Current Events > Pastor Says Jesus Would Have 'Beat The Crap' Out of John Bolton

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Tmaster148
01/30/20 9:36:06 AM
#1:


https://www.newsweek.com/conservative-pastor-says-jesus-would-have-beat-crap-out-john-bolton-1484767

A conservative evangelical pastor has lamented not physically assaulting former National Security Adviser John Bolton when he had the chance, while insisting that Jesus Christ would have "beat the crap out of" Bolton for disobeying President Donald Trump.
Rodney Howard-Browne, who has previously visited the White House to "lay hands" on Trump, lashed out at Bolton over recent news that the former ambassador's upcoming book may confirm the existence of a quid pro quo between Trump and the Ukrainethe central issue in Trump's impeachment trial. The preacher suggested on Twitter that Bolton was a traitor deserving of physical punishment for not remaining loyal to Trump.
"You are a slime ball of the highest order," tweeted Howard-Browne on Wednesday, apparently addressing Bolton. "I should have knocked your sorry butt through the door of the Oval Office into the rose garden when I saw you. I would have gladly been arrested ... what a Benedict Arnold ... I am glad you were fired!!!"
Bolton was also accused of being a "globalist sellout" who is "disloyal to the President and loyal to the deep state." Howard-Browne has long been a proponent of conspiracy theories concerning a supposed "deep state" desperate to launch attacks against Trump, who he has compared to the Sylvester Stallone action hero character Rambo.

The preacher also claimed that Jesus Christ would have launched a violent attack on Bolton over the alleged betrayal.
"WWJD: He would have made a whip and beat the crap out of him!!!!" Howard-Browne tweeted.



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Twi1ightSpark1e
01/30/20 9:38:41 AM
#2:


Don't mess with Jesus
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spudger
01/30/20 9:40:04 AM
#3:


i hope that pastor enjoys hell
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K181
01/30/20 9:40:30 AM
#4:


Turn the other cheek, and then counterpunch the motherfucker. - Jesus Horatio Christ, 33 AD.

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pres_madagascar
01/30/20 9:43:35 AM
#6:


Christians are not remotely christ like lol

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DeadBankerDream
01/30/20 9:45:15 AM
#7:


Benedict Arnold did nothing wrong.
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DrizztLink
01/30/20 9:46:47 AM
#8:


I seem to remember Jesus getting physical like twice.

1. Because fuck fig trees.

2. Greedy rich fucks.

Now who in the story falls under a category....

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Mistere Man
01/30/20 9:50:44 AM
#9:


DrizztLink posted...
I seem to remember Jesus getting physical like twice.

1. Because fuck fig trees.

2. Greedy rich fucks.

Now who in the story falls under a category....
Remind me what happened on time 1 please?

My memory sucks and that sounds funny.

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spudger
01/30/20 9:52:41 AM
#10:


pres_madagascar posted...
Christians are not remotely christ like lol

i learned this as a child in sunday school
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action52
01/30/20 10:11:42 AM
#11:


Mistere Man posted...
Remind me what happened on time 1 please?

My memory sucks and that sounds funny.
IIRC Jesus comes across this fig tree that's really lush and green. So he goes to pick a fruit but there is none. Then he curses the tree and it soon withers and dies.

There might be other details I'm forgetting. Don't ask me to interpret, I always thought it was one of the most bizarre parts in the new testament.

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metralo
01/30/20 10:14:08 AM
#12:


Christians are really showing their real colors with trump.

Overwhelming pieces of shit who arent faithful at all and just dream of a fascist authoritarian government who tells them to stay in line.

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Mistere Man
01/30/20 10:15:28 AM
#13:


action52 posted...
IIRC Jesus comes across this fig tree that's really lush and green. So he goes to pick a fruit but there is none. Then he curses the tree and it soon withers and dies.

There might be other details I'm forgetting. Don't ask me to interpret, I always thought it was one of the most bizarre parts in the new testament.
No no that is fine and thank you I definitely dont remember that one, and yes it is bizarre imo as well.

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Foppe
01/30/20 10:17:45 AM
#14:


In the Old Testament, the symbol of the fig tree was representing Israel, and its message is that Israel has failed and will be destroyed, just as the fig tree withers and dies.

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Antifar
01/30/20 10:21:13 AM
#15:


The good thing is, these people will be normal again if Joe Biden wins
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SiO4
01/30/20 10:22:24 AM
#16:


Reads artical scrolls back up to tge top...nope not The Onion.

Damn we live in some interesting times.
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eston
01/30/20 10:22:49 AM
#17:


What if Trump Derangement Syndrome doesn't actually mean what they say it means?

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Shablagoo
01/30/20 10:28:26 AM
#18:


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tigerslashII
01/30/20 10:37:49 AM
#19:


Foppe posted...
In the Old Testament, the symbol of the fig tree was representing Israel, and its message is that Israel has failed and will be destroyed, just as the fig tree withers and dies.
I always thought the fig tree represented a failure to produce fruit in spite of being healthy and full. Like a church that has a ton of money but does nothing useful with it.

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#20
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Solar_Crimson
01/30/20 10:46:35 AM
#21:


Evangelicals in this country are insane and out of control.

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SmidgeIsntBack
01/30/20 10:48:55 AM
#22:


Antifar posted...
The good thing is, these people will be normal again if Joe Biden wins

What is the over/under on future stories of Trump fighting the deep state from outside the White House

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SiO4
01/30/20 10:52:22 AM
#23:


ClunkerSlim posted...

Sounds to me like its a warning to healthy males who dont produce offspring.


Maybe God was trying to prevent Jesus from a bout of Marathon pooping. Figs have been know to do that. Jesus was a busy man. He can't be tied down like that.

Then again I can't claim to know what is in the mind of the lord.
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ApathyBear
01/30/20 10:53:15 AM
#24:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q19qRUBj-ic

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LightHawKnight
01/30/20 10:54:06 AM
#25:


Is this old testament stuff?

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Shablagoo
01/30/20 10:58:03 AM
#26:


ApathyBear posted...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q19qRUBj-ic

...I led that man to the Lord right there.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commotio_cordis

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Bluebomber182
01/30/20 11:00:39 AM
#27:


ApathyBear posted...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q19qRUBj-ic


And he wasnt arrested for aggravated assault of a minor?
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Foppe
01/30/20 11:27:13 AM
#28:


LightHawKnight posted...
Is this old testament stuff?
Jesus was never in the old testament stuff.

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darkphoenix181
01/30/20 11:31:45 AM
#29:


Like he did the Roman soldiers crucifying him.
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darkphoenix181
01/30/20 11:33:01 AM
#30:


pres_madagascar posted...
Christians are not remotely christ like lol

Actually there are christians who literally have forgiven the murderers of their children and befriended them.

Like anything else, imposters and failure exists.
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EbonTitanium
01/30/20 11:33:06 AM
#31:


Evangelicals are getting closer to Fundamentalism.

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DezDroppedFreak
01/30/20 11:34:49 AM
#32:


ApathyBear posted...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q19qRUBj-ic
Lmaoooo

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HylianFox
01/30/20 11:42:41 AM
#33:


Did the article really have to point out that the pastor is conservative & evangelical?

That's kind of a given.

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spudger
01/30/20 11:45:04 AM
#34:


HylianFox posted...
Did the article really have to point out that the pastor is conservative & evangelical?

That's kind of a given.

fuck it. the more labels on these idiots the better.
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Solar_Crimson
01/30/20 11:46:08 AM
#35:


HylianFox posted...
Did the article really have to point out that the pastor is conservative & evangelical?
They don't always go hand-in-hand.

There are liberal pastors, and not all pastors or Christians are evangelical.

That's why I specifically make the distinction between Christians and Evangelicals.

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HylianFox
01/30/20 11:47:36 AM
#36:


Solar_Crimson posted...
They don't always go hand-in-hand.

There are liberal pastors, and not all pastors or Christians are evangelical.

That's why I specifically make the distinction between Christians and Evangelicals.

I was referring to this pastor, not Christians in general
When someone says "Jesus would beat the shit out of ___" you know what side of the fence they're on

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spudger
01/30/20 11:49:15 AM
#37:


Solar_Crimson posted...
That's why I specifically make the distinction between Christians and Evangelicals.

i think its disingenuous to do this though. its like splitting protestants and catholics. they all believe the same shit but like to scapegoat the other with labels.
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Monota
01/30/20 11:56:35 AM
#38:


action52 posted...
IIRC Jesus comes across this fig tree that's really lush and green. So he goes to pick a fruit but there is none. Then he curses the tree and it soon withers and dies.

There might be other details I'm forgetting. Don't ask me to interpret, I always thought it was one of the most bizarre parts in the new testament.

I thought I had anger issues xD
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darkphoenix181
01/30/20 12:05:24 PM
#39:


action52 posted...
IIRC Jesus comes across this fig tree that's really lush and green. So he goes to pick a fruit but there is none. Then he curses the tree and it soon withers and dies.

There might be other details I'm forgetting. Don't ask me to interpret, I always thought it was one of the most bizarre parts in the new testament.


This was a metaphor that he just got done visiting the temple of God were good fruit (good works that is) should be found, but he didn't find it there.
So he was going to destroy it that it never produce again.

It is actually easy to understand if you read the chapter and the context.

But critics of Jesus literally have to grasp at straws like this.
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