LogFAQs > #897761820

LurkerFAQs, Active DB, DB1, DB2, Database 3 ( 02.21.2018-07.23.2018 ), DB4, DB5, DB6, DB7, DB8, DB9, DB10, DB11, DB12, Clear

Topic List	Page List: 1
Topic	join me as I read through my recent haul of old bargain bin sci-fi novels.
turbopuns2 03/13/18 11:50:58 PM #11:	Alright so lovable Old John (real name Johann) interrupts the boys' attempt to test their invention on the football team's airplane by pulling a gun, forcing them each into separate bathrooms, and then welding the doors shut. But of course one of our heroes just makes a bomb using soap and plastic and easily frees all of them. They attempt to take back the cockpit and trigger their invention to transport them to a specific place which won't leave the plane with enough fuel to "fly to Russia or Siberia or Cuba". buuuut a miscalculation is made and we end up on Titan. Or just above it anyway. But no worries, perfect landing. Also while they are landing and the spy Johann is tied up, they literally convince him to desert and be on the American side in like 5 seconds. And he's immediately all fired up and ready to vote in elections and eat hot dogs at baseball games. (not making up examples here. he says these things.) Titan has life forms on it with "tentacles, hideous beaks, and four bulging eyes". And they start attacking the plane. Despite Titan being -200 degrees, the guys put on football uniforms, pads, and helmets, and go out onto its surface armed with the gun, the welding torch, and an emergency axe. Oh and they strap the emergency oxygen tanks onto their waists. This is like ghostbusters shit. Oh and pert Sally sews gloves out of cheerleader uniforms to keep their hands warm. wow. They slaughter so many Titanians that it forms a "forty-foot high mountain of corpses". They win the fight but Sally is kidnapped. They chase them right to the big lair where the king lives. Sally is frozen solid now. The Titanians have been listening to Earth radio broadcasts for years and waiting for them to arrive so that they can capture a space vessel, travel back to Earth, and steal all the oxygen. John kills the king with a perfect shot between the eyes and they rescue Sally. Our boys make it back to the plane and rig up a ridiculous way to get the plane to work again (there's lots of frozen oxygen in the king's lair.) They try to get back to earth but John miscalculates because empirical/metric (lol) which sends them to a totally different solar system and planet. Sally is still frozen solid in the back of the plane. We fall toward the planet and realize a war is going on. One of the two sides looks more similar to humans than the other, so the earthmen decide to help out the humanoids by chucking all the seats out of the plane onto the enemy. We meet these humanoids and they also have listened to Earth radio broadcasts for many years and know perfect Russian and English. We hear the sob story of the 10,000 year war that has been going on and decide to help out. Sally is still frozen solid. <cite>turbopuns2 posted [p:897761820] in join me as... [t:76412697]...</cite> <quote>Alright so lovable Old John (real name Johann) interrupts the boys' attempt to test their invention on the football team's airplane by pulling a gun, forcing them each into separate bathrooms, and then welding the doors shut. But of course one of our heroes just makes a bomb using soap and plastic and easily frees all of them. They attempt to take back the cockpit and trigger their invention to transport them to a specific place which won't leave the plane with enough fuel to "fly to Russia or Siberia or Cuba". buuuut a miscalculation is made and we end up on Titan. Or just above it anyway. But no worries, perfect landing. Also while they are landing and the spy Johann is tied up, they literally convince him to desert and be on the American side in like 5 seconds. And he's immediately all fired up and ready to vote in elections and eat hot dogs at baseball games. (not making up examples here. he says these things.) Titan has life forms on it with "tentacles, hideous beaks, and four bulging eyes". And they start attacking the plane. Despite Titan being -200 degrees, the guys put on football uniforms, pads, and helmets, and go out onto its surface armed with the gun, the welding torch, and an emergency axe. Oh and they strap the emergency oxygen tanks onto their waists. This is like ghostbusters shit. Oh and pert Sally sews gloves out of cheerleader uniforms to keep their hands warm. wow. They slaughter so many Titanians that it forms a "forty-foot high mountain of corpses". They win the fight but Sally is kidnapped. They chase them right to the big lair where the king lives. Sally is frozen solid now. The Titanians have been listening to Earth radio broadcasts for years and waiting for them to arrive so that they can capture a space vessel, travel back to Earth, and steal all the oxygen. John kills the king with a perfect shot between the eyes and they rescue Sally. Our boys make it back to the plane and rig up a ridiculous way to get the plane to work again (there's lots of frozen oxygen in the king's lair.) They try to get back to earth but John miscalculates because empirical/metric (lol) which sends them to a totally different solar system and planet. Sally is still frozen solid in the back of the plane. We fall toward the planet and realize a war is going on. One of the two sides looks more similar to humans than the other, so the earthmen decide to help out the humanoids by chucking all the seats out of the plane onto the enemy. We meet these humanoids and they also have listened to Earth radio broadcasts for many years and know perfect Russian and English. We hear the sob story of the 10,000 year war that has been going on and decide to help out. Sally is still frozen solid.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Topic List	Page List: 1