Insurrextion 2001
Time for another UK PPV! All the matches are being changed. It's Linda's fault.
TURN IT UP
Grandmaster Sexay vs. Eddie Guerrero
Eddie gets the sunglasses, he tosses them to some lucky fan in the crowd. Grandmaster with a baseball slide and he does some dancing. Guerrero hits back and does a bunch of dancing too.
Power bomb from Grandmaster, he almost crushes himself during it. Missed leg drop, missed run, and Guerrero gets a rollup. He uses the ropes for leverage and gets a three count but Grandmaster's should wasn't even down until 2.
I'm sure glad we always get to see Stephanie and HHH talking and revealing their thoughts.
Terri's gonna wrestle in a 6 person tag match? Oh, she just wants a normal tag match.
Radicalz vs. Hardcore & Crash Holly
Molly tosses around Terri a bit and her skirt almost flies off. Crash ends up with Malenko in a bit, both former light heavyweight champs.
Michael Cole's called Saturn a machine twice now. Hardcore is stuck in before Crash comes in on a hot tag. He hits some hurricanranas before everyone's in. Terri and Molly come together again and Saturn hits the family gradunzel to win.
Another Regal segment already, gotta pump up the only british guy on the card.
This Queen's Cup looks like a Stanley Cup ripoff.
Test got hurt from Big Show the other day, their match isn't gonna happen. Big Show challenges Test anyway.
Big Show vs. Test
It's a good thing Test took his shirt off so we could see his taped ribs. Sidewalk slam and Test writhes around in pain. Reverse DDT and Test thought it was gonna be a suplex but gets in position.
Three refs are here to save Test and end this, Big Show taunts the crowd and his voice cracks. Nobody can beat him 1 on 1.
WAIT THIS MUSIC Bradshaw is here! A bell rings!
Big Show vs. Bradshaw
Test is on the ground with doctors, Big Show beating up Bradshaw with sidewalk slams and chops and body slams. Chokeslam coming, Bradshaw grabs the ropes though. Man, Big Show is slow.
Big Show's got a chair and wants to hit Test, Test with a boot, Bradshaw with a clothesline and beats Big Show. They took an awful idea for a match, and gave it a twist to potentially be good, and then booked it all wrong.
Holy christ this X Factor theme is awful.
Four team tag match: Edge & Christian vs. X Factor vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz
Hardys are in there for a while, first taking on the Canadians, then hitting some acrobatic moves to X-Pac. Bronco Buster is met with boos.
Jeff's running around hitting everyone, he clotheslines Edge and Christian, one of them should be tagged in now. Double team wait everyone's in the ring. Albert screws things up for his team, Swanton and X Factor is out. Quick unprettier, and Hardys are gone too.
Edge & Christian keep distracting the ref to work up heat for the hot tag. Nice drop toe hold into leg lock. Here's the hot tag, slam, wazzup, get the tables. Edge & Christian try to baseball slide the table and it was a setup.
RHYNO OUT OF NOWHERE GORE OUT OF NOWHERE Bubba is dead and Edge pins to win. Spike runs out and Rhyno gets the 3D through the table.
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ONLY FIVE CAN LADDER.
Sushi, kamikaze, fujiyama, nippon-ichi...