Current Events > CE. I can't tell if I'm a piece of shit person or not

(+) Yeah! (+)

My job changed where I work alone most of the day. I like it but it also lets me self reflect. I... think Im a piece of shit person.

If you met me, I would probably come off as a nice person. I do lots of nice things I guess but I dont want to do any of it. I feel that my morals always carries me through all this stuff eventhough I dont want to. Ill Ive you many examples.

My niece is an only child with few friends because of COVID. Her Dad doesnt play with her much it seems. Spending time is more like watching TV together or something. I honestly never want to play with my niece. However, when I see her, my morals in my head get me moving and doing it often because.. its the right thing to do? I guess? I would feel terrible for not playing with her eventhough I dont want to, so I do it.

Another example is that Im at work right now. I absolutely dont want to be here and I was off. I picked this shift up because a coworker has a death in the family and no one else would come. No way in hell did I want to be here but here I am. I keep questioning why I even picked this shift up.

I also recently loaned money out to a friend who was in a major bind. No way in hell did I want to do that but once he told me his situation... I offered to help eventhough I didnt want to.

This is only a few examples of an endless list of examples. I cant tell if Im a good person or a piece of shit. If I didnt have decent morals then I wouldnt have done any of that. Since I dont want to do these things... then Im a bad person right? Doing it because your morals are kinda making you do it vs wanting to do it seems to be very different.

I dont know. Maybe Im overthinking this. I doubt anyone here will respond to this anyway.

Unknown6721 posted...

Maybe Im overthinking this

Ye.


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Unknown6721 posted...

Maybe Im overthinking this.

Correct.

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Unknown6721 posted...

Since I dont want to do these things... then Im a bad person right?

Nope.

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Good people do good things even and especially when they don't want to.

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No part of this makes me think you are a pos person. It sounds like you do the right thing in a lot of situations that you don't want to do. That's not how a shitty person acts.

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I feel like a shitty person, I better log onto my alt so no one judges me!

Honestly, youre doing what you feel is the right thing to do. Doesnt matter if you wanted to or not lol.

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this makes you selfless if anything
maybe youre feeling a little bit like people are abusing your kindness??

definitely not a shitty person

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The fact you don't want to do it but then do it any way makes you a better person than me. Well done.

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I feel better about it now that I brought it up. I guess morals guide everyone. I just felt like I was a bad person for not actually wanting to do the acts that I do

You're a good person you just don't know why you're a good person.

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--Zero- posted...

I feel like a shitty person, I better log onto my alt so no one judges me!

This is 100% correct lol

El Mexicano Texano posted...

You're a good person you just don't know why you're a good person.

This... makes sense

LivingLegend posted...

You really need a diary bro Its not even a joke, Im serious.

Why? What would that even accomplish?

@LivingLegend
That was a legit question BTW. I guess it could have came off as me being annoyed or something. Maybe I should get one of the benefit is there

Unknown6721 posted...

@LivingLegend
That was a legit question BTW. I guess it could have came off as me being annoyed or something. Maybe I should get one of the benefit is there

it can be very therapeutic to just write down all your thoughts. it helps organize a jumbled mind because it forces you to think out your thoughts one word at a time

not a pos btw, at least not for the reasons posted in the op, i think doing good things when you dont want to do them is actually the part that makes one a good person. only doing them when its convenient for you is nothing special

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Bananana posted...

it can be very therapeutic to just write down all your thoughts. it helps organize a jumbled mind because it forces you to think out your thoughts one word at a time

not a pos btw, at least not for the reasons posted in the op, i think doing good things when you dont want to do them is actually the part that makes one a good person. only doing them when its convenient for you is nothing special

Maybe Ill give it a try. I never considered it before. If it helps then why not I guess

Separating it into purely good/bad is pretty reductive and as you're experiencing, confusing. Imo stop that

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