Current Events > Every time NeonTentacles is WARNED, I feel sick to my stomach.

(+) Yeah! (+)

I have a custom script running on my PC that I commissioned a computer science student back in college to write, where it constantly refreshes GameFAQs to check the status of NeonTentacles's account. If the script detects the status has changed to "Warned" or "Suspended", it will send a text alert / email (in case I don't have my phone) and I can immediately react.

This evening was an evening like any other. I was hanging out at my crib (street vernacular for "house") with some of my friends and we were watching Wednesday Night Football (we tape Monday Night Football and watch it on Wednesday) and drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade.

Let me tell you boys, we were are completely Hard (slang for drinking many Mike's Hard Lemonades) the entire time. I looked over at my buddy and I could see he had a Hard one right in the front of his pants! I thought that was funny because normally we put them on coasters on the table. I realized my own Mike's Hard was getting low and I said to my buddy "hey, can you toss me another Hard one?"

He informed me that we were all out and I'd have to get more Mike's Hards. I figured I could just have a swig of his and asked if I could put my mouth on his Hard one. He laughed, because we were both drunk and would normally never do this (because of germs; sharing a drink is disgusting), but eventually he gave in. I grabbed the smooth shaft of the bottle and just as I was about to put it in my mouth, my phone rang.

NeonTentacles was Warned.

I howled. I let out a howl so loud and piercing that it woke up my son. I normally make him go to bed on Wednesday nights at 5:30pm partially because I don't want him to see me getting Hard with other men (the kid doesn't need to be exposed to heavy drinking at his age) and also because he's an annoying little shit and is usually asking questions about football, as if he were a nerd or something.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. I didn't know what to do. I kept refreshing the GameFAQs page, hoping that this was some kind of mistake. Maybe some moderator was intending to remove a post praising the KKK but had accidentally clicked on the innocent NeonTentacles link. Alas, this was not the case.

By this point, my friends were all visibly upset and I noticed they were trying to leave, even though we were only part of the way through the game. "No!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I was inconsolable. I began thrashing about, throwing my collection of decorative throwing knives all over the crib (apartment). One knife struck my Native American friend, Big Bear Jim, in the neck. Blood gashed from his open wound, staining the carpet a deep red and splashing the walls. Blood was everywhere. A sickly iron scent loomed in the air as Death claimed Big Bear Jim.

My son knew he needed to act quick. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small crucifix. "Dad!" He yelled. "Remember how Christ died for your sins? Well, NeonTentacles did the same thing. He will live in our hearts forever, and hopefully in 3 days he will rise again from the depths of warned and post wonderful stories about titties on CE again."

At that moment, I knew my son was right. My rage quelled. I tossed Big Bear Jim's corpse into the dumpster and put my son into the Punishment Closet, as he had broken one of my most important rules of the house (never make eye contact with me).

Anyway, I really just miss NeonTentacles and I think the mods should reconsider his warning.

tl;dr - free NeonTentacles

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

It was for a joke topic about pitbulls >_>

RIP Big Bear Jim

Y

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain

My bad, dawg. That's JustYourOpinion

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

You throw enough shit on the posts and eventually some of them will stick

Pitbull discussions are like discussing politics, which is to say no matter your stance you're going to get someone super duper pissed at you.

Homie's got a kawakami banner so I'd say free the man he's doing God's work.

Pitbulls get to maul all the children they want and the miss still come to their defense smh.

Not a good look.

Cemith posted...

Homie's got a kawakami banner so I'd say free the man he's doing God's work.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/9/5/3/AAfWomAAD_XB.jpg

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/8/9/5/AAEhCpAACkhn.png

Questionmarktarius posted...

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/8/9/5/AAEhCpAACkhn.png

Not neon enough.

DKBananaSlamma posted...

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

It was for a joke topic about pitbulls >_>

And circumcision.

Paragon21XX posted...

And circumcision.

and circumcision

Damn. I missed the topix.

Neon Tentacles EvangeliWARNED

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


It's actually very hard on a site where the moderators are given complete discretion to determine whether something constitues a violation or not.

Cpt_Pineapple posted...

I am really sick of this guy with a million accounts posting their >_> face under every single account. Your accounts get banned and you still come back.

Can you give it a break? Or at least post all of your account names so I can block them all? Thanks.

Seriously it's fucking spam and it's unnecessary.

Is there a reason you can't stick to one account? Why can't you stay as Neon Octopus?

He only has two accounts and only uses this one when the main is warned.

DKBananaSlamma posted...

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

i don't look at profile much but god that's a patrician avatar/header combo if i've seen one

Good. Ass > Boobs.

DuneMan posted...

Pitbull discussions are like discussing politics, which is to say no matter your stance you're going to get someone super duper pissed at you.

And also like with politics, there is a right and wrong side and pissing off the wrong side is a good sign youre the right side.

SomeLikeItHoth posted...

Not neon enough.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/5/6/6/AAEhCpAAElmG.jpg