>smash Jägermeister bottle in half and strike a cool pose, ready to fend off the zombies
You smash the Bottle of Jägermeister on the hand railing along the side of the stairs, spilling the remaining liquid. These zombies don't even know what they're getting into. Since you haven't remembered how skilled you are at any kind of combat yet, neither do you for that matter, but they don't know that.
You brandish the jagged remains of the bottle like a sword, holding it before you as a warning to anyone foolish enough to try taking you on, while you instinctively adjust your left hand into a properly-balanced fighting stance.
The zombies emit something between a moan and a growl, much more impressed by you taking a swig of Jäger than by your fighting stance. They charge up the steps at you, moving much more quickly than conventional horror movies and video games would lead you to believe they are capable.
--
"But...her voice when she's in pain is pretty adorable, you know?"
-Saya, Saya no Uta