[Note: The first person to post CLAIM PIRATE KINGS GOLD will gain his lost gold. This does not count as your action but must be in a post by itself.]
masterplum walks up to the party and offers to sell them various magic trinkets, carried inside of a convenient Magic Make-up Box [1]. Nobody is buying, but he has a Magic Make-up Box now at least?
Sir Jawarius Maegos does all that **** Jawa said [1].
Ryu, the Family Man, looks around. Wow, nobody has noticed him even though he's been here the whole time! It's time to step up and get noticed! He puts on his distinguishing headband and walks over to JeffRaze, the de facto leader of the party.
"I'm ready to hel-" WHUMPF
Ryu is hit right in the head with a crossbow bolt and then repeatedly shot to pieces [3].
'hey guys watch these moves', DANT proclaims. he saunters over into the pass right after Ryu and THE SAME THING HAPPENS TO HIM [3]. Everyone kind of watches on in terror as this dude swaggers into a wall of crossbow bolts and is torn down in a matter of seconds. Wow.
[NOTE: I forgot to mention this before but Pirate King and DANT can make new guys to replace these characters since they survived the first dungeon and it'd suck for them to get cut out right away like this.]
[Note: The first person to post CLAIM DANT'S GOLD will gain his lost gold. This does not count as your action but must be in a post by itself.]
JeffRaze just sorta shakes his head in disappointment.
Ryokles heads over to the west pass 'hellloooooo?' she gets no response from Barrack Obama, which worries her. Even more, there's an ORc with a frying pan trying to cook her. She snatches the frying pan and BELTS HIM IN THE FACE with it, taking him out [1].
Yellow Priest Natwaf beseeches the heavens to revive every dead party member, forgetting that I put a rule of one target per action and also forgetting that I hate doing massive updates. He manages to pull off one miracle, parting the third wall, and then Maria literally crushes him with her thumb before zipping reality back shut again [3].
MegaWantGood trips over his own Tentomon whatever the hell that is and gets eaten by it [3].
Cremona marches into the middle of the clearing before the green gate, stands there, and ****ing dies for not posting a full action [3].
Seplito moonwalks up the steps and then forms a FREEZE spell, firing it down the East Pass. All Repeating Crossbow Bolts in the next phase will be nullified [1].
Jeff Zero and Jolteon move into the East Pass, taking cover along with JeffRaze [2].
Tom simply walks into the west pass. 'one does not simply walk into the West Pass', shouts Ryoko. However, Tom does so, because he is a crazy badass Monk. An Ominous Orc leaps at him and is quickly dispatched with a furious backhanded fist strike [1].
[NOTE: The Orcs have FALLEN BACK. West Pass no longer needs to be held on the next turn, although anyone who wishes to chase the Orcs may still gain Double EXP from Mass Combat]
edwardsdv doesn't really give a **** about walls, and walks right through the south wall into the room past the green gate [1]. A magical darkness covers the area, although he thinks that he sees a small figure in the blackness, he cannot make out its form. It does not seem to notice him.
BIGPUN9999 shuffles in and asks JeffRaze if he wants to buy the 'wound-healing salve' he is selling on eBay. A repeating crossbow barrage would have been aimed at him, but BIGPUN9999 is saved by Seplito's Freeze Spell. Lucky [3]!