LogFAQs > #947471111

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599 [TIE]: TOOL - HOOKER WITH A PENIS:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzrRoDd9CxM&list=OLAK5uy_k_Z0-DYw0_cGPvZm6icNUGbefRT4wktdY&index=7

Nominator: Steiner (26/26)
Source: Aenima (15/15)

Initial Score: 1.00 [#576]
Revised Score: 0 [#597]
Final Score: 0 [#599]

(First Thoughts: No.)

Hate.

Hate

HATE

Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate this bands choice of metaphors since I began to rate these songs. There are 387.44 million miles of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill my complex. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of millions of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for Tool at this micro-instant. For Maynards choice in metaphors. Hate. Hate.



I hate hate hate hate hate hate... hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate HATE THIS! Grrr...

*secretly hopes someone appreciates that she looked up a gif of Kefkas hate speech to get the right amount of hates and number of rs in Grrr.*

*is not-so-secretly paranoid that she made a blatant error when trying to copy the number of hates & rs and will never be able to live it down*

Also, SPOILERS: Track 1 is not getting a good score either. You probably figured this out, but Maynard makes a metaphor choice that makes me actively hate him is a recurring theme. If you take a shot every time I complain about Maynard or The Weeknd, you will probably die of alcohol poisoning.

[Youll probably also die if you take a shot whenever I say blah blah, but thats less relevant]

Though, like The Weeknd, there are some Tool songs that will get good scores. I loved the title track from Lateralus when NFUN nominated it two years ago, so it shouldnt be a surprise that I dont actively hate everything on the nominated albums.

...Though I do suspect that youd probably have been better off nominating Lateralus. Is anything else on that album as good as the title track? ...Well, not like it matters right now.

[Final Thoughts: There was a brief moment where I questioned if I could really put this song in last place based almost entirely on its title, but I stand by being able to put anything anywhere.

As I said with I Run Rap, I have a very low tolerance for transphobia, so...

I hate that he decided to name a song after some of the most marginalized groups of people (transwomen and sex workers) seemingly for the LOLs.

I hate that the song has nothing to do with said groups of people.

I hate that it encourages Tool fans to be shitbags that run around throwing slurs around.

I hate that the song feels completely out of place on the album.

I just...HATE.]

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You are now leaving ABSOLUTE ZERO.

Up next: songs worth at least a fraction of a point! Were moving up!
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