Board 8 > I learned the truth behind le "I cannot sanction your buffoonery" yarn

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GranzonEx
07/30/18 5:07:45 PM
#1:


this is it, Mission 46: THE TRUTH

As many of you know, I manage a comic and game shop. From time to time, I get some interesting characters in the shop, whether it be a low-level writer or artist, an MtG card artist, etc. Today, however, a man in his mid-50s wandered into my shop, just sort of looking around. I got to talking to him, and I learned he was one of the stuntmen in Batman Forever. He was specifically a thug under the employ of Two-Face, and he appeared in five different action sequences in the movies (for moments apiece).

He had developed a working relationship with Joel Schumacher as well as Tommy Lee Jones stretching back two years beforehand; he had also appeared in a small role in The Client. Schumacher invited him to work on Batman Forever, and he was chatting to me about his work in the movie since I pressed him on it, being the comic and movie nerd that I am. He was on set for about five weeks for Batman Forever, and he was telling me about the individual actors and his few encounters with them (aside from Tommy Lee Jones, where he actually knew him and chatted him up frequently).

All of this is preface to say this: at one point I said, "You know, there's a really famous story that Jones didn't get along with Carrey." This guy laughed and said, "Yeah, Tommy was not a happy camper when it came to Carrey." I didn't press him about the line, but here's roughly what he told me:

"When Carrey came in, everyone was told not to talk to him, not to look at him. Just keep our distance. We were all being told that Carrey was becoming the biggest star in Hollywood thanks to this, that he was the first star to get paid $20 million for a single movie. Tommy didn't say anything in particular to me, but he grunted at the mention of Carrey being paid such a big amount. Carrey came in and it was actually the opposite of what the producers told us. Carrey was very genial-like, he talked to everyone, he was always trying to make you laugh off-screen. I had a great conversation with him because I was from Memphis and I got this job because Schumacher had seen me do my Elvis act, so Carrey said, 'I heard you're the Memphis guy!' We had a great conversation. He loved Elvis.

But Tommy thought Jim was unprofessional, that he slowed down filming, that he distracted everybody. And I remember once on The Client, I tried to say good morning to Tommy right before he was gonna film one of his big scenes. He was pacing up and down, reciting his lines out loud. When I stepped into his view and spoke, he held up a finger and he just shot me a glance, it was deadly. 'Don't even think it.' So I knew Tommy took things very seriously on set. I know that I was in commissary, and I got called out for a wardrobe change. Everyone else had these sleeveless leather jackets, but I was being 'upgraded' to a sleeved jacket because my arms were skinnier than everyone else's. On my way there, I saw Tommy and we chatted while I waited for my fitting. And I'll never forget it, I mentioned that I had finally run into Jim, and he actually stopped me and said, "I hate that man." He actually said that to me.

But actually, the biggest diva on the set was Val Kilmer."

Anyways, I thought I would share with you my brush with buffoonery today!

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GranzonEx
07/30/18 5:08:23 PM
#2:


I want to hear the Val Kilmer story now too!

I'll try to transcribe it as best as I can:

One of the first action scenes we filmed was the gang versus Batman, and we prepped it for five days. The stunt coordinator said, "Val will be here, Val is coming." And for five days we worked with his stand-in. But Val was supposed to be in the scene. I don't know if he was working on it somewhere else, but we were in the actual scene, and he never showed up. Until the day of filming.

Now there's this moment in the scene, you can watch, where he delivers this big booted kick to a thug's chest. And the thug goes off-screen and that's their entire spot in the fight. That was me; when Val came in to work, we weren't going to have many opportunities to shoot and reshoot for this scene. Val, to his credit, he goes for the kick just like the rest of us and practiced, but he takes those huge boots and he just crushes my chest and I go flying off-screen for real. And I'm gasping and wheezing for air during the rest of the take. I got a massive bruise on my chest that was probably there for a month or six weeks. The scene finishes shooting, Kilmer walks off. Everyone is just sort of surprised because he clearly knocked the wind out of me and he didn't even give a courtesy apology. I was supposed to land on the bag, but he had kicked me so hard that I went over it, and I hit the floor. I wasn't seriously injured, but it's one of those situations where you are expected to actually say something afterwards. Like a week later, I'm standing on set and Val is talking to the stunt coordinator next to me. The coordinator is explaining the scene and he's like stressing that Val needs to be sure he does the practice runs of this stunt because he's already beaten up two of the stuntmen. And Val acts surprised, like he's done nothing wrong. And the stunt guy sort of pull the top of my shirt down a little and shows the top of this massive bruise. Val just sort of shoots the coordinator a glare and walks away.

And this kind of circulates for the week. He'd been in a really bad mood because word I think had gotten to him about Jim. Jim's salary, man, everyone was mad about it. Val thought he was the star. He was Batman, he was the guy in the title, so why was all the buzz about Carrey and Tommy? He didn't leave his trailer that much. I think he expected the movie to be one thing and it ended up being another for him.

He did apologize to me eventually. He came up to me in the Bat-suit, actually. And he has these raccoon eyes from the make-up under the mask, but the mask had to be taken off all the time because it was just so uncomfortable. Anyways, we were headed to a lunch break during a scene and eventually did apologize about knocking me on my ass."


so do you guys think my writing can improve?
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LeonhartFour
07/30/18 5:08:25 PM
#3:


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DeathChicken
07/30/18 5:09:39 PM
#4:


I believe the Val Kilmer part of that story is something like Val accidentally hurt the guy during a stunt and didn't apologize for it. Later when the accident was pointed out to him, he kind of glared like "Shut up"

Then later on he did actually apologize, so there's that
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DeathChicken
07/30/18 5:10:10 PM
#5:


And it's up there already, carry on
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 5:19:40 PM
#6:


I don't understand what your problem with me is. I came to the board that day, really excited to share something that happened in my shop because it had some minor significance to several older threads here on Board 8. And what we do on a message board is share and communicate. Instead, you have this bizarre dislike for me (despite never interacting with me ever before this event), and you made this assumption that I've made up a story that would be utterly, utterly pointless to make up. I also clearly said I was paraphrasing. I corrected some of the guy's grammar and I cut out some of the nonessential filler conversation during the stories as anyone would do if they were trying to distill the essence of a conversation.

I don't like someone impugning my character whether it's directly or indirectly, and if you have issue with me, be an adult and say it like an adult. Don't titter in the corner like a schoolchild. You're taking one of the rare instances in my generally mundane work life that was worth sharing and tarnishing it. It's not like I post that often with personal life information, and this just further suggests to me that it isn't worth it because bottom-dwellers on this board have to pervert something that generally was awesome for me into something I now will never bring up on the board because other people here will see this thread and, by association, think less of me.
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LeonhartFour
07/30/18 5:20:31 PM
#7:


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GranzonEx
07/30/18 5:24:08 PM
#8:


loooooooooooooooooooool
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woodman
07/30/18 5:24:25 PM
#9:


scarletspeed7 posted...
I don't understand what your problem with me is. I came to the board that day, really excited to share something that happened in my shop because it had some minor significance to several older threads here on Board 8. And what we do on a message board is share and communicate. Instead, you have this bizarre dislike for me (despite never interacting with me ever before this event), and you made this assumption that I've made up a story that would be utterly, utterly pointless to make up. I also clearly said I was paraphrasing. I corrected some of the guy's grammar and I cut out some of the nonessential filler conversation during the stories as anyone would do if they were trying to distill the essence of a conversation.

I don't like someone impugning my character whether it's directly or indirectly, and if you have issue with me, be an adult and say it like an adult. Don't titter in the corner like a schoolchild. You're taking one of the rare instances in my generally mundane work life that was worth sharing and tarnishing it. It's not like I post that often with personal life information, and this just further suggests to me that it isn't worth it because bottom-dwellers on this board have to pervert something that generally was awesome for me into something I now will never bring up on the board because other people here will see this thread and, by association, think less of me.

I think he's just continuing the meme of the story being posted every month with your new information instead
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 5:26:08 PM
#10:


woodman posted...
I think he's just continuing the meme of the story being posted every month with your new information instead

If that was true, he wouldn't have posted in the original thread that my recounting was actually false.
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Mr Lasastryke
07/30/18 5:31:54 PM
#11:


not sure why anyone wouldn't believe scarlet's story. i've met someone who worked on dunkirk not too long ago. stuff like this happens!
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 5:34:38 PM
#12:


LeonhartFour posted...
wow amazing story that is clearly a firsthand account

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LeonhartFour
07/30/18 5:35:57 PM
#13:


I was mocking you, not scarlet, for stealing his story and posting it without credit
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 5:38:39 PM
#14:


oh I know
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pjbasis
07/30/18 10:09:43 PM
#15:


I mean there are some obvious cheap shots at scarlet here, even if he's overreacting.

Also still very funny
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MariaTaylor
07/30/18 10:30:22 PM
#16:


GranzonEx posted...
I got to talking to him, and I learned he was one of the stuntmen in Batman Forever. He was specifically a thug under the employ of Two-Face, and he appeared in five different action sequences in the movies (for moments apiece).

GranzonEx posted...
Now there's this moment in the scene, you can watch, where he delivers this big booted kick to a thug's chest. And the thug goes off-screen and that's their entire spot in the fight. That was me;


I mean, there's a quick way to spot check the veracity of this entire thing. Did anyone ever go and look for that scene? Do we see the thug who got kicked in the chest? Scarlet, does he actually look like the guy you met IRL? Granzon, does this character actually appear in 5 scenes? Those are some quick ways to determine how much of this story is potentially true, unless the liar was very thorough on their details.
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 10:32:59 PM
#17:


this is the birth of a new b8 copypasta

a sex robot in an HBO show once said: if you can't tell the difference, does it matter if it's real or fake?
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MariaTaylor
07/30/18 10:34:31 PM
#18:


well I would never deny the wisdom of a robot but yeah, I'm generally someone who believes in the TRUTH instead of just saying whatever random bullshit
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TomNook
07/30/18 10:35:27 PM
#19:


Why do people always need to take easy shots at the emotionally unstable? No need to kick the man when he's down OP.
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:35:40 PM
#20:


MariaTaylor posted...
I mean, there's a quick way to spot check the veracity of this entire thing. Did anyone ever go and look for that scene? Do we see the thug who got kicked in the chest? Scarlet, does he actually look like the guy you met IRL? Granzon, does this character actually appear in 5 other scenes? Those are some quick ways to determine how much of this story is unless the liar was very thorough on their details.

If he's lying, he did a really convincing job. I watched the opening fight scene and it matches his little details, like the thug being kicked and falling down off-camera and that the thug had to wear a leather jacket while the others around him wore leather vests. I also saw a website listing the guy's name (Joe Kent) with a list of films he appeared in. It wasn't his personal website but I guess it's possible he gave that information to the website.

It would be a lot of work for such a minor thing to fabricate.
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 10:39:00 PM
#21:


I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?
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Underleveled
07/30/18 10:40:10 PM
#22:


I'm deeply confused by this thread. I don't know who's pointing fingers at who, who's making fun of who, and who's mad at who.

I know the context of the OP (scarlet's story) and that's it.
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woodman
07/30/18 10:40:42 PM
#23:


GranzonEx posted...
I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?

0, unless he was asked, which he obviously was
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:42:14 PM
#24:


GranzonEx posted...
I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?

It wasn't a week ago.

If you had read the thread, he came in looking at comics and I got into a conversation with him about his line of work. That's just standard conversation, getting to know people. When he mentioned he had appeared in Batman Forever, I asked him about his role and so forth. Because I myself was aware of the old Buffoonery stuff, I asked him if he was aware of any ill will between Jones and Carrey because I was curious and it interested me.
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:44:59 PM
#25:


GranzonEx posted...
50 years ago

Off by multiple decades.
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 10:45:38 PM
#26:


I honestly wouldn't even be able to tell you what I did after coming home from school after 9-11 happened, and I was in high school at the time

you're telling me this guy remembers this stuff from a job 30 years ago?

I don't doubt the guy worked on the movie, and visited your store
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Underleveled
07/30/18 10:47:49 PM
#27:


GranzonEx posted...
I honestly wouldn't even be able to tell you what I did after coming home from school after 9-11 happened, and I was in high school at the time

you're telling me this guy remembers this stuff from a job 30 years ago?

I don't doubt the guy worked on the movie, and visited your store

I couldn't tell you what I ate for breakfast yesterday, but I could recite word-for-word conversations I had about some random bullshit 15 years ago. People's brains are wired differently and people remember different things for different reasons.

You'd think working with Jim Carrey, Tommy Lee Jones, and Val Kilmer would be an experience worth remembering SOME details of.
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:50:46 PM
#28:


GranzonEx posted...
I honestly wouldn't even be able to tell you what I did after coming home from school after 9-11 happened, and I was in high school at the time

you're telling me this guy remembers this stuff from a job 30 years ago?

I don't doubt the guy worked on the movie, and visited your store

I'm telling you the guy appears to have worked on the movie, came into my store, and relayed to me information which I believed. If you don't believe him, that's fine.

I myself remember exactly what happened to me on 9/11. I was in 6th grade. I couldn't tell you what happened the day before or after. People recall information differently from one another.
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Underleveled
07/30/18 10:51:46 PM
#29:


scarletspeed7 posted...
on 9/11. I was in 6th grade

Oh hey I never even realized we were the same age.
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DoomTheGyarados
07/30/18 10:51:53 PM
#30:


Scarlet is one of, consistently, the best content creators on this board who has no need to make up fanciful stories.

This topic is just trash.
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:53:01 PM
#31:


Underleveled posted...
scarletspeed7 posted...
on 9/11. I was in 6th grade

Oh hey I never even realized we were the same age.

I thought I was a year older than you for some reason. Are you 27 or 28?
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Underleveled
07/30/18 10:53:53 PM
#32:


I'm 28, gonna be 29 in October. I thought you were a year or so older than me too.
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CoolCly
07/30/18 10:54:49 PM
#33:


GranzonEx posted...
I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?


man its a good thing you are here to just be a complete ass about it

it might not be true! I guess you better just go ahead and assume it isnt and ridicule him for it
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scarletspeed7
07/30/18 10:55:05 PM
#34:


Well, we're both 28!
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GranzonEx
07/30/18 10:56:28 PM
#35:


CoolCly posted...
GranzonEx posted...
I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?


man its a good thing you are here to just be a complete ass about it

it might not be true! I guess you better just go ahead and assume it isnt and ridicule him for it

thanks I'll be here all week
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Inviso
07/30/18 10:59:21 PM
#36:


You damn kids! Get off my lawn!
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Underleveled
07/30/18 11:00:37 PM
#37:


Inviso posted...
You damn kids! Get off my lawn!

It's my damn garden and I'm sick of you kids dressin up and havin your talks of betrayal in it!
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trdl23
07/30/18 11:02:14 PM
#38:


scarletspeed7 posted...
That's just standard conversation, getting to know people.

I have a feeling TC has no clue how any conversation works, much less a standard one
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norenxaq
07/30/18 11:16:51 PM
#39:


in: you need to be AT LEAST around my age before you can say that...
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Xiahou Shake
07/30/18 11:26:38 PM
#40:


This topic is a real head-scratcher. Like, why make this?

Scarlet's story was legit awesome, to the point that I even shared it with my IRL friends and they thought it was super cool as well. Honestly not sure why you'd be so resolved to try poking holes and ridiculing it this way outside of some weird insecurity.
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Leafeon13N
07/30/18 11:28:10 PM
#41:


I actually had to yell at some kids to get off my lawn a couple weeks ago what do i win.
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redrocket
07/30/18 11:31:53 PM
#42:


Leafeon13N posted...
I actually had to yell at some kids to get off my lawn a couple weeks ago what do i win.


A complimentary one year membership in AARP.
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LapisLazuli
07/30/18 11:35:17 PM
#43:


GranzonEx posted...
I've never heard of this Tommy Lee Jones meme until seeing it on b8 and googling it

what are the chances that some random extra on the set of a movie 50 years ago would go to a comic book store and specifically talk about this meme in great detail like it happened a week ago?


Uh, to be fair, the Tommy Lee Jones thing is extremely famous and people have been talking about it for over a decade now. Everyone I know with any knowledge of comics or superhero movies knows about it.
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MariaTaylor
07/31/18 12:20:56 AM
#44:


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greengravy294
07/31/18 12:51:10 AM
#45:


Im so confused.........
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TheGoddamnSanta
07/31/18 12:53:02 AM
#46:


GranzonEx posted...
I honestly wouldn't even be able to tell you what I did after coming home from school after 9-11 happened, and I was in high school at the time

you're telling me this guy remembers this stuff from a job 30 years ago?

I don't doubt the guy worked on the movie, and visited your store


dude have you ever left your house

In literally every single job I've worked, I've met someone in a relevant industry. When I was in Hollywood Video I met a 3-D modeler from the first Final Fantasy Movie, when I was in office depot, I met the guy who designed the cool cardboard boxes that file folders come in. Basically because every industry is so big, you're going to meet someone who did something noteworthy even working at a rinky dink small store in the middle of nowhere.

The reason Scarlett's story is so cool (even if it is fake) is because it's a very nostalgic reminder of working in retail. You would get someone in who was a little proud of something they did and they'd chew the fat with you for a half hour if it was slow enough.
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GranzonEx
07/31/18 1:30:07 AM
#47:


LapisLazuli posted...
Uh, to be fair, the Tommy Lee Jones thing is extremely famous and people have been talking about it for over a decade now. Everyone I know with any knowledge of comics or superhero movies knows about it.

I've been in the anime bubble for too long!

TheGoddamnSanta posted...
dude have you ever left your house

In literally every single job I've worked, I've met someone in a relevant industry. When I was in Hollywood Video I met a 3-D modeler from the first Final Fantasy Movie, when I was in office depot, I met the guy who designed the cool cardboard boxes that file folders come in. Basically because every industry is so big, you're going to meet someone who did something noteworthy even working at a rinky dink small store in the middle of nowhere.

The reason Scarlett's story is so cool (even if it is fake) is because it's a very nostalgic reminder of working in retail. You would get someone in who was a little proud of something they did and they'd chew the fat with you for a half hour if it was slow enough.

you got me dude

I haven't left my house in a decade, and the last time I worked a retail job Elon Musk's barber's cousin's son's friend shopped at my store and he spun this epic yarn about Elon Musk having a fear of pickles
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Kenri
07/31/18 1:33:38 AM
#48:


to be fair that sounds like a 100% plausible thing that might be true of specifically Elon Musk
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Mr Lasastryke
07/31/18 6:08:40 AM
#49:


GranzonEx posted...
I honestly wouldn't even be able to tell you what I did after coming home from school after 9-11 happened, and I was in high school at the time

you're telling me this guy remembers this stuff from a job 30 years ago?


"i can't remember shit like this so everyone else has to be like me" is a stupid argument. i can remember conversations i've had on this board in 2004 almost word-for-word. other people are like this as well, as has already been pointed out.
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Eddv
07/31/18 8:53:43 AM
#50:


I'm personally glad it was posted because I didn't see the 2nd post about Val
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