Current Events > ATTN: Formerly religious people of CE

(+) Yeah! (+)

Do you remember the first time your beliefs were challenged? How did it make you feel?

When did you finally give it up and what caused you to do so?

Cancer of family members & friends (some death), and students. I possess an angry, jaded, agnostic view that veers more atheist currently because of it.

The birth of far right media and rhetoric turns me off from it too.

I felt scared. When you believe something whole heartedly for awhile the thought that it's wrong or you have been lied to is quite terrifying. The fear often turns to anger and resentment and bitterness.

When is too difficult. My religiousness suffered a slow death by a thousand cuts. First giving up Catholicism, then Christianity then Theism entirely and along the way there were small deaths that paved the way for the bigger ones.

The biggest cause was just knowledge. The more you learn the less any kind of Theism makes sense. Then if you use Occam's Razor even Deism is untenable. Although I have no qualms with religious folks, only the institutions they follow and some of their beliefs and I lean towards true Agnosticism.

Knowledge and experience. I used to be Rush Limbaugh loving Christian conservative. But as I got out and got more life experience, I realized that all this scary stuff they say is happening, isn't. Conservatives and Christians lie to you constantly to keep you scared, dumb and dependent. Like democrats never seized guns, there was no liberal indoctrination center in college. It was a gradual realization.

I had my first doubts when I learned about Greek and Norse mythology and how these were religions that used to be practiced back then, but aren't really anymore. My thoughts were "If there were other religions that came and went, how is Christianity any different? I still believed, but that made me think.

As silly as this might sound, listening to some stand up comics like George Carlin and others as a teenager that would make fun of and point out the inconsistencies and hypocrisies of religion made me think too. Then a bit later when I learned more about Christianity itself and how messed up its history and its current followers are, it soured the whole thing for me.

LSGW_Zephyra posted...

I felt scared. When you believe something whole heartedly for awhile the thought that it's wrong or you have been lied to is quite terrifying. The fear often turns to anger and resentment and bitterness.

When is too difficult. My religiousness suffered a slow death by a thousand cuts. First giving up Catholicism, then Christianity then Theism entirely and along the way there were small deaths that paved the way for the bigger ones.

The biggest cause was just knowledge. The more you learn the less any kind of Theism makes sense. Then if you use Occam's Razor even Deism is untenable. Although I have no qualms with religious folks, only the institutions they follow and some of their beliefs and I lean towards true Agnosticism.

This feels very similar to my experience.

Southernfatman posted...

I had my first doubts when I learned about Greek and Norse mythology and how these were religions that used to be practiced back then, but aren't really anymore. My thoughts were "If there were other religions that came and went, how is Christianity any different? I still believed, but that made me think.

As silly as this might sound, listening to some stand up comics like George Carlin and others as a teenager that would make fun of and point out the inconsistencies and hypocrisies of religion made me think too. Then a bit later when I learned more about Christianity itself and how messed up its history and its current followers are, it soured the whole thing for me.

Comedians like Carlin were definitely a factor for my loss of religion as well lol

I grew up in a Christian household, however I'm gay and many bigots love using religion to hate on lgbt+ people which made my faith fade away

LonelyStoner posted...

Comedians like Carlin were definitely a factor for my loss of religion as well lol

Same. Although the biggest blow was learning about Christianity's history. I find it impossible to maintain belief that Christianity could be correct in light of it. Just listening to different Christian sects debate their own religion will give you that impression. Like learning about early Christian schisms was wild and even just how the Bible was assembled was a thing. Not sure how you can maintain divinity when so many of the core tenants were settled through bribery and skullduggery.

LSGW_Zephyra posted...

Same. Although the biggest blow was learning about Christianity's history. I find it impossible to maintain belief that Christianity could be correct in light of it. Just listening to different Christian sects debate their own religion will give you that impression. Like learning about early Christian schisms was wild and even just how the Bible was assembled was a thing. Not sure how you can maintain divinity when so many of the core tenants were settled through bribery and skullduggery.

I am unfamiliar with how the Bible was assembled. Ive never really thought about it. Mostly because I subconsciously knew I wouldnt like the answer.

Not really. There's wasn't a specific moment or anything. I have vague memories of walking home in like 5th grade having internal conversations with God about why bad things happen. Then there was a transition period away from being Catholic to believing in God but without a defined religion. Then in like 8th grade I was like "meh" I'm just gonna call myself atheist.

Edit: I'll expand a bit because I started questioning "God" when stuff I learned in Sunday school didn't mesh with personal beliefs. Mostly gay marriage, which was the hot button topic of the day and my thought process at the time was literally "well if God didn't like gay people why'd he make them?" So I assumed I knew better than the church people about what was right and wrong. And it all snowballed from there.

The cruelty that comes from so many supposedly religious people. Time after time when I ran into these people they were some of the most hated filled people all while having a smile on their face.

Also the fact that I was once sent to a retreat, and the people basically tried to attribute anything good happening to you to God and then anything bad happening to you as a "test." Which is stupid, because that means that people weren't evenly tested, and just seems like an excuse to dismiss your problems and tell you to pray the problem away (which is just another way to say "just deal with it") which doesn't take any active steps to help a person move passed the problem.

There's just far too many dismissive attitudes in the religion and too many people that find ways to say people are awful people for whatever reason and then use religion as a shield for their nonsense.

Being exposed to other people that weren't religious or were religious but not heavily influenced by it opened my eyes. I especially don't like how they treat LGBT+. It wasn't until later I found out that I would be considered part of the community, but even still, even when I was "straight," it still bothered me how there could be a cult of people that seemed to relish the fact that people would "go to hell" for it, and then decide that this made it okay to give them hell in their mortal existence for it .

Man, I'm realizing just how many things bothered me about it.

What really challenged me was the theory that somehow my god was the "true" god out of the various religions. It just didn't seem likely, and moreso with the absolute lack of credible proof that that god even existed. The more I thought about it, the less and less religion made sense to me.
How can a god that is said to love everyone allow children to be struck by diseases like cancer?
How can a god that is said to love everyone allow children to die at a young age?
How can a god that is said to love everyone allow women to be raped?
If that is "part of God's plan", it's one hell of an F-ed up plan.

LonelyStoner posted...

I am unfamiliar with how the Bible was assembled. Ive never really thought about it. Mostly because I subconsciously knew I wouldnt like the answer.

Popular acclamation mostly. Some were undisputed. The first ones being Paul's Letters Matthew and Mark iirc. Some almost didn't make it in (John and Revelations [Surprise Surprise]) and there were a few that almost made it in but didn't. Some Christian sects would later add them in (Maccabees). The entire notion of Sola Scriptura makes no damn sense but I digress.

Crushed515151 posted...

Cancer of family members & friends (some death), and students. I possess an angry, jaded, agnostic view that veers more atheist currently because of it.

The birth of far right media and rhetoric turns me off from it too.

Similar. My sisters passing I left briefly. I came back only to leave again in 2020. My experience with my friends family over money made me angry. They all claimed to be god fearing christians. They did everything in their power to ruin my life. Even when I was caretaker for my dying friend they pursued me. The final nail was my friends daughter. Her mother is on her death bed. Instead of putting the 30 year fued to rest. She did not. Also claimed to be christian. It showed me that people fake it. That they dont follow as they should. Why should I share a religion with people like that. I've been told that I'm going to hell. Just proof that I shouldnt have to be scared and guiltied into rejoining. I'm done.

Sounds like it was more the people around them that made people want to leave. It's wild that there are so many similar experiences.

Everything to do with donating money to the church and learning what it gets spent on.

Seeing religion weaponized (from priests no less) for hate.

no pivotal moment or occurrence. i just realized that never really believed in any of it, so stopped considering myself religious

Seventh grade after my best friend killed himself.

I was obviously devastated, and the religious people in my life just told me that at least hes not suffering anymore and hes in a better place, and I decided that any god who would create burdens for a child so extreme that they take their own life isnt a god that deserves my belief.

then I started relating like the book of Job and wtf

LSGW_Zephyra posted...

Same. Although the biggest blow was learning about Christianity's history. I find it impossible to maintain belief that Christianity could be correct in light of it. Just listening to different Christian sects debate their own religion will give you that impression. Like learning about early Christian schisms was wild and even just how the Bible was assembled was a thing. Not sure how you can maintain divinity when so many of the core tenants were settled through bribery and skullduggery.

Honestly this. The more and more interested I became to learning about Christianity the more I start to see just how man-made it really was.

Some of my friends call me an asshole because I still lie to my parents that I'm a practicing Southern Baptist, but I just can't bring myself to tell them the truth that I'm an atheist because I know my mom would get a heart attack. I love them too much to say the truth to them.

It wasn't a single moment for me, but a lot of thought put into the nonsensical things I've seen in my lifetime.

• The bible was used to justify slavery and Jim Crow laws
• The rampant child molestation scandal
• Outspoken Christians are some of the most bigoted, racist, and judgmental people I've ever met.
• Working retail on Sunday afternoon was often the worst time to work because some people who came to shop after church were the worst customers.
• When I was little, my mom took me to the gas station down the street so we could get some snacks. We had stopped going to church by this time, but a pastor from a church we used to go to was there. He tried to convince my mom to start going back to his church. He failed, but he got visibly angry when she wouldn't commit to going back to his church.
• The whole "requirement" to donate 10% of your money never made sense to me. God doesn't need money. And often, the churches I went to had pastors with nice cars and houses, but the church didn't even have air conditioning in Texas summers.
• I went to Joel Osteen's church with some friends once. It was a bit jarring to see tens of thousands of people passing around collection plates for money to give to him.
• From what I've seen, a lot of Christians pick and choose which part of the bible they want to follow and turn a blind eye to other parts.
• Christian people using God as a shield for their own biases and racism and idiotic actions. God seems to always agree with what they want to do, if you listen to them tell it.
• Televangelists bragging about having private jets and the like. Kenneth Copeland looking absolutely insane when a reporter asked him about his plane(s).

Prestoff posted...

Honestly this. The more and more interested I became to learning about Christianity the more I start to see just how man-made it really was.

Some of my friends call me an asshole because I still lie to my parents that I'm a practicing Southern Baptist, but I just can't bring myself to tell them the truth that I'm an atheist because I know my mom would get a heart attack. I love them too much to say the truth to them.

Your friends are the real assholes. Not you.

My mother is Christian/Catholic but she didn't force her belief on me. As far as I can remember, I never believed in religion.

The nail in the coffin was when I was 8 or 9. I noticed how the local pastor discriminated my mom for divorcing from my family-ruining father (alcohol and debts). From that moment on I knew, that religion has no place in my life.

Nothing of the sort happened in my parish, but shortly after graduating from a parochial grade school was when news of abuse scandals in Catholic churches started really coming out in force, and I had enough of an exhaustion from going to church at least twice a week for close to a decade coupled with that to take a fifteen or so year break from it.

I have somewhat refound and further cemented my Catholic faith in recent years, but am very casual and non-practicing for the most part.

As far as I can remember I was always skeptical of it.

My family was Catholic and when I was very little I remember believing and going to church with them. But even from a very young age I always loved learning about science, such as astronomy, evolution, etc. and things in the Bible started to not make any sense to me.

I remember my mom put me in Bible study classes and put me through first communion, but I would constantly ask the nuns and priests questions about things that never made sense to me and I was NEVER satisfied by any of the answers. They made even less sense.

I told my mom I didn't like going to those classes and I didn't want to do the first communion. And she never forced me to again. Since then it was just a gradual path away from it. There was never really a big moment of epiphany.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

I still have my Student Life Bible (not that I read it. Its more of a memento, as you mentioned.)

I also still sponsor a kid in North Africa, but calling him a kid these days isnt quite accurate. Weve been pen pals for 15 years, but my monthly payments go towards his kids now.

My family was always lazy theist (Catholic mass only on Sundays, no prayers or religious iconography in the home, though), however I drowned in the second grade and all I saw was blackness. Not sure if I actually died or was just drowned not dead yet because I did have this floating sensation, which my body was doing I'm sure, however it was still enough.

And then growing up, while I don't really consider myself a good person, decent at best, I've seen some of the worst people in life be given everything I'd always wanted so easily and ungratefully , which told me either there is no god up there or they're a piece of shit as far as my life is concerned.

dont mind me
I believe in god but I admit I am a ****y Christian tbh
lets just say I have seen things that canNOT be explained and I nearly lost all faith few years back

but no, never again. I know there is something somewhere that I believe is indeed a higher power

if you rely on science, can I ask you what for?

When my daughter passed and the church was more interested in planning her funeral than helping my wife and I process the loss.

I remember clearly. As a kid, the overriding sense of my life was Fear. Sure I had joy and fun and the general expanse of emotions, but the background and undercurrent was always fear.

I was 8 years old in 3rd grade with an awful substitute teacher. She didn't want anyone to even ask questions while she rambled on about something irrelevant to the class and to life. I was so bored that, for a brief moment, boredom trumped fear. I could think clearly out of desperation to not be bored, which is anathema to an extremely ADHD child. And it just kinda hit me that I only believe in God because I'm afraid of death and unfairness, rather than having any logical, unemotional reason to believe. I went back to uncertainty and questioning myself after that, but I could never find a reasonable counterpoint this realization.

Growing up, pretty much everyone I knew was either Christian, or they just didn't talk about what they believed so I assumed they were Christian, because that just seemed like the default to me at the time. And while it wasn't exactly challenging my beliefs, the thing that started me down that path was coming to the religion board on this site back in the day, and seeing a bunch of people there who were atheists and at the same time were just normal people, many of them being kind people. Just that kind of realization that you can be a good person without being a Christian. It wasn't until a bit later that I actually stopped being a Christian, and that came more due to thoughts about how an infinite being didn't make sense to me, and even if it was somehow possible, the God of the Bible didn't come across as an infinite being to me, but if it weren't for that earlier revelation, I'm not sure I would have allowed myself to even follow that train of thought.

OriginalPlain2 posted...

if you rely on science, can I ask you what for?

We all rely on science everyday for basically everything around us.

OriginalPlain2 posted...

if you rely on science, can I ask you what for?

This reminds me of a post I saw from an atheist meme account I follow on IG. It went something like "There's been plenty of religious "truths" that have been explained away with science, however no science conclusions that have been explained away with religion".

A lot of gods exist because early humans were fucking stupid and ignorant to the world around them so they filled in the void on knowledge with superstition and magic. Apollo carrying the Sun across the sky on his flying chariot, Zeus hurling lightning bolts when he's pissed, Thor banging his hammer makes thunder, etc. Even getting into monotheism, I've seen a Biblical depiction of how the Jewish people viewed the Earth and they thought the sky was literally filled with water and when it rains it's because the "floodgates" open up.

OriginalPlain2 posted...

if you rely on science, can I ask you what for?

Literally all of modern society. I don't really want to go back to the hunter-gatherer lifestyle, but it's fine if you do.

When I was like 7 I made the connection that other religions existed and then when I asked my pastor grandma questions trying to figure out why ours was "the right one" I never got any answers I couldn't apply to the others.

After that it was pretty easy. I just kept asking all kinds of people about their religions and kept getting more or less the same answers from all of them, so I went "well, guess no one knows" and stopped caring about it.

Then when I was ~11 I started having insomnia so I wouldn't have anything to do at night but think, and during one of those sessions I started running all the variations and qualifiers I could think of and realized that I wasn't willing to drop my standards, and none of the gods or religions or faiths I'd heard of came anywhere close to meeting them and earning my worship or faith, so I "became" an agnostic.

KajeI posted...

After that it was pretty easy. I just kept asking all kinds of people about their religions and kept getting more or less the same answers from all of them, so I went "well, guess no one knows" and stopped caring about it.

Ah, reminds me of my time on the religion board. Any time you brought it up, it would result in a christian and a jew arguing about the arbitrary details of specific biblical passages.

I never went to church. I don't know why, but neither of my parents bothered taking me there, even though they're kinda Christians/Spiritual. I think it made it pretty easy for me to not care about religion, when I didn't know much of what was in the Bible anyway, and find myself firmly in the Atheist category by the time I was in my 20's.

I'm remember my best friend way back in Elementary School criticizing me because of that. He, unlike me, had to go to church with his parents every Sunday morning, and didn't understand others who were non-religious or didn't go to church regularly.

ShaneMcComez posted...

I never went to church. I don't know why, but neither of my parents bothered taking me there, even though they're kinda Christians/Spiritual. I think it made it pretty easy for me to not care about religion, when I didn't know much of what was in the Bible anyway, and find myself firmly in the Atheist category by the time I was in my 20's.

I'm remember my best friend way back in Elementary School criticizing me because of that. He, unlike me, had to go to church with his parents every Sunday morning, and didn't understand others who were non-religious or didn't go to church regularly.

A lot of people don't realize that they've been indoctrinated into their parent's religions because they start being taken as babies so they don't get a fighting chance to think for themselves. From basically the time they're born they're surrounded with these religious beliefs. Your example of how your Christian parents didn't take you to church so you never saw the point/value in it, as well as your best friend who grew up the exact opposite, is a sterling example of what I'm talking about.

It was more a matter of growing out of it for me. I realised it was bullshit about the same time I realised Santa was.

For me it wasn't some sort of tragedy, just the opening of my mind in college with more knowledge and information. Probably one of the reasons Republicans hate college.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

My necklace. It still is special to me because of the support I got. My mentor was a woman that got it for me that was a family friend.

Hard to say. I've always been one who insists on proof for me to believe something

At first I explored other religions like wicca because it seemed more nature worship and nature is something tangible I know exists. But they like want you to handmake every damn thing and I'm lazy.

I believe I fall under now what's called a theist agnostic. I believe something of a higher power exists I just don't think humans will ever truly know it. It could be a sentient god like being or just some force of nature that somehow created us.

mybbqrules posted...

When my daughter passed and the church was more interested in planning her funeral than helping my wife and I process the loss.

Holy shit.

seemed the same as santa claus, easter bunny, tooth fairy. sometime in elementary school. i thought everyone was "in on it" for a while--that people didnt really believe it but they liked the message or ethics or something.

figured that one out later.

To throw it out while my mother is still religious she pulled us out of church in the middle of a sermon and aside from weddings and funerals we haven't gone back to church.

It was because they where gay bashing. She didn't even know about me yet but as she said after that day church was apparently for the self righteous and all she needed was her Bible to worship.

I never was devout or anything, but I did explore with Bahai and Buddhism. Bahai was cool and I liked the people, then I learned about their views on LGBTQ+ and substance use, and that disillusioned me. Buddhism was fine and I will call myself Buddhist to get out of conversations I don't have, but I just don't feel the need to devote myself to a religion.

I got my own spiritual and moral beliefs and I'm certainly not atheist or agnostic, but there's wisdom to a lot of religions. Developing my own beliefs feels more authentic to my experience.

I'm not going to get into any specifics on the how and why for reasons.

To explain it as best as I can without going into specifics, was basically forced to be a believer which over time became a legitimate belief. I always believed in this higher plan business that I was told as well as believing "God" would always help and be there for me if I needed him.

Time went on and I found myself in a situation that I couldn't get out of, no one listened to me, so I turned to my beliefs because they would get me through it and help me and another.

Every day I asked for help, but it was never answered, that's the first time I heard the phrase I hate so much, "It's all part of his plan". I didn't understand it, I was just a kid, the idea that some omnipotent being would help me and be there for me was all I had. But, as a kid I held on to that, believing there'd be some good in the end.

But that good never came.

Years later I finally began to understand everything I believed was a lie. Confronted with this realization I went down a dark path, which if I had stayed on it would have ended really bad for me. It was through my best friend that I managed to get off the path I was on because no one and nothing else was there for me.

This is why I get so angry when people try to use religion, belief, faith, etc as an indoctrination tool, especially on kids. It's poisoning your mind, making you think everything that happens has some kind of noble purpose, it doesn't. It's about controlling you, making you a puppet.

That got a little longer then I intended.