Lurker > synth_real

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Topic	My legs are currently bound together with belts. AMA
synth_real 01/12/18 1:02:14 AM #9	Kaname_Madoka posted... synth_real posted... What's the safeword? The safe word is me taking them off. It's online stuff. I plan to sleep with em tho. inb4 "pics" If I found you like that, you'd be in cuffs and a ballgag real fast --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	My legs are currently bound together with belts. AMA
synth_real 01/12/18 12:58:34 AM #4	What's the safeword? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	My diarrhea ascended to the next level.
synth_real 01/12/18 12:41:31 AM #6	Maybe you should just buy some Imodium (if you can make it to the store, that is) --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Would you accept never having to poop but your rectum is always 60 percent full?
synth_real 01/11/18 11:45:26 PM #6	So, you would basically feel like you always needed to poop, but not that badly? So what happens if you engage in anal sex? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	LegalFling: Swedish App where you swipe to give sexual consent
synth_real 01/11/18 11:41:10 PM #4	Darmik posted... Sweden considering changes to its rape laws where partners would have to get explicit consent via contracts before sexual contact What the fuck? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 11:38:53 PM #213	CensorErik posted... synth_real posted... Diablo Swing Orchestra 8/10 I knew from the name I was going to like it. Immediately from that first note I was thinking this is an 8 or better. Great pick! Just discovered the band today browsing around Youtube. Now let's switch it up for something deliberately dirty and abrasive: --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 11:26:26 PM #211	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 11:16:00 PM #210	CensorErik posted... 7/10 Is this from an anime or something? It's very weird, but in a good way. Love the instruments used. Violin and piano are my favorites, so mixing them with guitar and drums, when done right, is fantastic. Was going to give it an 8, but some of the male singing is quite grating. Yeah, his attempt at death growl isn't all that great, especially considering this band is from Quebec which produces lots of top notch death metal --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 9:29:27 PM #204	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	C/D A really attractive chick(or any chick really) with a medium-big size dog
synth_real 01/11/18 9:21:21 PM #7	If it hasn't been neutered, then probably --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Black Mirror inspired hypothetical: You get $100,000 in exchange for...
synth_real 01/11/18 8:40:52 PM #28	pegusus123456 posted... completely within their rights to torture the copy until they give in. Nope, couldn't do that to a copy of myself --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 7:15:21 PM #187	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Why do straight people think Vaseline is the right choice for buttsex
synth_real 01/11/18 1:32:44 PM #18	KILBOTz posted... hollow_shrine posted... Pogo_Marimo posted... Vaseline is a vascular constricting agent on soft tissue, which can create a more vulnerable skin surface as well as decrease sensitivity. You want to use an oil-based personal lubricant. I disagree. Use water-based. It's less likely to damage any silicon or plastic based prophylactics and is generally easier to remove after the fact. can you even find oil based personal lubricants? seems like anything marketed as such is water based. Boy Butter (it's coconut oil and an "organic silicone blend" whatever that means, so I'd assume not silicone toy safe) --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	You win a billion USD in the lottery. What do you do first?
synth_real 01/11/18 12:47:26 PM #58	Anarchy_Juiblex posted... synth_real posted... I'd start a sex toy company. We'd make the best buttplugs in the world. Good luck competing with njoy. I actually own one from them (XL size, of course) They're pretty good, but they don't vibrate, nobody makes a big vibrating plug that's actually any good (that I've been able to find, anyway) --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	You win a billion USD in the lottery. What do you do first?
synth_real 01/11/18 12:10:50 PM #21	I'd start a sex toy company. We'd make the best buttplugs in the world. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 10:32:57 AM #168	CensorErik posted... 6/10 Took way too long to get there. Was ok when it did, so a 6. Most Sunn O))) songs are slower than that, certainly not my favourite band but apparently they're good live and they play so loud it vibrates your whole body, the guys from the band are known to hand out earplugs before they start to make sure people don't get hearing damage --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/11/18 1:49:10 AM #163	One of the only three Sunn O))) songs I like --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	NSFW Do you play any instruments?
synth_real 01/10/18 10:03:36 PM #39	DrizztLink posted... synth_real posted... quinntotheflinn posted... synth_real posted... quinntotheflinn posted... synth_real posted... Guitar, drums, and of course the skinflute. Can you guess which one I'm playing right now? Skinflute :) Wrong Drums. That takes two hands Don't guitars also take two hands? Not necessarily, there are guys who can play two guitars at once. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/10/18 9:58:59 PM #156	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Who would actually take a cold shower?
synth_real 01/10/18 9:15:17 PM #11	It's good for when you need to wake up fast --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	NSFW Do you play any instruments?
synth_real 01/10/18 8:36:42 PM #32	quinntotheflinn posted... synth_real posted... quinntotheflinn posted... synth_real posted... Guitar, drums, and of course the skinflute. Can you guess which one I'm playing right now? Skinflute :) Wrong Drums. That takes two hands --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 8:26:52 PM #54	Blue_Dream87 posted... synth_real posted... But are you gonna name him Crowshit too? Maybe make him have a vendetta against the crowd that called him that? It's either Crowshit or an over the top edge lord name. Like maybe he decided to make a pact to strike down everyone in that audience, and won't shed his name til they meet their fate. He could even carry around little pictures of every single one of them that he had drawn from memory just so he wouldn't forget one --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	NSFW Do you play any instruments?
synth_real 01/10/18 8:20:34 PM #27	quinntotheflinn posted... synth_real posted... Guitar, drums, and of course the skinflute. Can you guess which one I'm playing right now? Skinflute :) Wrong --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 8:18:06 PM #49	But are you gonna name him Crowshit too? Maybe make him have a vendetta against the crowd that called him that? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	NSFW Do you play any instruments?
synth_real 01/10/18 7:59:47 PM #22	Guitar, drums, and of course the skinflute. Can you guess which one I'm playing right now? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 7:32:29 PM #32	ilfait posted... You should make him more edgy. Edginess is underrated right now. You know, after reading up on Raven Queen, it's gonna be pretty tough to make a drow follower of her who isn't a total edgelord, unless you make him unbearable cheery about death or something --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 7:07:20 PM #27	Blue_Dream87 posted... I'll be what his first audience called him during a disastrous performance. How about Crowshit then? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/10/18 5:11:58 PM #149	CensorErik posted... synth_real posted... Bauhaus 7/10 I liked this one too. Nice mellow, relaxing song. The video was cool too. This is their singer gone solo --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/10/18 4:40:42 PM #147	CensorErik posted... synth_real posted... Ghost 7/10 Nice song. Weird gimmick, but didn't effect the score. They're actually a metal band, but they also do semi-regular acoustic performances which I actually like better. Their frontman dresses up like the Pope of Satan, complete with robes and the big hat. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 11:45:50 AM #17	After looking up the College of Swords kit, just make him start practicing sword swallowing but have a bad gag reflex --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	How can I make my D&D character less edgy?
synth_real 01/10/18 10:45:38 AM #16	Which goddess? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Tennessee CHRISTIAN gets a STANDING OVATION after he admitted to RAPING a GIRL!
synth_real 01/10/18 10:30:22 AM #19	_Trojan_Tuvai_ posted... Local GAMEFAQS USER Full Throttle repeatedly SHITPOSTS on MULTIPLE MESSAGE BOARDS with SCARE CAPITALS like he's WRITING for a CHEAP NAZI TABLOID. https://www.gamefaqs.com./user.php?db=.2.user=Full+Throttle Look at his posts, he posts nothing but this crap. Are you new here or something? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/10/18 1:38:25 AM #145	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Men have to spend more than $40 for a sex toy can only be used a few times
synth_real 01/10/18 1:37:11 AM #27	MabusIncarnate posted... synth_real posted... I have a toolbox full of broken vibrators that says you're wrong Why would you keep broken vibrators in a toolbox? It's a cheap locking box. I bought it back when I was living with my dad and didn't want one of my stepsiblings to discover that shit if they ever went snooping around my room when I wasn't there. Ryo_the_Inferno posted... synth_real posted... I have a toolbox full of broken vibrators that says you're wrong Why do you keep them? Nostalgia? synth_real posted... was gonna do a funny prank with them, but now I'm just gonna leave it in the bush where the teenagers go to smoke dope and see what kind of dumb shit they do with them instead --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Men have to spend more than $40 for a sex toy can only be used a few times
synth_real 01/09/18 10:10:59 PM #14	BuckVanHammer posted... synth_real posted... I have a toolbox full of broken vibrators that says you're wrong Why save them? Gonna make a frankenbrator? Nope, was gonna do a funny prank with them, but now I'm just gonna leave it in the bush where the teenagers go to smoke dope and see what kind of dumb shit they do with them instead --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/09/18 9:59:35 PM #138	http://teamcoco.com/video/lillie-mae-web-exclusive-to-go-wrong --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Post a song you like and I'll rate it out of 10...if I can
synth_real 01/09/18 9:45:09 PM #135	--- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Men have to spend more than $40 for a sex toy can only be used a few times
synth_real 01/09/18 9:34:50 PM #3	I have a toolbox full of broken vibrators that says you're wrong --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	What is your single favorite video game EVER. Like EVER?
synth_real 01/09/18 9:31:21 PM #51	Baldur's Gate 2. I've never replayed an RPG as many times as I have that game --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Dawkins has been banned.
synth_real 01/09/18 7:57:06 PM #140	Burnt_Puke82 posted... synth_real posted... Was it ever explained who is recording these videos of Dawkins? I haven't watched most of them, but I have seen at least one that was obviously not being recorded by him. I don't know the one you're referring to, but everyone I've seen is being recorded by him. There's a few I haven't seen though so maybe he did have someone helping him out at some point. I think it was specifically the one where he went to some guys house and got beat up. I wouldn't be surprised if he had someone hanging around with him specifically to egg him on into becoming an even big trainwreck for their own entertainment at his expense. It's also a good example of why accessible mental health care is really the public's best interest. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Dawkins has been banned.
synth_real 01/09/18 7:48:45 PM #137	Was it ever explained who is recording these videos of Dawkins? I haven't watched most of them, but I have seen at least one that was obviously not being recorded by him. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Florida Man beats Stepson to death over cookie, forces his brothers to join in.
synth_real 01/09/18 1:09:55 AM #30	Sounds like he had the biscuit --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Jobs you can finish early and leave, but still get paid full shift?
synth_real 01/09/18 12:13:38 AM #11	Any job where you are poorly supervised, as long as you show back up at the end of your shift to clock out --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	The Prostate Orgasm
synth_real 01/08/18 10:21:44 PM #21	ProtoManSPx posted... synth_real posted... CrazyandLazy posted... Aneros helix there They have more models than just the helix. And all of them are too small for me. The best results are from something curved like a banana (but not an actual banana, don't stick fruits or vegetables up your ass) Why not Because they often have rough patches, stems, etc. that won't feel so good, along with all kinds of stuff on them that you might not want left behind in you. Buttholes are actually surprisingly sensitive to that sort of thing, despite what comes out of them. Also, do you really wanna watch someone eat a banana that was in your butt? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	The Prostate Orgasm
synth_real 01/08/18 10:11:17 PM #16	CrazyandLazy posted... Aneros helix there They have more models than just the helix. And all of them are too small for me. The best results are from something curved like a banana (but not an actual banana, don't stick fruits or vegetables up your ass) --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Why do people watch Pitch Perfect when they can just watch Glee?
synth_real 01/08/18 3:15:36 AM #4	Why do people watch either of them? --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	I think I'm going to quit my job without notice.
synth_real 01/07/18 12:52:23 PM #47	Dash_Harber posted... As I mentioned, he also has been told about his behavior before and told them to fuck off. Things are never going to get better in that place unless somebody does something to get that guy fired, and sadly a lot places aren't willing to fire someone in a management position unless their hand has been forced. The truth is, most companies care far more about their bottom line than their employees, and from the way you've described him, it sounds like he badgers his employees into doing more for less which is exactly what lots of boards of directors sitting in offices like. Go sign up for a temp agency or 5, at least one of them will find something for you. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	I'm playing Skyrim (NS) blind. My computer can't run it. spoilers
synth_real 01/06/18 12:41:28 PM #11	SSBBSB posted... 1. Can I upgrade these mage robes? You'll find better ones at higher levels, or you can just enchant your own. SSBBSB posted... 2. Is doing the main story a priority when I'm enjoying exploring? You can completely ignore the main story if you want to. You can do nothing but run around catching butterflies if it makes your heart content. SSBBSB posted... 4. I picked Breton. I just completed the college lesson where I used Lesser Ward. If I hang around the college, will I learn battlemage stuff? You won't get too many spells for free, you'll end up having to buy them. --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	You're invulnerable, except for 1 fatal weakness...pick which one!
synth_real 01/06/18 12:10:58 PM #25	Handshakes, I'd just tell everyone I'm a germaphobe --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
Topic	Nearly one-third of mass shootings involved a school according to the FBI
synth_real 01/06/18 12:04:18 PM #6	You've got hundreds or even thousands of targets all in one building, all nicely lined up at their desks, it's like a shooting gallery --- "I'm the straightest guy on this board. I'm so straight that I watch gay porn." - Smarkil
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