Current Events > I need an girl advice

(+) Yeah! (+)

Ok, long story short:

i live in Japan, foreigner. Had a Japanese girlfriend for about a year. We had a bad breakup, but after time, we got really close and kind of became FWB. I still care about her a lot. It is confusing, but we are really as close as two people can get.

New girl enters the picture. We went out, had fun. She expresses interest, but being a typical Japamese woman, Im afraid she may want the typical Japanese relationship. You know, all image, married, not working, expects me to make enough for her to be comfy and do babies.

Now, I really care about the first girl a lot. However, we both kind of got burnt out on romance. We have a lot in common, and are different in just the right ways. She just cant do a relationship right now, but really likes me and respects me. New girl is nice, shows interest in a future, similar hobbies, and is nice.

Haalp which one do i do

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_____Cait posted...

which one do i do

Both, at the same time.

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I'm a dude, but imo nothing is more exciting than someone showing you their world of magic and the things they like.. especially if you're interested in knowing who they are and how they perceive things through that lens and vice versa

In fact, people feel more empowered to truly be themselves the more they get exposed and try new things.. I guess just be real about yourself and be open about what you feel about those traditional aspects and see what they say

The more you talk about it, the more you'll know - maybe they'll go along for the ride

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RedJackson posted...

I'm a dude, but imo nothing is more exciting than someone showing you their world of magic and the things they like.. especially if you're interested in knowing who they are and how they perceive things through that lens and vice versa

In fact, people feel more empowered to truly be themselves the more they get exposed and try new things.. I guess just be real about yourself and be open about what you feel about those traditional aspects and see what they say

The more you talk about it, the more you'll know - maybe they'll go along for the ride

Thing is,I dont agree with the traditional stuff. Im not rich, and if she expects me to give her that life, it will lead to a nasty Japanese divorce. Im not Japanese, so I would lose everything in this case.

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What was the cause of the break up with first gf?

Unite posted...

What was the cause of the break up with first gf?

Traumatic family event, she really too, it hard and her life started falling apart

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_____Cait posted...

Thing is,I dont agree with the traditional stuff. Im not rich, and if she expects me to give her that life, it will lead to a nasty Japanese divorce. Im not Japanese, so I would lose everything in this case.

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But honestly though, that (what you wrote) should probably tell you something >_>

Seems like you have it figured out tbh

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Just school days jt fam

Bumps for some CEgals to answer.

I noticed that T.C. mentioned nothing about their looks or their personalities.
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Cornhuskers posted...

Bumps for some CEgals to answer.

I noticed that T.C. mentioned nothing about their looks or their personalities.

First girl is cute, but older. I like how she looks though. Her personality is uh...... Damaged goods, but we are so close, Ive seen all sides of her.

other girl is cute, but kind of plain. Her personality is curious and naive, a bit i secure and i experienced.

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Date the second girl and have the first girl as your mistress only, you clearly tried with the first girl to make a relationship work out but it did not, time to give the second girl a chance at a relationship.

Make sure that the second girl is aware of what your looking for, do not lie to her if your not seeking marriage right now.

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Bump for time zone

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Well i'm on the east coast what about all y'all?
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Are you looking for a serious relationship?

If no then

RiKuToTheMiGhtY posted...

Make sure that the second girl is aware of what your looking for, do not lie to her if your not seeking marriage right now.

If yes: I would suggest to sort out your feelings with the first girl. There's at least physical attraction due to the FWB but is that only it for you or are there other feelings? Is that only it for her?

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Stick with the first girl your patience will be rewarded. The second girl your not too into it seems. You like her and she is a nice girl but she isn't the one you want a future with. You want a future with the first girl and you two are close anyways. You two sound more like life partners. The thing about relationships and boyfriend girlfriend titles is you feel like you have to live up to societies expectations. But we connect on so much more then that. You are connected with the first girl. The second one is jsut a fling and a mild interest.

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