I don't really have anyone to go with. Would it be weird to go alone? I think it's a pretty big event in my city

what city?

Portland, OR. iirc you live there too, right?

ooooh! maybe we could meet up at some point, if only briefly? itd be cool to meet another CEman
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BloodyNate posted...

ooooh! maybe we could meet up at some point, if only briefly? itd be cool to meet another CEman

i'm kinda nervous about meeting people, but i'd consider it! :D also just so there's no surprises i'm not a guy lol

have you gone to portland pride in the past? how was it?
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TeaMilk posted...

i'm kinda nervous about meeting people, but i'd consider it! :D also just so there's no surprises i'm not a guy lol

have you gone to portland pride in the past? how was it?

thatd be super cool! yeah whatever youre comfortable with, no worries :) i cant believe i just said CEman in 2018 lol.

ive never been to any pride! but i like the idea of it and it would give me an excuse to get out of the house and meet people and ive been struggling with that a bit
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TeaMilk posted...

I kinda want to go to pride this year (never been before) but I don't really have anyone to go with. Would it be weird to go alone? I think it's a pretty big event in my city

Wouldn't be that weird, but personally speaking I wouldn't stick around too much. Probably just people watch at the parade and not hang around at the festivities.

It's quite possible to latch onto a group; there will be a lot of LGBT social/volunteer groups with banners and tents and stuff that are actively looking for new members and will be more than willing to exchange pleasantries/contact info with you. It's a great opportunity to meet people.

(Or, you know, a CE-meet)
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What's Portland Pride like?
The closest I've gotten was doing stuff downtown while it was going on, but I kinda just ignored it >->

(That was also back when I had no interest whatsoever in it, and I had stuff to do before heading back to Tigard. So it wasn't going to work out regardless.)
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LinksLiege posted...

What's Portland Pride like?
The closest I've gotten was doing stuff downtown while it was going on, but I kinda just ignored it >->

(That was also back when I had no interest whatsoever in it, and I had stuff to do before heading back to Tigard. So it wasn't going to work out regardless.)

im honestly not sure. i can promise you two things: its gay af and there will be people smoking weed. but if you go we should say hey!
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boy nothing feels better than being called the f word am I right my good pals
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CookieMarvin posted...

boy nothing feels better than being called the f word am I right my good pals

wait in the affectionate way or in he asshole way?
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there is no affectionate way imo.
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CookieMarvin posted...

there is no affectionate way imo.

thats kinda how i feel about it, but some feel differently and i didnt wanna jump to conclusions. fuck im sorry someone did that to you. wanna talk about it?
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theres not a whole lot to talk about. some pathetic child came into our discord and followed up one of my posts w the f word. then he got mad at me for not sitting there and taking it. its a tale as old as time: little punk gets called out for being a bigot, then gets counter mad at the people who said something.

he stormed off in a huff because thats easier than doing any self-reflection. he better not come back any time soon, thats all Im saying.
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grosssssssssssssssssssss asshole. did he get b7, or at least suspended?
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I dont think so.

our mod and admin are good people, but theyve been pretty inept at handling this stuff in the time Ive known them. And like, that really hurts to say out loud, because I genuinely love them both, but you know what else hurts? getting called the f word.
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ok maybe thats unfair of me. I didnt actually stick around to see if he got kicked something. I was pretty mad so I went to go play basketball
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If youre going to embellish the truth splat, at least not blatantly lie about it
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Haha, nice!
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Im not doing this with you. what he did was unacceptable and its geneuinely unfuckingbelievable that youre coming in here to defend it just because theyre mad Im not thrilled with how they handle this shit.
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oh hey, there he is. the homophobe himself. make yourself at home. put your feet up.
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Thats fine,

But again
PlsGodDontBanMe posted...

If youre going to embellish the truth splat, at least not blatantly lie about it

Or you could talk to people on the discord about it instead of just lying and throwing insults right back
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Aight, hold up.

So, uhh

What I said wasn't directed at you whatsoever. I understand that it offended you, and I'm genuinely sorry to you and everyone else it upset. There is no excuse.

However, coming in here and spewing pure and utter bullshit, twisting the story completely? Yeah, that's fucked. Try again.
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it was resolved; please lets go back to being gay itt. I cant let that ruin this topic
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BloodyNate posted...

im honestly not sure. i can promise you two things: its gay af and there will be people smoking weed. but if you go we should say hey!

Eh, still on the fence.

This is the first time I've ever even considered going, more out of curiosity than anything. >->
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what are you curious about? just wanna know what its like or sumn?
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Iunno, really. Never been to one, never thought about going to one, etc.

It's only just recently that I've told anyone I know IRL that I'm bi, so maybe that has something to do with it.
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LinksLiege posted...

Iunno, really. Never been to one, never thought about going to one, etc.

It's only just recently that I've told anyone I know IRL that I'm bi, so maybe that has something to do with it.

that makes sense! my school had its pride event in April and I didnt go bc no one here knows Im bi. I mean, with my constant thirsting over dudes, Im sure my roommates know, but Im not officially out to anyone in this town
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CookieMarvin posted...

it was resolved; please lets go back to being gay itt. I cant let that ruin this topic

HEAR HEAR

also, if one were to say a homophobic slur, then that does indeed make one a piece of shit, just so everyone knows

LinksLiege posted...

Eh, still on the fence.

This is the first time I've ever even considered going, more out of curiosity than anything. >->

thats fair. if you make up your mind, hit me up
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CookieMarvin posted...

that makes sense! my school had its pride event in April and I didnt go bc no one here knows Im bi. I mean, with my constant thirsting over dudes, Im sure my roommates know, but Im not officially out to anyone in this town

Do you live somewhere where it wouldn't be the best idea to come out?
I don't have that excuse - I live in Oregon, right outside the liberal Mecca that is downtown Portland. >_>; I'd like to say I never tried to keep quiet about it, but that isn't true; there definitely were some times where I chose to avoid outing myself, for a bunch of reasons.

BloodyNate posted...

thats fair. if you make up your mind, hit me up

Is there any particular day you'd be going? Just in case I go.
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LinksLiege posted...

Is there any particular day you'd be going? Just in case I go.

i mean i think the parade and such are on saturday, right? idk much about pride
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I wouldn't have any idea.

I don't know what happens at pride events beyond...people being gay around each other.
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LinksLiege posted...

I wouldn't have any idea.

I don't know what happens at pride events beyond...people being gay around each other.

that should be our national pastime tbh. sorry baseball

LinksLiege posted...

Do you live somewhere where it wouldn't be the best idea to come out?
I don't have that excuse - I live in Oregon, right outside the liberal Mecca that is downtown Portland. >_>; I'd like to say I never tried to keep quiet about it, but that isn't true; there definitely were some times where I chose to avoid outing myself, for a bunch of reasons.

I go to school in Appalachia, so im surrounded by about 90% white cishet people, so Im never really sure how itll go. On the north side of town, where the walking district and university are, I think it would be fine most of the time, but like, as I get farther away from campus, it becomes increasingly likely that I might run into some problems.

I came really close to coming out last semester though bc my editor at the school paper was gay and trans and theyre the sweetest and most supportive person Ive ever met, but they graduated in May and idk if Im ever gonna see them again tbh
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Is the community so close-knit that the campus knowing would mean people out on the fringe would definitely find out?
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probably not, the town hates us lmao. cant really blame em too much, though. the poverty level here is like, 60% and were a bunch of shitty kids in a nice school with a population thats bigger than the town itself. Id probably resent us too
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And they haven't figured out that driving away the successful people with their vitriol might not be the way to make things improve?

I'd probably feel compelled to come out just to spite them, but I'm not the best example to follow with that. Kinda odd - I'd gay it up just to spite people, but not when everyone around me is perfectly accepting of that sort of thing. >_>;
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I mean, theyre not necessarily driving people away. its pretty complicated tbh. the town of boone sits in the middle of the of a valley, so theres really limited real estate. half of the land is super vertical, which is expensive to build on, and then also like, half of the town lies within a flood plain which they cant really build in bc itd be putting people in danger. as such, theres this ongoing struggle over affordable housing, which us students can snatch up bc we have these student loan checks, and it drives the actual residents of town increasingly farther out of the town and into the county. In 2013, 47% of the town had a commute of more than 50 miles one way. Its a really big point of tension right now.

sorry, that explanation was honestly so unnecessary, but Im super passionate about it bc Ive been researching/writing stories about this since November.

but I like that line of thinking. I guess Im still kinda afraid of people looking at me differently bc Im gay, but like, fuck it, right?
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Impressive that you've delved that far into it - can't imagine many college kids would do that.

Maybe I'm reading it wrong but, considering you hesitated to come out even to a gay trans person who doubtlessly would've understood it was being done in confidence...iunno, it sounds like the act of coming out has turned into a monumental event in your mind - not even necessarily in a good or bad way, just that it'll be a big moment. Which I understand, because I kinda have done the same thing. (I just have the judgment of my father and stepmother to deal with, though, not the majority of a small town.) Your school had a pride event and all, so it sounds like you'll be at least somewhat safe. The reaction might not even be big at all - I came out to one of my coworkers (who is bi himself) and his response was just, "I'm not surprised."
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Ive definitely turned it into a super big thing in my mind, but I dont want it to be a thing at all. I just wish people knew.
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I'm still not very much "out" at this point but what I can say is, the second person took a lot less effort than the first, after seeing that the sky hadn't fallen. The third was even easier than that.
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its been the opposite for me. the first time I shared, it was w my close group of friends and it started a chain reaction where like, four of us actually came out. that was really cool and exciting. the second time was my dad, which was alright I guess, and the third was my mom, which left me exhausted and kinda with a weird taste in my mouth. she made a joke about how I was breaking stereotypes because I was gay and had shitty style, which like,,,,, gee mom, thanks for the phat double insult
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I wish I could care about "the cause" to attend parades and rallies and whatnot but I really don't. Maybe I'm just selfish at the end of the day I dunno. Makes me sad sometimes.
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that doesnt make you selfish! pride events are theoretically for everyone, but that doesnt mean theyre for everyone, ya know? not wanting to attend big parades n shit doesnt invalidate you as a gay person whatsoever!
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Anyone who tells you you need to go to parades and rallies to show support is full of shit, and they probably have an agenda of their own.

CookieMarvin posted...

its been the opposite for me. the first time I shared, it was w my close group of friends and it started a chain reaction where like, four of us actually came out. that was really cool and exciting. the second time was my dad, which was alright I guess, and the third was my mom, which left me exhausted and kinda with a weird taste in my mouth. she made a joke about how I was breaking stereotypes because I was gay and had shitty style, which like,,,,, gee mom, thanks for the phat double insult

At least it sounds like she was...alright with it...? Sounds like she was trying to show that she didn't consider it a big deal or something.

As much as I'm not excited for my dad and stepmom to find out, I'm also not keen on my biological mom finding out either. For the opposite reason - she's very, very pro-LGBT, to the point that I'm worried she'll try to use me as an accessory unless I shut that down immediately. The last thing I want is for my identity to be reduced completely to my sexual preferences - I think that's a big factor in why I avoided talking about it for so long, the thought that I absolutely shouldn't bring it up until it becomes necessary.
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she was definitely just trying to crack a lighthearted joke or something, but she did still sort of misfire. probably wouldnt have been as weird if she aint talk shit about my clothes all the damn time <_<

LinksLiege posted...

As much as I'm not excited for my dad and stepmom to find out, I'm also not keen on my biological mom finding out either. For the opposite reason - she's very, very pro-LGBT, to the point that I'm worried she'll try to use me as an accessory unless I shut that down immediately. The last thing I want is for my identity to be reduced completely to my sexual preferences - I think that's a big factor in why I avoided talking about it for so long, the thought that I absolutely shouldn't bring it up until it becomes necessary.

thats a pretty reasonable fear. being boiled down into some sort of token gay hardly sounds like an enjoyable experience.

Im super fortunate in that I havent seen my biological dad and step mom in years, and probably wont see them again any time soon. My father is an tolerant piece of trash, and I cant imagine hed be thrilled with me tryna get some dick. just thinking about that one makes me shudder.
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I know my dad and stepmom have discussed the possibility of me being gay in the past - he's brought up to me that she thinks that might be the case. (Iunno if me being bi would be any better.)

Some of the comments he's made make me wonder if he's trying to come off as tolerant, but it's hard to take them seriously when he had a repulsed outburst at a gay scene in a movie we were watching. (Note: it was Tropic Thunder, and the "gay scene" was the gay rapper sitting next to Lance Bass in the crowd at an award show. That set him off.)
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wow, of all things, tropic thunder. that would kinda have me a lil worried too

also I just saw that I called my biological dad an tolerant piece of trash, but that was supposed to be intolerant. that may be obvious, but I wanted to clear it up anyway
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He also commented on the fact that it was an interracial pairing. Being around him is a conflicting experience.

And yeah, I figured it was meant to be intolerant.
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LinksLiege posted...

He also commented on the fact that it was an interracial pairing. Being around him is a conflicting experience.

And yeah, I figured it was meant to be intolerant.

oh nooooooooooooo thats uncomfortable
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Part of me wants to just disregard his opinion because of how bigoted it is. The other part of me is his son, and I can't just let it go like that.

The things he's said since then seem to suggest he's had direct experience with gay people (via his work) that caused his opinion to change, and for him to let go of those more repulsive views. Iunno if he was just saying that for conversation, or if he was connecting it to those suspicions about me that they already have.
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that seems pretty damn conflicting. perhaps itll turn out ok, though. I feel like a ton of gen xers are homophobic til they realize their kid aint straight.
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He'll probably find out eventually. For right now I feel no rush. >_>
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