OPTIONS (part two):
Selling aborted fetuses in "Kenny Dies"
Singing "Heat of the Moment" with Congress in "Kenny Dies"
Going onto the Maury Povich Show in "Freak Strike"
Creating a "SeaCiety" in "The Simpsons Already Did It"
Interrupting Tweek while he's in his happy place in "Free Hat"
Drinking Kenny's ashes in "A Ladder to Heaven"
Making a business out of spreading feces on walls in "My Future Self 'n' Me"
Attacking Kyle with a wiffle-ball bat in "Toilet Paper"
Jennifer Lopez and Mitch Conner coming to life in "Fat Butt and Pancake Head"
Leading an army inspired by "The Passion of the Christ"
Nominating a turd sandwich to become the school's new mascot in "Douche and Turd"
Sabotaging plans to destroy Wal-Mart in "Something Wall Mart This Way Comes"
Killing Kyle with AIDS at the end of his story in "Woodland Critter Christmas"
Having a "wardrobe malfunction" when he thought he was invisible in "Good Times With Weapons"
Ridding South Park of hippies in "Die Hippie, Die"
Fighting to inherit Kenny's PSP by claiming they were BFFs in "Best Friends Forever"
Eating all of the skin off of the fried chicken and leaving immediately afterward in "The Death of Eric Cartman"
Atoning for all of his bad deeds with fruit baskets in "The Death of Eric Cartman"
Robbing Kyle of his Jew Gold in "Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow"
Leading a Ginger-army after becoming a Ginger in "Ginger Kids"
Crapping out of his mouth after putting food up his ass in "Red Hot Catholic Love"
Coaching Jimmy through his date in "Erection Day"
Trying to sneak into Bebe's Stupid Spoiled Whore party in "Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset"
Trying to have a flashback to 1776 instead of studying in "I'm a Little Bit Country"
Scheming a free trip to Casa Bonita in "Casa Bonita"
Replying it was 'totally' worth it when the cops caught him at Casa Bonita in "Casa Bonita"
Playing a robot to trick Butters in "AWESOM-O"
Teaching Stan how to whine to his mom in "Preschool"
Becoming a psychic in "Cartman's Incredible Gift"
Leading "Faith Plus One" in "Christian Rock Hard"
Taking a picture of himself with Butters's wang in his mouth in "Cartman Sucks"
Analyzing people for lice in "Lice Capades"
Saving Kyle in "Smug Alert"
Fighting Kyle in "Cartoon Wars Part II"
Manipulating Fox to pull an episode of Family Guy in "Cartoon Wars Part II"
Eating and s***ting fake treasure in "ManBearPig"
S***ting on Ms. Cartman in "Make Love, Not Warcraft"
Blaming Kyle for 9/11 in "Mystery of the Urinal Deuce"
Becoming the Dawg in "Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy"
Freezing himself to make the Wii come sooner in "Go God Go"
Calling himself from the future in "Go God Go XII"
Fighting the midget in "With Apologies to Jesse Jackson"
Having Mexicans write their essays in "D-Yikes!"
Jumping homeless people in "Night of the Living Homeless"
Giving himself Tourette's Syndrome in "Le Petit Tourette"
Winning his bet against Kyle about leprechauns in "Imaginationland"
Scheming to get the girls' list of how hot the boys are in "The List"
Giving Kyle AIDS in "Tonsil Trouble"
Saving cats in "Major Boobage"
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Nominate E P O N A.