AITA...

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LinkPizza 06/28/19 1:59:23 AM #1:	So, I heard/read this reddit post. And I was wondering what you guys thought... AITA - I moved for my husband's job, my kids now hate me Asshole Bit long, stick with me. Throwaway because I'm active on a mom board, and haven't discussed this there. My ex and I split 5 years ago now. We had a daughter who is 16, a son who is 13 and a daughter who is 5. He's always been a good dad, and we split 50/50 custody, essentially the kids one week my house/one week his house. After my divorce, I reconnected with a high school boyfriend and fell head over heels in love again. He's in the military but hadn't had to move in years. We married 2 years ago. A year ago, he got orders to move to Texas from where we all were in California. My older two kids were not happy at all, and didn't want to move, while the baby didn't really express a preference. I approached my ex and told him the situation. I said I know the situation sucks, but we'd foot the bill to him for every trip to him on holidays, breaks, summers, etc. He blew his top and said absolutely not, I wouldn't "take his kids away" and said he'd see me in court. The judge ended up ruling in his favor, and I was awarded summers and every other holiday. I was absolutely devastated. I moved, and I've barely seen the kids since. They came at Christmas for a week, and it was tense the whole time. The older kids, especially my daughter, are short with me on FaceTime, while the baby gets distracted and can't chat much. My daughter has said I chose a man over her, and that she wants nothing to do with me, while my son won't talk about it but I can tell he's angry. I've asked my ex to talk to them about it and he basically said I chose to leave, it's my fault and he's not getting involved in "our issues". So, let me have it Reddit, AITA? My thoughts. I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. I think I may be biased as: 1. I'm in the military 2. I had parents who shared custody, and it wasn't a problem 3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well Not to mention, I see this pretty often with no real problems... And they even agreed to pay... But what do you guys think... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923955638] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>So, I heard/read this reddit post. And I was wondering what you guys thought... AITA - I moved for my husband's job, my kids now hate me Asshole Bit long, stick with me. Throwaway because I'm active on a mom board, and haven't discussed this there. My ex and I split 5 years ago now. We had a daughter who is 16, a son who is 13 and a daughter who is 5. He's always been a good dad, and we split 50/50 custody, essentially the kids one week my house/one week his house. After my divorce, I reconnected with a high school boyfriend and fell head over heels in love again. He's in the military but hadn't had to move in years. We married 2 years ago. A year ago, he got orders to move to Texas from where we all were in California. My older two kids were not happy at all, and didn't want to move, while the baby didn't really express a preference. I approached my ex and told him the situation. I said I know the situation sucks, but we'd foot the bill to him for every trip to him on holidays, breaks, summers, etc. He blew his top and said absolutely not, I wouldn't "take his kids away" and said he'd see me in court. The judge ended up ruling in his favor, and I was awarded summers and every other holiday. I was absolutely devastated. I moved, and I've barely seen the kids since. They came at Christmas for a week, and it was tense the whole time. The older kids, especially my daughter, are short with me on FaceTime, while the baby gets distracted and can't chat much. My daughter has said I chose a man over her, and that she wants nothing to do with me, while my son won't talk about it but I can tell he's angry. I've asked my ex to talk to them about it and he basically said I chose to leave, it's my fault and he's not getting involved in "our issues". So, let me have it Reddit, AITA? My thoughts. I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. I think I may be biased as: 1. I'm in the military 2. I had parents who shared custody, and it wasn't a problem 3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well Not to mention, I see this pretty often with no real problems... And they even agreed to pay... But what do you guys think...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheWitchMorgana 06/28/19 2:07:05 AM #2:	LinkPizza posted... I see this pretty often with no real problems... not... really sure how that matters since this was a problem immediately when the kids expressed they didn't want it --- formerly Kanakiri, Sefrig, etc. no longer into soda :( https://i.imgtc.ws/hzzfqsE.jpg <cite>TheWitchMorgana posted [p:923955828] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I see this pretty often with no real problems... </quote> not... really sure how that matters since this was a problem immediately when the kids expressed they didn't want it</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheWitchMorgana 06/28/19 2:08:43 AM #3:	i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was. --- formerly Kanakiri, Sefrig, etc. no longer into soda :( https://i.imgtc.ws/hzzfqsE.jpg <cite>TheWitchMorgana posted [p:923955877] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 2:09:17 AM #4:	TheWitchMorgana posted... LinkPizza posted... I see this pretty often with no real problems... not... really sure how that matters since this was a problem immediately when the kids expressed they didn't want it Yeah. But that's the thing. I don't think the mom should have to divorce her husband just so the kids can travel to see her easily. Nor do I think she should have to live halfway across the country from her husband. I mean, I think she deserves to be happy, as well... Plus, would they mean she would be able to tell the kids to stay in the state when they go to college, even if they want to go to one out of state? And if they refuse, they would be A-holes, too? TheWitchMorgana posted... i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was. But if they stayed where they are, and just visited (like they have to now), would that be fine. Also, I'm not stranger to moving and losing friends. I currently live halfway across the country from friends and family. I still visit. Would I like to see them more? \|Yeah. Would I want to live there and be miserable without my SO? Nope... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923955890] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>TheWitchMorgana posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I see this pretty often with no real problems... </quote> not... really sure how that matters since this was a problem immediately when the kids expressed they didn't want it</quote> Yeah. But that's the thing. I don't think the mom should have to divorce her husband just so the kids can travel to see her easily. Nor do I think she should have to live halfway across the country from her husband. I mean, I think she deserves to be happy, as well... Plus, would they mean she would be able to tell the kids to stay in the state when they go to college, even if they want to go to one out of state? And if they refuse, they would be A-holes, too? <cite>TheWitchMorgana posted...</cite> <quote>i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was.</quote> But if they stayed where they are, and just visited (like they have to now), would that be fine. Also, I'm not stranger to moving and losing friends. I currently live halfway across the country from friends and family. I still visit. Would I like to see them more? \|Yeah. Would I want to live there and be miserable without my SO? Nope...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheWitchMorgana 06/28/19 2:16:50 AM #5:	LinkPizza posted... I don't think the mom should have to divorce her husband just so the kids can travel to see her easily. Nor do I think she should have to live halfway across the country from her husband. she didn't LinkPizza posted... But if they stayed where they are, and just visited (like they have to now), would that be fine. that's what they did and now they rightly aren't happy with their mother LinkPizza posted... I currently live halfway across the country from friends and family. you're an adult --- formerly Kanakiri, Sefrig, etc. no longer into soda :( https://i.imgtc.ws/hzzfqsE.jpg <cite>TheWitchMorgana posted [p:923956030] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>I don't think the mom should have to divorce her husband just so the kids can travel to see her easily. Nor do I think she should have to live halfway across the country from her husband. </quote> she didn't <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>But if they stayed where they are, and just visited (like they have to now), would that be fine.</quote> that's what they did and now they rightly aren't happy with their mother <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>I currently live halfway across the country from friends and family.</quote> you're an adult</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 2:20:52 AM #6:	IDK. I just don't see the mom as an asshole in this situation. I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923956108] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>IDK. I just don't see the mom as an asshole in this situation. I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Kimbos_Egg 06/28/19 2:28:22 AM #7:	Mother has a right to her life and happiness, sure. But don't expect people to not only be supportive of your decisions, but be happy about it. If my mother left me and my sister, and i only saw her once or twice a year, id probably hate her too. My grandmother did that to my mother, and they were always tense. My mum loved my grandmother, but hated her too. --- You think you've Got problems? https://imgur.com/vgckRUN <cite>Kimbos_Egg posted [p:923956258] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>Mother has a right to her life and happiness, sure. But don't expect people to not only be supportive of your decisions, but be happy about it. If my mother left me and my sister, and i only saw her once or twice a year, id probably hate her too. My grandmother did that to my mother, and they were always tense. My mum loved my grandmother, but hated her too.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 2:34:10 AM #8:	They could see her more than twice a year. And normally, for the type of custody, I think they should. They split the big holidays. Things like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Fourth of July. And then breaks like spring break and different holiday breaks. Also, birthdays. I guess I just never understood hating someone for not being constantly around, especially when they didn't need to be. My dad was in the military and away for a while. He came back to visit on leave. It's just something that I was use to. Seeing him when he was home. And being with my mom was he was away. Like I said, I may be biased because of this. I just don't understand the reason to hate someone just because they aren't constantly around. Especially in this day and age where you can easily communicate over long distance. And when they said they would pay for planes tickets and such. But then again, I think I'm different than other people because I' close to my family. I know a lot of people on this site have said they pretty much hate (or don't care) about a good chunk of family members... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923956369] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>They could see her more than twice a year. And normally, for the type of custody, I think they should. They split the big holidays. Things like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Fourth of July. And then breaks like spring break and different holiday breaks. Also, birthdays. I guess I just never understood hating someone for not being constantly around, especially when they didn't need to be. My dad was in the military and away for a while. He came back to visit on leave. It's just something that I was use to. Seeing him when he was home. And being with my mom was he was away. Like I said, I may be biased because of this. I just don't understand the reason to hate someone just because they aren't constantly around. Especially in this day and age where you can easily communicate over long distance. And when they said they would pay for planes tickets and such. But then again, I think I'm different than other people because I' close to my family. I know a lot of people on this site have said they pretty much hate (or don't care) about a good chunk of family members...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
SpeedDemon20 06/28/19 2:55:06 AM #9:	I only read the first post, but I think there's a lot of groundwork that hadn't been established early on. It sounds like the kids don't really have a relationship with the boyfriend. If they saw her and her boyfriend happy together, they may be more understanding. I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation. But also, kids are little selfish **s, so I'm probably wrong. --- http://orig14.deviantart.net/59f8/f/2009/047/4/9/rylai_crestfall_by_eyue.jpg Crystal Maiden... gal could break your heart in a thousand pieces. -Rucks <cite>SpeedDemon20 posted [p:923956796] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>I only read the first post, but I think there's a lot of groundwork that hadn't been established early on. It sounds like the kids don't really have a relationship with the boyfriend. If they saw her and her boyfriend happy together, they may be more understanding. I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation. But also, kids are little selfish **s, so I'm probably wrong.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Mead 06/28/19 11:11:15 AM #10:	From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them --- If they drag you through the mud, it doesnt change whats in your blood <cite>Mead posted [p:923966884] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
wwinterj25 06/28/19 11:24:05 AM #11:	LinkPizza posted... I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. Yep she's a arsehole. Kids > anything in life I'd assume and I certainly wouldn't make it difficult for myself to see my own kids. I can't stand folk who create life and feel that said life can be picked up and dropped whenever they please. I'm especially biased when it comes to unfit mothers though. LinkPizza posted... 3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well You're going to say that though. The fact of the matter is having both parents in your life on a regular basses is the best outcome. Long distance only works for so much before it falls apart and when it comes to kids you should be their 24/7 or at least as close as you can be to that. I doubt his kid/kids would want him that far away if given the choice yet he's decided to choose to live far away from his kid/kids. That's a arsehole move. LinkPizza posted... I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead... Again your bound to think that as your BF abandoned his kid/kids for the most part to live far away. No kids would want their parents living far away from them as possible unless of course they are unfit parents from the start and in that case they shouldn't be creating life. --- One who knows nothing can understand nothing. http://psnprofiles.com/wwinterj - https://imgur.com/kDysIcd <cite>wwinterj25 posted [p:923967352] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. </quote> Yep she's a arsehole. Kids > anything in life I'd assume and I certainly wouldn't make it difficult for myself to see my own kids. I can't stand folk who create life and feel that said life can be picked up and dropped whenever they please. I'm especially biased when it comes to unfit mothers though. <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well</quote> You're going to say that though. The fact of the matter is having both parents in your life on a regular basses is the best outcome. Long distance only works for so much before it falls apart and when it comes to kids you should be their 24/7 or at least as close as you can be to that. I doubt his kid/kids would want him that far away if given the choice yet he's decided to choose to live far away from his kid/kids. That's a arsehole move. <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead...</quote> Again your bound to think that as your BF abandoned his kid/kids for the most part to live far away. No kids would want their parents living far away from them as possible unless of course they are unfit parents from the start and in that case they shouldn't be creating life.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MrMelodramatic 06/28/19 11:25:38 AM #12:	Mom is an ass for sure <cite>MrMelodramatic posted [p:923967396] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>Mom is an ass for sure</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 12:06:06 PM #13:	wwinterj25 posted... LinkPizza posted... I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. Yep she's a arsehole. Kids > anything in life I'd assume and I certainly wouldn't make it difficult for myself to see my own kids. I can't stand folk who create life and feel that said life can be picked up and dropped whenever they please. I'm especially biased when it comes to unfit mothers though. But thats not what she did. She wanted to take the kids with her at first. And went to court. The judge ruled in favor of the father, which is the reason she couldnt take them. Its not like she wanted to go with out them. Thats just how the judge ruled. wwinterj25 posted... LinkPizza posted... 3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well You're going to say that though. The fact of the matter is having both parents in your life on a regular basses is the best outcome. Long distance only works for so much before it falls apart and when it comes to kids you should be their 24/7 or at least as close as you can be to that. I doubt his kid/kids would want him that far away if given the choice yet he's decided to choose to live far away from his kid/kids. That's a arsehole move. I understand wanted you parent to be close all the time. I also dont see that as a priority. On this instance, they are far. But not that far. Only a plane ride away. Or a day long drive, depending on what part of Texas. Having both parents in driving distance would be better, sure. But having contact with is more important. wwinterj25 posted... LinkPizza posted... I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead... Again your bound to think that as your BF abandoned his kid/kids for the most part to live far away. No kids would want their parents living far away from them as possible unless of course they are unfit parents from the start and in that case they shouldn't be creating life. Why do you assume my BF abandoned his kids? While Ive mentioned some stuff before, I dont think Ive ever mentioned his abandoning his kids... Especially since he didnt... Also, most kids normally dont want their parents far away (though some like it for specific reasons). But there are plenty who are ok with it. And it works. Some even dont mind moving. But want to finish their last year of school in a certain place. So just stay with a parent to finish school before moving back in with the other parent. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923968939] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I don't think she's the asshole, but a lot of people do. </quote> Yep she's a arsehole. Kids > anything in life I'd assume and I certainly wouldn't make it difficult for myself to see my own kids. I can't stand folk who create life and feel that said life can be picked up and dropped whenever they please. I'm especially biased when it comes to unfit mothers though.</quote> But thats not what she did. She wanted to take the kids with her at first. And went to court. The judge ruled in favor of the father, which is the reason she couldnt take them. Its not like she wanted to go with out them. Thats just how the judge ruled. <cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>3. My SO does the "Long Distance Parenting" and it works well</quote> You're going to say that though. The fact of the matter is having both parents in your life on a regular basses is the best outcome. Long distance only works for so much before it falls apart and when it comes to kids you should be their 24/7 or at least as close as you can be to that. I doubt his kid/kids would want him that far away if given the choice yet he's decided to choose to live far away from his kid/kids. That's a arsehole move.</quote> I understand wanted you parent to be close all the time. I also dont see that as a priority. On this instance, they are far. But not that far. Only a plane ride away. Or a day long drive, depending on what part of Texas. Having both parents in driving distance would be better, sure. But having contact with is more important. <cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. Or be happy for their mom that she found somebody.That's what I personally think. I don't think I'll ever see her as the asshole. And I just see the rest of the family as the assholes (except the baby) instead...</quote> Again your bound to think that as your BF abandoned his kid/kids for the most part to live far away. No kids would want their parents living far away from them as possible unless of course they are unfit parents from the start and in that case they shouldn't be creating life.</quote> Why do you assume my BF abandoned his kids? While Ive mentioned some stuff before, I dont think Ive ever mentioned his abandoning his kids... Especially since he didnt... Also, most kids normally dont want their parents far away (though some like it for specific reasons). But there are plenty who are ok with it. And it works. Some even dont mind moving. But want to finish their last year of school in a certain place. So just stay with a parent to finish school before moving back in with the other parent.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 12:08:45 PM #14:	Mead posted... From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923969054] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>Mead posted...</cite> <quote>From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them</quote> I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
MrMelodramatic 06/28/19 12:12:21 PM #15:	LinkPizza posted... Mead posted... From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway... Thats not why she divorced <cite>MrMelodramatic posted [p:923969203] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Mead posted...</cite> <quote>From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them</quote> I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway...</quote> Thats not why she divorced</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 12:15:13 PM #16:	MrMelodramatic posted... LinkPizza posted... Mead posted... From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway... Thats not why she divorced Im saying she would have to divorce her current husband so she could stay. She remarried, but her new husband has orders. So, staying close would most likely end in her having to divorce her current husband... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923969334] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>MrMelodramatic posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Mead posted...</cite> <quote>From the kids perspective, yeah she is She chose her happiness over being there for them</quote> I can understand the kids thinking that. Though, I think if thats the case, then they also shouldnt be allowed to move or go to college out of the state if they would rather their mom be miserable living close to them then happy, but a little further away. It sucks to lose someone you love. And to have to divorce someone because your kids cant stand you not being readily available all the time even when youre only going to see them half the time, anyway...</quote> Thats not why she divorced</quote> Im saying she would have to divorce her current husband so she could stay. She remarried, but her new husband has orders. So, staying close would most likely end in her having to divorce her current husband...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
wwinterj25 06/28/19 1:20:26 PM #17:	LinkPizza posted... But thats not what she did. She wanted to take the kids with her at first. And went to court. The judge ruled in favor of the father, which is the reason she couldnt take them. Its not like she wanted to go with out them. Thats just how the judge ruled. Yet if she wasn't planning on taking their kids away court wouldn't be needed. She known her kids didn't like the idea yet went ahead with her plan anyway. She basically gave up her kids for a bloke. On a side note: It's uncommon for a guy to get the judges favour although perhaps given what the kids actually wanted it's not a surprise. LinkPizza posted... I understand wanted you parent to be close all the time. I also dont see that as a priority. On this instance, they are far. But not that far. Only a plane ride away. Or a day long drive, depending on what part of Texas. Having both parents in driving distance would be better, sure. But having contact with is more important. You don't see it being a priority being close to your kids? Unless they are grown arsed adults I'd see it as being a major priority myself. Even then I'd probably want to be close to them. Just imagine if any of her kids were at deaths door and she was miles away. I feel bad for the kids. LinkPizza posted... Why do you assume my BF abandoned his kids? While Ive mentioned some stuff before, I dont think Ive ever mentioned his abandoning his kids... Especially since he didnt... Also, most kids normally dont want their parents far away (though some like it for specific reasons). But there are plenty who are ok with it. And it works. Some even dont mind moving. But want to finish their last year of school in a certain place. So just stay with a parent to finish school before moving back in with the other parent. Not living close to his kids is what you've said. That is what I'm referring to. "Long distance parenting" is part time parent at best and is a case of just making the most out of a shitty situation that the adult has inflicted upon the kid. Being ok with something and wanting something are two completely different things too. Being a parent your kids should come before anything no matter what way you want to dress it up as. "Parents" who dump their kids for their own selfish needs shouldn't pro create in the first place. You're going to disagree with this though obviously as your BF isn't far off from this woman(by your own admission). At least he hasn't made Reddit post about it though... or at least I assume he hasn't. Still people like this are indeed arseholes. Not the worse parents by any means but they are arsehoels none the less. --- One who knows nothing can understand nothing. http://psnprofiles.com/wwinterj - https://imgur.com/kDysIcd <cite>wwinterj25 posted [p:923971889] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>But thats not what she did. She wanted to take the kids with her at first. And went to court. The judge ruled in favor of the father, which is the reason she couldnt take them. Its not like she wanted to go with out them. Thats just how the judge ruled.</quote> Yet if she wasn't planning on taking their kids away court wouldn't be needed. She known her kids didn't like the idea yet went ahead with her plan anyway. She basically gave up her kids for a bloke. On a side note: It's uncommon for a guy to get the judges favour although perhaps given what the kids actually wanted it's not a surprise. <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>I understand wanted you parent to be close all the time. I also dont see that as a priority. On this instance, they are far. But not that far. Only a plane ride away. Or a day long drive, depending on what part of Texas. Having both parents in driving distance would be better, sure. But having contact with is more important.</quote> You don't see it being a priority being close to your kids? Unless they are grown arsed adults I'd see it as being a major priority myself. Even then I'd probably want to be close to them. Just imagine if any of her kids were at deaths door and she was miles away. I feel bad for the kids. <cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Why do you assume my BF abandoned his kids? While Ive mentioned some stuff before, I dont think Ive ever mentioned his abandoning his kids... Especially since he didnt... Also, most kids normally dont want their parents far away (though some like it for specific reasons). But there are plenty who are ok with it. And it works. Some even dont mind moving. But want to finish their last year of school in a certain place. So just stay with a parent to finish school before moving back in with the other parent.</quote> Not living close to his kids is what you've said. That is what I'm referring to. "Long distance parenting" is part time parent at best and is a case of just making the most out of a shitty situation that the adult has inflicted upon the kid. Being ok with something and wanting something are two completely different things too. Being a parent your kids should come before anything no matter what way you want to dress it up as. "Parents" who dump their kids for their own selfish needs shouldn't pro create in the first place. You're going to disagree with this though obviously as your BF isn't far off from this woman(by your own admission). At least he hasn't made Reddit post about it though... or at least I assume he hasn't. Still people like this are indeed arseholes. Not the worse parents by any means but they are arsehoels none the less.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
slacker03150 06/28/19 1:26:37 PM #18:	I don't think she is an asshole because she moved, I think she is an asshole because of her entitlement. --- I am awesome and so are you. Lenny gone but not forgotten. - 12/10/2015 <cite>slacker03150 posted [p:923972151] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>I don't think she is an asshole because she moved, I think she is an asshole because of her entitlement.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dynalo 06/28/19 1:34:37 PM #19:	LinkPizza posted... They could see her more than twice a year. And normally, for the type of custody, I think they should. They split the big holidays. Things like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Fourth of July. And then breaks like spring break and different holiday breaks. Also, birthdays For the young one, that's fine. For the older children... Not so simple. Fourth of July, Spring Break, Summer break. Don't you think these are times they would want to spend with their friends? It's great that the judge says they split holidays, but if the kid says "I want to stay here", that kinda takes precedence. She's not an asshole exactly, but she should have seen this coming a mile away. The fact that she even let it go to court after the kids explicitly said they didn't want to go tells me she was being a bit oblivious. As per your argument, it's entirely different for a child to move away from a parent than it is for a parent to uproot a child and force them to move across the country. If the child wants to go to college out of state, the mother is capable of moving to that state if she values being near the kids that badly (though I'd recommend not doing that...). The kids had zero say if the mother won the court case. Just pack up and move, we'll fly you to see Dad when it's convenient for us. --- Assassins do it from behind. <cite>Dynalo posted [p:923972460] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>They could see her more than twice a year. And normally, for the type of custody, I think they should. They split the big holidays. Things like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Fourth of July. And then breaks like spring break and different holiday breaks. Also, birthdays</quote> For the young one, that's fine. For the older children... Not so simple. Fourth of July, Spring Break, Summer break. Don't you think these are times they would want to spend with their friends? It's great that the judge says they split holidays, but if the kid says "I want to stay here", that kinda takes precedence. She's not an asshole exactly, but she should have seen this coming a mile away. The fact that she even let it go to court after the kids explicitly said they didn't want to go tells me she was being a bit oblivious. As per your argument, it's entirely different for a child to move away from a parent than it is for a parent to uproot a child and force them to move across the country. If the child wants to go to college out of state, the mother is capable of moving to that state if she values being near the kids that badly (though I'd recommend not doing that...). The kids had zero say if the mother won the court case. Just pack up and move, we'll fly you to see Dad when it's convenient for us.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
green dragon 06/28/19 1:45:08 PM #20:	I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation, but the mom is more in the wrong than the dad. I mean, she's the one relocating (ie, moving her children away from their friends and father). And even the judge sides with the dad, since he gave the dad most of the custody. sounds like there's more to this situation, though. Like why did the mom and dad split up? Maybe the mom cheated on the dad with high school sweetheart(midlife crisis situation)? Maybe that's why the kids resent her a little. --- . <cite>green dragon posted [p:923972891] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation, but the mom is more in the wrong than the dad. I mean, she's the one relocating (ie, moving her children away from their friends and father). And even the judge sides with the dad, since he gave the dad most of the custody. sounds like there's more to this situation, though. Like why did the mom and dad split up? Maybe the mom cheated on the dad with high school sweetheart(midlife crisis situation)? Maybe that's why the kids resent her a little.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Doctor Foxx 06/28/19 1:57:16 PM #21:	TheWitchMorgana posted... i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was. I had this happen at 10 and 15 for similar reasons. My mom dated someone then moved us, they split a few years later, then she married someone else and moved us to a different small town part way through high school. It was shitty to uproot children for a relationship both times --- Not a doctor. Shh! <cite>Doctor Foxx posted [p:923973387] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>TheWitchMorgana posted...</cite> <quote>i had to be uprooted from my hometown to a place where i had no connections and didn't like the environment when i was 16 and even though it wasn't this situation i definitely would have resented my mother if it was.</quote> I had this happen at 10 and 15 for similar reasons. My mom dated someone then moved us, they split a few years later, then she married someone else and moved us to a different small town part way through high school. It was shitty to uproot children for a relationship both times</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
scaler24 06/28/19 2:10:15 PM #22:	Once you have kids, all bets are off and they should be your first priority. If you didn't make your choice of SO based on their situation and needs, then yeah, I would consider you to be kind of an asshole. She married the guy fully knowing that moving for his job was a possibility, potentially jeopardizing the balance the kids, the ex and her had achieved these last few years. Divorce and not having your parents live together is already a fucked-up thing for a kid to go through. Are you also gonna ask them to pretty much abandon their father for your selfish needs? --- League of Legends: http://lan.op.gg/summoner/userName=Scaler PSN: LightningLoops <cite>scaler24 posted [p:923973879] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>Once you have kids, all bets are off and they should be your first priority. If you didn't make your choice of SO based on their situation and needs, then yeah, I would consider you to be kind of an asshole. She married the guy fully knowing that moving for his job was a possibility, potentially jeopardizing the balance the kids, the ex and her had achieved these last few years. Divorce and not having your parents live together is already a fucked-up thing for a kid to go through. Are you also gonna ask them to pretty much abandon their father for your selfish needs?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 2:10:55 PM #23:	wwinterj25 posted... Yet if she wasn't planning on taking their kids away court wouldn't be needed. She known her kids didn't like the idea yet went ahead with her plan anyway. She basically gave up her kids for a bloke. On a side note: It's uncommon for a guy to get the judges favour although perhaps given what the kids actually wanted it's not a surprise. Even if stable families, people sometimes have to move. Like for work. And once you reach the age of 13, you are given a little more rights in choosing which parent. Only a little, though... wwinterj25 posted... You don't see it being a priority being close to your kids? Unless they are grown arsed adults I'd see it as being a major priority myself. Even then I'd probably want to be close to them. Just imagine if any of her kids were at deaths door and she was miles away. I feel bad for the kids. I dont. Lots of people have to live away from kids for extended periods. Work, training, etc. In this case, shed live far away for a time. But theyd be able to come visit whenever they wanted. For the deaths door thing, that can happen with kids who live with their parents. Like if the parents went on a vacation, or were visiting family in another state, or just out of the state for a week for work. But I also know you dont have to live next door or down the street from you child at all time. wwinterj25 posted... Not living close to his kids is what you've said. That is what I'm referring to. "Long distance parenting" is part time parent at best and is a case of just making the most out of a shitty situation that the adult has inflicted upon the kid. Being ok with something and wanting something are two completely different things too. Being a parent your kids should come before anything no matter what way you want to dress it up as. "Parents" who dump their kids for their own selfish needs shouldn't pro create in the first place. You're going to disagree with this though obviously as your BF isn't far off from this woman(by your own admission). At least he hasn't made Reddit post about it though... or at least I assume he hasn't. Still people like this are indeed arseholes. Not the worse parents by any means but they are arsehoels none the less. I will disagree with this. I dont see it as part time parenting. He also didnt move. The wives were the ones who moved. But he couldnt move with them. He only moved after they had. And he even had main custody for a while. Many different times. He takes care of his kids all the time. He makes sure they always have money and clothes. And pays for them to come out to visit all the time. And stay stay for long periods. But thats because they also have family here. Either way, they would probably spend some breaks here to visit family. slacker03150 posted... I don't think she is an asshole because she moved, I think she is an asshole because of her entitlement. You think shes entitled? --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923973904] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote>Yet if she wasn't planning on taking their kids away court wouldn't be needed. She known her kids didn't like the idea yet went ahead with her plan anyway. She basically gave up her kids for a bloke. On a side note: It's uncommon for a guy to get the judges favour although perhaps given what the kids actually wanted it's not a surprise.</quote> Even if stable families, people sometimes have to move. Like for work. And once you reach the age of 13, you are given a little more rights in choosing which parent. Only a little, though... <cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote>You don't see it being a priority being close to your kids? Unless they are grown arsed adults I'd see it as being a major priority myself. Even then I'd probably want to be close to them. Just imagine if any of her kids were at deaths door and she was miles away. I feel bad for the kids.</quote> I dont. Lots of people have to live away from kids for extended periods. Work, training, etc. In this case, shed live far away for a time. But theyd be able to come visit whenever they wanted. For the deaths door thing, that can happen with kids who live with their parents. Like if the parents went on a vacation, or were visiting family in another state, or just out of the state for a week for work. But I also know you dont have to live next door or down the street from you child at all time. <cite>wwinterj25 posted...</cite> <quote>Not living close to his kids is what you've said. That is what I'm referring to. "Long distance parenting" is part time parent at best and is a case of just making the most out of a shitty situation that the adult has inflicted upon the kid. Being ok with something and wanting something are two completely different things too. Being a parent your kids should come before anything no matter what way you want to dress it up as. "Parents" who dump their kids for their own selfish needs shouldn't pro create in the first place. You're going to disagree with this though obviously as your BF isn't far off from this woman(by your own admission). At least he hasn't made Reddit post about it though... or at least I assume he hasn't. Still people like this are indeed arseholes. Not the worse parents by any means but they are arsehoels none the less.</quote> I will disagree with this. I dont see it as part time parenting. He also didnt move. The wives were the ones who moved. But he couldnt move with them. He only moved after they had. And he even had main custody for a while. Many different times. He takes care of his kids all the time. He makes sure they always have money and clothes. And pays for them to come out to visit all the time. And stay stay for long periods. But thats because they also have family here. Either way, they would probably spend some breaks here to visit family. <cite>slacker03150 posted...</cite> <quote>I don't think she is an asshole because she moved, I think she is an asshole because of her entitlement.</quote> You think shes entitled?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 2:11:01 PM #24:	Dynalo posted... For the young one, that's fine. For the older children... Not so simple. Fourth of July, Spring Break, Summer break. Don't you think these are times they would want to spend with their friends? It's great that the judge says they split holidays, but if the kid says "I want to stay here", that kinda takes precedence. She's not an asshole exactly, but she should have seen this coming a mile away. The fact that she even let it go to court after the kids explicitly said they didn't want to go tells me she was being a bit oblivious. As per your argument, it's entirely different for a child to move away from a parent than it is for a parent to uproot a child and force them to move across the country. If the child wants to go to college out of state, the mother is capable of moving to that state if she values being near the kids that badly (though I'd recommend not doing that...). The kids had zero say if the mother won the court case. Just pack up and move, we'll fly you to see Dad when it's convenient for us. Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923973910] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote>For the young one, that's fine. For the older children... Not so simple. Fourth of July, Spring Break, Summer break. Don't you think these are times they would want to spend with their friends? It's great that the judge says they split holidays, but if the kid says "I want to stay here", that kinda takes precedence. She's not an asshole exactly, but she should have seen this coming a mile away. The fact that she even let it go to court after the kids explicitly said they didn't want to go tells me she was being a bit oblivious. As per your argument, it's entirely different for a child to move away from a parent than it is for a parent to uproot a child and force them to move across the country. If the child wants to go to college out of state, the mother is capable of moving to that state if she values being near the kids that badly (though I'd recommend not doing that...). The kids had zero say if the mother won the court case. Just pack up and move, we'll fly you to see Dad when it's convenient for us.</quote> Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DrPrimemaster 06/28/19 2:26:03 PM #25:	Its not the move that makes her an a****, its that she was trying to make everyone do something that only resulted in happiness for herself. Even though no one else wanted it she still went to court for it. Thats why she is an a***. --- Metroids Suck <cite>DrPrimemaster posted [p:923974534] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>Its not the move that makes her an a**, its that she was trying to make everyone do something that only resulted in happiness for herself. Even though no one else wanted it she still went to court for it. Thats why she is an a*****.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dynalo 06/28/19 3:14:59 PM #26:	LinkPizza posted... Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems. Yes, but it's normal for kids to eventually leave the nest and move away. Sometimes it's across state lines, sometimes it's across the street. But eventually they will move away. It's just not true the other way around. Parents don't usually move away from their children (while they're still children). No matter what, the kids were going to be forced to move away from a parent. Either the went with Mom, and moved away from the father, or they stayed with Dad, and the mother moved away. No matter which choice is made, it's done because of the decision of just the mother. The father and kids had no say in the decision. The kids said they didn't want to move. The father said he didn't want the kids to move. The mother said too bad, and then is surprised when she ends up having to move without them and hardly sees her kids. I still don't think she's an asshole, she's just shortsighted. The kids are being kids and are harsh and emotional over it, but that's what kids do. They didn't want their mother to move either, but they didn't want to uproot their entire lives to appease her either. --- Assassins do it from behind. <cite>Dynalo posted [p:923976691] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems.</quote> Yes, but it's normal for kids to eventually leave the nest and move away. Sometimes it's across state lines, sometimes it's across the street. But eventually they will move away. It's just not true the other way around. Parents don't usually move away from their children (while they're still children). No matter what, the kids were going to be forced to move away from a parent. Either the went with Mom, and moved away from the father, or they stayed with Dad, and the mother moved away. No matter which choice is made, it's done because of the decision of just the mother. The father and kids had no say in the decision. The kids said they didn't want to move. The father said he didn't want the kids to move. The mother said too bad, and then is surprised when she ends up having to move without them and hardly sees her kids. I still don't think she's an asshole, she's just shortsighted. The kids are being kids and are harsh and emotional over it, but that's what kids do. They didn't want their mother to move either, but they didn't want to uproot their entire lives to appease her either.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 3:16:29 PM #27:	green dragon posted... I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation, but the mom is more in the wrong than the dad. I mean, she's the one relocating (ie, moving her children away from their friends and father). And even the judge sides with the dad, since he gave the dad most of the custody. sounds like there's more to this situation, though. Like why did the mom and dad split up? Maybe the mom cheated on the dad with high school sweetheart(midlife crisis situation)? Maybe that's why the kids resent her a little. There could be more to it than we know. And there may be more of a reason on why they split. Though, I feel they wouldnt mind the mom moving away if she cheated on the dad and split up the happy family... scaler24 posted... Once you have kids, all bets are off and they should be your first priority. If you didn't make your choice of SO based on their situation and needs, then yeah, I would consider you to be kind of an asshole. She married the guy fully knowing that moving for his job was a possibility, potentially jeopardizing the balance the kids, the ex and her had achieved these last few years. Divorce and not having your parents live together is already a fucked-up thing for a kid to go through. Are you also gonna ask them to pretty much abandon their father for your selfish needs? Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers. And staying can also be a part of certain career fields in the military. I mean, people have been trying to escape the base I work at, and only a few succeeded. Like 90% that work on the planes I work on can get off this base to save their life... some for 20 years. Which kind of sucks... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923976760] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>green dragon posted...</cite> <quote>I don't think anyone is an asshole in this situation, but the mom is more in the wrong than the dad. I mean, she's the one relocating (ie, moving her children away from their friends and father). And even the judge sides with the dad, since he gave the dad most of the custody. sounds like there's more to this situation, though. Like why did the mom and dad split up? Maybe the mom cheated on the dad with high school sweetheart(midlife crisis situation)? Maybe that's why the kids resent her a little.</quote> There could be more to it than we know. And there may be more of a reason on why they split. Though, I feel they wouldnt mind the mom moving away if she cheated on the dad and split up the happy family... <cite>scaler24 posted...</cite> <quote>Once you have kids, all bets are off and they should be your first priority. If you didn't make your choice of SO based on their situation and needs, then yeah, I would consider you to be kind of an asshole. She married the guy fully knowing that moving for his job was a possibility, potentially jeopardizing the balance the kids, the ex and her had achieved these last few years. Divorce and not having your parents live together is already a fucked-up thing for a kid to go through. Are you also gonna ask them to pretty much abandon their father for your selfish needs?</quote> Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers. And staying can also be a part of certain career fields in the military. I mean, people have been trying to escape the base I work at, and only a few succeeded. Like 90% that work on the planes I work on can get off this base to save their life... some for 20 years. Which kind of sucks...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 3:25:48 PM #28:	Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems. Yes, but it's normal for kids to eventually leave the nest and move away. Sometimes it's across state lines, sometimes it's across the street. But eventually they will move away. It's just not true the other way around. Parents don't usually move away from their children (while they're still children). No matter what, the kids were going to be forced to move away from a parent. Either the went with Mom, and moved away from the father, or they stayed with Dad, and the mother moved away. No matter which choice is made, it's done because of the decision of just the mother. The father and kids had no say in the decision. The kids said they didn't want to move. The father said he didn't want the kids to move. The mother said too bad, and then is surprised when she ends up having to move without them and hardly sees her kids. I still don't think she's an asshole, she's just shortsighted. The kids are being kids and are harsh and emotional over it, but that's what kids do. They didn't want their mother to move either, but they didn't want to uproot their entire lives to appease her either. Shortsighted, I can see. Though, since moving in a possibility with many careers, its hard to know whats in the future. And kids always seem pretty harsh to me, I guess. Or they can be. Either way, a tough decision had to be made by her. Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923977144] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Not always. I mean, moving is expensive. And not something people can just pick up and do. Even if you want to. And trying to do just that can ruin you financially. Also, in this case, not moving would probably cause a bunch of other problems.</quote> Yes, but it's normal for kids to eventually leave the nest and move away. Sometimes it's across state lines, sometimes it's across the street. But eventually they will move away. It's just not true the other way around. Parents don't usually move away from their children (while they're still children). No matter what, the kids were going to be forced to move away from a parent. Either the went with Mom, and moved away from the father, or they stayed with Dad, and the mother moved away. No matter which choice is made, it's done because of the decision of just the mother. The father and kids had no say in the decision. The kids said they didn't want to move. The father said he didn't want the kids to move. The mother said too bad, and then is surprised when she ends up having to move without them and hardly sees her kids. I still don't think she's an asshole, she's just shortsighted. The kids are being kids and are harsh and emotional over it, but that's what kids do. They didn't want their mother to move either, but they didn't want to uproot their entire lives to appease her either.</quote> Shortsighted, I can see. Though, since moving in a possibility with many careers, its hard to know whats in the future. And kids always seem pretty harsh to me, I guess. Or they can be. Either way, a tough decision had to be made by her. Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
scaler24 06/28/19 3:45:19 PM #29:	LinkPizza posted... Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers Moving with both parents is one thing, but you're basically asking for them to not only leave the only life they know, but to also not have a father for most of their lives if you move to another state after a divorce. At that point it's up to you to decide whether you value your career more than your kids, and people are free to judge your character based on your choice. --- League of Legends: http://lan.op.gg/summoner/userName=Scaler PSN: LightningLoops <cite>scaler24 posted [p:923978039] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers</quote> Moving with both parents is one thing, but you're basically asking for them to not only leave the only life they know, but to also not have a father for most of their lives if you move to another state after a divorce. At that point it's up to you to decide whether you value your career more than your kids, and people are free to judge your character based on your choice.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 3:51:29 PM #30:	scaler24 posted... LinkPizza posted... Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers Moving with both parents is one thing, but you're basically asking for them to not only leave the only life they know, but to also not have a father for most of their lives if you move to another state after a divorce. At that point it's up to you to decide whether you value your career more than your kids, and people are free to judge your character based on your choice. I dont think it would be most of their lives for all of them. The daughter was 16, and the son was 13. So, not most of their lives since they could mostly move in a certain number of years if they wanted to. It would have been more for the youngest, though. Though, for the career, it depends on the career. For the military, you still have a commitment if youre in. You cant always just not go. You can sometimes talk to someone higher up who can probably help depending on the situation, though. For other careers, you can sometimes choose. But just ended a career to not move can financially kill you, which is not good when you have kids and a family to take care of. Quitting so you dont have to move is all good and dandy... until you have to move to a smaller house in a different neighborhood anyway because you dont have enough to keep living where you currently reside... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923978320] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>scaler24 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Moving is a possibility for a lot of careers</quote> Moving with both parents is one thing, but you're basically asking for them to not only leave the only life they know, but to also not have a father for most of their lives if you move to another state after a divorce. At that point it's up to you to decide whether you value your career more than your kids, and people are free to judge your character based on your choice.</quote> I dont think it would be most of their lives for all of them. The daughter was 16, and the son was 13. So, not most of their lives since they could mostly move in a certain number of years if they wanted to. It would have been more for the youngest, though. Though, for the career, it depends on the career. For the military, you still have a commitment if youre in. You cant always just not go. You can sometimes talk to someone higher up who can probably help depending on the situation, though. For other careers, you can sometimes choose. But just ended a career to not move can financially kill you, which is not good when you have kids and a family to take care of. Quitting so you dont have to move is all good and dandy... until you have to move to a smaller house in a different neighborhood anyway because you dont have enough to keep living where you currently reside...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Dynalo 06/28/19 3:54:10 PM #31:	LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. --- Assassins do it from behind. <cite>Dynalo posted [p:923978438] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 4:01:44 PM #32:	Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923978751] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DrPrimemaster 06/28/19 4:40:16 PM #33:	LinkPizza posted... Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it. --- Metroids Suck <cite>DrPrimemaster posted [p:923980367] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 4:48:17 PM #34:	DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it. But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923980678] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it.</quote> But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheSlinja 06/28/19 4:50:34 PM #35:	what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole --- https://imgur.com/iueug91 <cite>TheSlinja posted [p:923980774] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 4:54:55 PM #36:	TheSlinja posted... what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923980951] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>TheSlinja posted...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DrPrimemaster 06/28/19 5:20:14 PM #37:	LinkPizza posted... TheSlinja posted... what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever... Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one. --- Metroids Suck <cite>DrPrimemaster posted [p:923981990] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>TheSlinja posted...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever...</quote> Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 5:22:51 PM #38:	DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... TheSlinja posted... what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever... Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one. I personally dont think she is one, though... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923982113] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>TheSlinja posted...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever...</quote> Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one.</quote> I personally dont think she is one, though...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
reruns_revenge 06/28/19 5:39:19 PM #39:	LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... TheSlinja posted... what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever... Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one. I personally dont think she is one, though... Yeah, but you're wrong. That is made evident by her asshole selfish attitude of "it would have been totally fine if I moved my ex-husband's children far away from him so he would lose our agreed upon 50/50 custody split and rarely be able to see them, and even though I forced him to go to court to protect his parental rights and enforce the custody arrangement and totally lost, I now get to cry and whine about how devastated I am that I did not get to do to my husband what I ended up inflicting on myself." She is an asshole. A pretty big one at that, with this attitude. Maybe you don't understand because you don't have children. Perhaps you should reflect upon that. <cite>reruns_revenge posted [p:923982732] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>TheSlinja posted...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever...</quote> Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one.</quote> I personally dont think she is one, though...</quote> Yeah, but you're wrong. That is made evident by her asshole selfish attitude of "it would have been totally fine if I moved my ex-husband's children far away from him so he would lose our agreed upon 50/50 custody split and rarely be able to see them, and even though I forced him to go to court to protect his parental rights and enforce the custody arrangement and totally lost, I now get to cry and whine about how devastated I am that I did not get to do to my husband what I ended up inflicting on myself." She is an asshole. A pretty big one at that, with this attitude. Maybe you don't understand because you don't have children. Perhaps you should reflect upon that.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheWitchMorgana 06/28/19 6:22:32 PM #40:	LinkPizza posted... I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. ok well, you haven't had to deal with this as a child, so what you think is irrelevant in this case. nobody forced you to join the military, and you joined knowing you might be relocated. you also are not married so your boyfriend is not legally tying you to anything, and you do not have children. and frankly if this is your attitude i hope you don't have children lol --- formerly Kanakiri, Sefrig, etc. no longer into soda :( https://i.imgtc.ws/hzzfqsE.jpg <cite>TheWitchMorgana posted [p:923984264] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. </quote> ok well, you haven't had to deal with this as a child, so what you think is irrelevant in this case. nobody forced you to join the military, and you joined knowing you might be relocated. you also are not married so your boyfriend is not legally tying you to anything, and you do not have children. and frankly if this is your attitude i hope you don't have children lol</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 6:45:31 PM #41:	reruns_revenge posted... LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... TheSlinja posted... what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever... Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one. I personally dont think she is one, though... Yeah, but you're wrong. That is made evident by her asshole selfish attitude of "it would have been totally fine if I moved my ex-husband's children far away from him so he would lose our agreed upon 50/50 custody split and rarely be able to see them, and even though I forced him to go to court to protect his parental rights and enforce the custody arrangement and totally lost, I now get to cry and whine about how devastated I am that I did not get to do to my husband what I ended up inflicting on myself." She is an asshole. A pretty big one at that, with this attitude. Maybe you don't understand because you don't have children. Perhaps you should reflect upon that. I dont believe I am. And I dont think shes an asshole... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923985152] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>reruns_revenge posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>TheSlinja posted...</cite> <quote>what the father "might" have done is irrelevant, its what the mom did do and thats what makes her the asshole</quote> And I dont think it makes her one... And I dont think its that irrelevant. But whatever...</quote> Her being an a**** doesn't make your boyfriend one.</quote> I personally dont think she is one, though...</quote> Yeah, but you're wrong. That is made evident by her asshole selfish attitude of "it would have been totally fine if I moved my ex-husband's children far away from him so he would lose our agreed upon 50/50 custody split and rarely be able to see them, and even though I forced him to go to court to protect his parental rights and enforce the custody arrangement and totally lost, I now get to cry and whine about how devastated I am that I did not get to do to my husband what I ended up inflicting on myself." She is an asshole. A pretty big one at that, with this attitude. Maybe you don't understand because you don't have children. Perhaps you should reflect upon that.</quote> I dont believe I am. And I dont think shes an asshole...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 6:46:43 PM #42:	TheWitchMorgana posted... LinkPizza posted... I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. ok well, you haven't had to deal with this as a child, so what you think is irrelevant in this case. nobody forced you to join the military, and you joined knowing you might be relocated. you also are not married so your boyfriend is not legally tying you to anything, and you do not have children. and frankly if this is your attitude i hope you don't have children lol I havent had to deal with it in the exact same way. But many probably havent. I did, however, have a dad who lived in Texas & Oklahoma when I was a child while I lived in MD. And I really dont care whether people think I should have children or not. Ive seen how people act on this board. And if youre saying that based on what little you know of me, then I would say the same for most people on this board. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923985207] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>TheWitchMorgana posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote> I think the kids should try to give it a real shot. Instead of immediately hating the idea. </quote> ok well, you haven't had to deal with this as a child, so what you think is irrelevant in this case. nobody forced you to join the military, and you joined knowing you might be relocated. you also are not married so your boyfriend is not legally tying you to anything, and you do not have children. and frankly if this is your attitude i hope you don't have children lol</quote> I havent had to deal with it in the exact same way. But many probably havent. I did, however, have a dad who lived in Texas & Oklahoma when I was a child while I lived in MD. And I really dont care whether people think I should have children or not. Ive seen how people act on this board. And if youre saying that based on what little you know of me, then I would say the same for most people on this board.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
AnnoyedCops 06/28/19 7:04:50 PM #43:	I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know --- formerly known as Snoopydance <cite>AnnoyedCops posted [p:923985906] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote>I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
scaler24 06/28/19 7:07:15 PM #44:	AnnoyedCops posted... I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know You don't think making her ex go through court after the kids specifically stated that they wanted to stay with their father doesn't make her an asshole? --- League of Legends: http://lan.op.gg/summoner/userName=Scaler PSN: LightningLoops <cite>scaler24 posted [p:923986001] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>AnnoyedCops posted...</cite> <quote>I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know</quote> You don't think making her ex go through court after the kids specifically stated that they wanted to stay with their father doesn't make her an asshole?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 7:07:28 PM #45:	AnnoyedCops posted... I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know Husband, actually. She got married to him. They say its because she moved with him after he got orders. Though, some say moving wasnt the issue, but assuming to take the kids. It depends on who you ask... --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923986006] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>AnnoyedCops posted...</cite> <quote>I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know</quote> Husband, actually. She got married to him. They say its because she moved with him after he got orders. Though, some say moving wasnt the issue, but assuming to take the kids. It depends on who you ask...</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DrPrimemaster 06/28/19 7:09:20 PM #46:	LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it. But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have. So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story? --- Metroids Suck <cite>DrPrimemaster posted [p:923986067] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it.</quote> But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have.</quote> So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
AnnoyedCops 06/28/19 7:13:30 PM #47:	scaler24 posted... AnnoyedCops posted... I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know You don't think making her ex go through court after the kids specifically stated that they wanted to stay with their father doesn't make her an asshole? Well if she wanted to move, it's kind of on both of them for not being able to reach an agreement on how to split time between the kids. I don't know from the story if going to court is more her fault or the ex's fault --- formerly known as Snoopydance <cite>AnnoyedCops posted [p:923986187] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>scaler24 posted...</cite> <quote><cite>AnnoyedCops posted...</cite> <quote>I read the story but I don't really understand what would make her the asshole except for maybe the fact that she just assumed she could take the kids with her to Texas. Like phrasing it as "I know this sucks" that way. Is it that she moved to be with her boyfriend and therefore spends less time with her kids now? I don't feel like that makes you an asshole. Maybe not a devoted parent, but I don't know</quote> You don't think making her ex go through court after the kids specifically stated that they wanted to stay with their father doesn't make her an asshole?</quote> Well if she wanted to move, it's kind of on both of them for not being able to reach an agreement on how to split time between the kids. I don't know from the story if going to court is more her fault or the ex's fault</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
LinkPizza 06/28/19 7:14:08 PM #48:	DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it. But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have. So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story? Im giving her a pass because I dont think shes an asshole. Not because of the dad. --- Official King of Kings Switch FC: 7216-4417-4511 Add Me because I'll probably add you. I'm probably the LinkPizza you'll see around. <cite>LinkPizza posted [p:923986218] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it.</quote> But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have.</quote> So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story?</quote> Im giving her a pass because I dont think shes an asshole. Not because of the dad.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
scaler24 06/28/19 7:31:22 PM #49:	AnnoyedCops posted... Well if she wanted to move, it's kind of on both of them for not being able to reach an agreement on how to split time between the kids. There's not much you can do to split time with the kids evently when one of the parties moves to another state. What ends up happening is one of them gets them for the majority of the year and the other gets them for most holidays. The latter is obviously not ideal to either of them, but if neither of them are willing to give in, it's up to the kids to choose and they did. Consider also that we're only getting her side in this story. If ahe manages to look this bad while telling the story herself, I can't imagine what her ex would have to say about this. --- League of Legends: http://lan.op.gg/summoner/userName=Scaler PSN: LightningLoops <cite>scaler24 posted [p:923986911] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>AnnoyedCops posted...</cite> <quote>Well if she wanted to move, it's kind of on both of them for not being able to reach an agreement on how to split time between the kids.</quote> There's not much you can do to split time with the kids evently when one of the parties moves to another state. What ends up happening is one of them gets them for the majority of the year and the other gets them for most holidays. The latter is obviously not ideal to either of them, but if neither of them are willing to give in, it's up to the kids to choose and they did. Consider also that we're only getting her side in this story. If ahe manages to look this bad while telling the story herself, I can't imagine what her ex would have to say about this.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
DrPrimemaster 06/28/19 7:32:06 PM #50:	LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... DrPrimemaster posted... LinkPizza posted... Dynalo posted... LinkPizza posted... Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully. I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them. Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it. But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have. So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story? Im giving her a pass because I dont think shes an asshole. Not because of the dad. Her wanting to be with her children and have them move with her is completely fine and valid and honestly it would make her a bad parent if that wasn't the case. But she should respect their wishes. You don't think it was wrong of her to try to force the kids to do something they didn't want to do? --- Metroids Suck <cite>DrPrimemaster posted [p:923986935] in Reddit pos... [t:77824666]...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>DrPrimemaster posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote><cite>Dynalo posted...</cite> <quote><cite>LinkPizza posted...</cite> <quote>Divorce her husband to spend probably just a few more years living close the kids (especially if they left to go to college out of state) and lose who she thinks is the love of her life, or move with her husband and hope the kids either move with her, or understand and come visit. It was a tough choice either way</quote> And she took the worst of the approaches - try to force the kids to come with her by taking the matter to court. I can guarantee you this would have gone much smoother if she just sat down with the kids (particularly the teenagers) and explained that she needed to move, and then offer up options for the kids. The result probably would have been the same, but the kids would hopefully take it a lot better if they feel like they had a choice in how things developed, instead of having to fight against what they were being told they had to do. They might still be upset at her, but at least they would be given a fair chance of understanding the situation fully.</quote> I agree that it probably would have been a better way to approach the situation. Though, we dont know how she told them.</quote> Sure, but we do know that after she did tell them she cared so little about their decision that she took their father to court about it.</quote> But either parent would have. The father said she wouldnt let them take the kids away. If the kids wanted to go, he would have taken her to court. We cant say that for sure. But based on what he said, he most likely would have.</quote> So you're giving her a pass because the husband might have done the same thing? With the only evidence of that being a quote from the mother's side of the story?</quote> Im giving her a pass because I dont think shes an asshole. Not because of the dad.</quote> Her wanting to be with her children and have them move with her is completely fine and valid and honestly it would make her a bad parent if that wasn't the case. But she should respect their wishes. You don't think it was wrong of her to try to force the kids to do something they didn't want to do?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Poll of the Day > Reddit post r/AITA... (+) Yeah! (+)

Poll of the Day > Reddit post r/AITA...