Poll of the Day > What happened to your high school crush?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Zeus posted...

I know that a few of the ones that had an (unreciprocated) crush on me didn't turn out well.

I'm certain they turned out better not having you in their life.


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One of the girls ended up like a lot of the girls around here do, pregnant in an abusive relationship cycle.

The guy ended up hitting rock bottom (from what I heard) but picked himself up. I chatted with him a bit at one point, and he did kinda imply he had hit rock bottom himself, but seemed to be doing pretty well now.

But then lost that phone number, and then phone service entirely. So I hope he's still doing well.

I think I heard that he died. But I haven't seen him in 20 years so I have no idea really.

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Far-Queue posted...

No fucking clue because I moved on and don't stalk people.

This, but with an added touch of "That was 25 years ago for me, and I don't even talk to most of the people I stayed friends with after high school."

Not everyone feels the need to have a Facebook page and obsessively keep track of all the people they went to high school with for the rest of their lives. Some of us just move on.

It also doesn't help that I didn't really HAVE "a" high school crush as much as I had about a half-dozen minor high school crushes, so it's not like I was ever all that super-obsessed over one single girl anyway. But I never bothered keeping track of any of them after we graduated, and I've been in a relationship with the same girl for more than 20 years at this point, so I really don't have those whimsical "Whatever happened to so-and-so?" moments where I'd feel the need to care.

I assume most/all of them went to college (or didn't), eventually met someone they liked, maybe got married (or didn't), maybe had kids (or didn't), and are either happy, sad, or dead right now.
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There were a few but I dated her for a bit while in high school. We broke it off amicably when I changed schools.

She's still in one of my friend circles so we still talk and there's no beef,

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She's fat and has worked at IKEA for like 20 years.

wwinterj25 posted...

I'm certain they turned out better not having you in their life.

Certainly hasn't seemed that way, but you're something of an expert on living a terrible life so I'll take your word for it.

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After years of being awkward best friends we finally got together, and are still together. It'll be 20 years this August.

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Zeus posted...

Certainly hasn't seemed that way, but you're something of an expert on living a terrible life so I'll take your word for it.

*shakes head* Things going over his head again. He's saying that even in spite of those things you said she's probably still better off.

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ParanoidObsessive posted...

This, but with an added touch of "That was 25 years ago for me, and I don't even talk to most of the people I stayed friends with after high school."

Not everyone feels the need to have a Facebook page and obsessively keep track of all the people they went to high school with for the rest of their lives. Some of us just move on.

It also doesn't help that I didn't really HAVE "a" high school crush as much as I had about a half-dozen minor high school crushes, so it's not like I was ever all that super-obsessed over one single girl anyway. But I never bothered keeping track of any of them after we graduated, and I've been in a relationship with the same girl for more than 20 years at this point, so I really don't have those whimsical "Whatever happened to so-and-so?" moments where I'd feel the need to care.

I assume most/all of them went to college (or didn't), eventually met someone they liked, maybe got married (or didn't), maybe had kids (or didn't), and are either happy, sad, or dead right now.

You make it sound like finding out that information would take so much more effort than it actually does. Provided you remember (and can spell) their full name, usually you can get find out what's become of someone with a simple google search >_>

Otherwise YMMV with relationships. I barely keep up with friends I made in college and high school, but my brother is still absurdly close with a friend he made in elementary school despite the fact the two of them haven't lived in the same state for at least a decade. Meanwhile most of the friends I keep up with these days are just people I've met over the last few years (and ever since the quarantine started, I haven't talked to them much either).

chaosbowser posted...

*shakes head* Things going over his head again. He's saying that even in spite of those things you said she's probably still better off.

*shakes head* I got where he was going with it, but apparently my response went over your head again. You see, I was doing this thing called a "comeback". Let me explain it, since you don't seem to understand the concept: Basically when somebody insults you, you respond with an insult in kind, generally within the same theme. So when Winter attempts to use a quality of life as an insult, I referenced his own quality of life as giving him an expertise on low qualities of life. I'm sure it seems very complex to you, but it's the norm... granted, you don't seem to understand norms, I should mention that this is also a comeback. You attempted to overexplain what happened as an insult by pretending I didn't get what he said, so I'm overexplaining what I did then overexplaining my overexplanation.

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It doesn't matter anymore.
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Sadly she passed away of cancer a few years ago at the age of 41.

Its a hell of a thing, outliving people you remember going to school with.

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I married her

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Zeus posted...

You attempted to overexplain what happened as an insult by pretending I didn't get what he said, so I'm overexplaining what I did then overexplaining my overexplanation.

Then let me overexplain again. I was also implying your comeback was shit since what you responded with was so weak it seemed like you completely missed the point.

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She moved back less than a year ago. Married with 3 sons and seemingly in much better health. Am happy for her.

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Black_Crusher posted...

Its a hell of a thing, outliving people you remember going to school with.

Beats the alternative... well, specifically the alternative of them outliving you.

chaosbowser posted...

Then let me overexplain again. I was also implying your comeback was shit since what you responded with was so weak it seemed like you completely missed the point.

Not much of an overexplanation. I'm not entirely sure you understand how overexplaining works. The point of overexplaining is to go into excruciating detail regarding the subject matter, to the extent that it seems like you're explaining the concept for the first time... and then going ten steps further. It also helps to reiterate or otherwise restate the concept, which means to use different words to drive the idea home. Of course, to overexplain, it helps if you understand the concept first, which I'm not sure you do.

If you're going to try to antagonize me, I'd prefer you bring your A game, which is really more like an average poster's B or C game. Right now I wouldn't even give you a C for effort, although I expect you were hoping for some D.

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I had a scholarship to play football so when I went off to school, we parted ways and I have only seen her once since then and she has a kid.

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We're both happily in other relationships, several states away from each other. Still Facebook friends though

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I actually ran into her at a local play (A Christmas Carol) about five-ish years ago in our hometown (which both of us had moved away from, but come back to during the holidays to visit family). Since the last time I'd seen her (university - we actually lived across the hall from one another in the dorms for a year), she'd gotten her doctorate, moved to Australia, and started working for one of the universities (can't honestly recall if she was a professor or was employed in some other capacity).

No regrets there. I asked her out when we were in uni together, but she wasn't into me, so she turned me down. With the benefit of hindsight, I think it probably wouldn't have worked out anyways. I do still occasionally wonder "what could have been", though...

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Zeus posted...

Beats the alternative... well, specifically the alternative of them outliving you.

Not much of an overexplanation. I'm not entirely sure you understand how overexplaining works. The point of overexplaining is to go into excruciating detail regarding the subject matter, to the extent that it seems like you're explaining the concept for the first time... and then going ten steps further. It also helps to reiterate or otherwise restate the concept, which means to use different words to drive the idea home. Of course, to overexplain, it helps if you understand the concept first, which I'm not sure you do.

If you're going to try to antagonize me, I'd prefer you bring your A game, which is really more like an average poster's B or C game. Right now I wouldn't even give you a C for effort, although I expect you were hoping for some D.

Once again. You've missed the point. There was not much more excruciating detail to go into. We were already so far down into parsing the information into easy to understand pieces that I couldn't have actually overexplained anymore than I already had. Nice try though bud.

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Zeus posted...

You make it sound like finding out that information would take so much more effort than it actually does.

No, I'm making it sound like my ability to give a shit about the subject is so low that even the minimal effort it would take to cyber-stalk people is too much (even aside from the fact that cyber-stalking people at all is a bit creepy/sad).

I've probably given more thought to the subject in this topic than I have over the last 20 years combined.
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ParanoidObsessive posted...

No, I'm making it sound like my ability to give a shit about the subject is so low that even the minimal effort it would take to cyber-stalk people is too much (even aside from the fact that cyber-stalking people at all is a bit creepy/sad).

I've probably given more thought to the subject in this topic than I have over the last 20 years combined.

I can't speak for everyone here, but I know because the first instance is just living in a small town and running into said person.

Second being that my ex talked to them and they asked him to give me their number and we were chatting. Along with unavoidable small town bs.

I didn't really put effort into it. The most effort I put in was reconnecting with an old friend that reached out first.

You act like people have to try to know stuff. Depending on where you live and if you stayed in touch you really may not need to. People stay in touch or reconnect after school all the time.

I find the idea of stalking people weird, but let's be real the definition seems to not even be the same person to person anymore.

Considering how unavoidable small town gossip was for a while, I'm actually surprised I don't know anything about the other crush I had. Can't say I even thought about her until this topic.

We hook up from time to time and our kids have play dates.

She's married and I'm close to being married?

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ChaosAzeroth posted...

You act like people have to try to know stuff.

No, I'm acting like -I- would have to try to know stuff.

At no point have I really generalized anything I've said to anyone else other than me, or shat on other people for bothering to keep track of people they used to know, by whatever means, for whatever reason. I'm just pointing out why -I- haven't.

About the most I did was kind of poo-poo the mentality that everyone needs to have a Facebook page and that everyone with a Facebook page has to be Facebook friends with everyone they ever went to school with, because there are absolutely people who think that way. But not everyone thinks that way, so there will always be people who actually have to actively investigate what happened to people they went to school with.

This is arguably a problem with Internet discourse in general, though - people read more into what someone is saying than what they're ACTUALLY saying, personalize it, then treat it as something of an attack and react aggressively to something that was never actually directed at them in the first place. Then the first person reacts to what they perceive as an attack, and then everyone winds up on the defensive and just kind of insulting each other. Which is why most Internet discussions and debates usually devolve into little more than shit-flinging pretty quickly.



ChaosAzeroth posted...

I find the idea of stalking people weird, but let's be real the definition seems to not even be the same person to person anymore.

That's because context matters. People may oversimplify or conflate terminology and confuse the discussion in the process, but "cyberstalking" (at least when it's not being used in a legalistic sense) has always generally meant little more than going out of your way to use the Internet tools at your disposal to track down people you would otherwise not be aware of.

At its most basic level, that includes stuff like tracking down Facebook profiles to see where someone is and what their personal details are (married, kids, etc), but it also goes into things like name searches that give you addresses, phone numbers, e-mail accounts, etc. Even if you never USE that information to contact or harass them (which is where the legal definition of the term comes into play), you're still effectively stalking them (even if they never find out, and you never doing anything with it other than sate your own curiosity).

Bumping into someone, or hearing gossip about them because you live in the same small town, or seeing what they're up to because you share Facebook friends, or other passive means of learning what they're up to really isn't what I'm talking about. I'm talking more about the impulse where you find yourself curious about someone you haven't really thought about for years, and then actively choose to go looking for information.
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Fair enough, my apologies.

I would say it's more of a misunderstanding on my part than anything.

Which basically hopefully will teach me (jfc can I type) not to try to engage while distracted.

ChaosAzeroth posted...

Fair enough, my apologies. I would say it's more of a misunderstanding on my part than anything.

No no, you're doing it wrong. You're supposed to make thinly-veiled insults about how I'm impotent or something, then we spend the next few hours sniping back and forth at each other until one of us gets bored. Then for the next month or so whenever one of us sees the other in a different topic, we just make snide insulting comments about each other.

The Internet has rules, Smokey! This isn't 'Nam!



~hugs~
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My biggest crush immediately scrubbed his socials after high school and followed me on instagram with an account he post like once a year on. I haven't seen his actual face in years though.

This skater dude I liked got super hot but... super weird as fuck. He's like tumblr imploded on itself and turn into a jesus looking figure who think he's special-sexual and artistic and I spotted him on grindr looking for only trans lol.

The one big girl crush I have is happily married and pregnant. She seems to be taking care of herself well. And honestly her man look fine as hell too lol

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PO can't even get a boner don't bother arguing with him

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Far-Queue posted...

PO can't even get a boner don't bother arguing with him

I mean even I am more happy then him so go figure.

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