LogFAQs > #930230378

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Topic	My manager keeps misgendering one of my coworkers
joe40001 11/16/19 4:21:54 PM #137:	shockthemonkey posted... joe40001 posted... shockthemonkey posted... joe40001 posted... Sir Will posted... joe40001 posted... Hmm. So obviously people/bosses should be kind and respectful to their employees. Though I could see the argument being made that "if somebody doesn't believe people can actually change their gender, should they be legally forced to change their mind on it?" If the boss just was honest and said "look, I personally don't think you are actually a male and that's why I say 'she'" would that make them an evil bigot? Kinda. Especially if, yeah, one is still being a dick and using the wrong pronouns. Also, requiring people to use the proper pronoun would not be 'forcing them to change their mind on it'. Let's push the hypothetical to extremes. Let's say somebody prefers to be addressed as Doctor, even though they aren't a doctor and never got a PhD. Are you being a dick if you refuse to do that? This is such a stupid comparison. Stop trying to find excuses to misgender people. It's a hypothetical, not a direct comparison. You can answer the hypothetical or explain why it's stupid. Simply calling it stupid doesn't really contribute anything though. Your hypothetical doesnt contribute anything. Stop trying to find excuses to misgender people. You are projecting that. The issue is there is somebody chronically misgendering somebody and it seems to be causing that person distress so I want to break apart the certain elements, there seem to be 2 elements involved in my estimation: 1. A person not believing just because you identify as a gender you are that gender. (This is not being discussed in the hypothetical) 2. The question of if a person is a dick if they refuse to say something they believe to be untrue, if not saying it distresses somebody. For us to have a full discussion we have to tease apart both of those questions, so that's what this question is meant to address, element 2, and it addresses it in a scenario where nobody would disagree that the non-doctor is a doctor. Once we have agreement on question 2 we can also discuss question 1. But just going "this is stupid you want to hate trans people" is not productive. I personally want to have a discussion about the topic at hand and how people perceive it, and so that involves breaking down and discussing it's elements. --- "joe is attractive and quite the brilliant poster" - Seiichi Omori https://imgur.com/TheGsZ9 <cite>joe40001 posted [p:930230378] in My manager... [t:78162637]...</cite> <quote>shockthemonkey posted...</cite> <quote>joe40001 posted...</cite> <quote>shockthemonkey posted...</cite> <quote>joe40001 posted...</cite> <quote>Sir Will posted...</cite> <quote>joe40001 posted...</cite> <quote>Hmm. So obviously people/bosses should be kind and respectful to their employees. Though I could see the argument being made that "if somebody doesn't believe people can actually change their gender, should they be legally forced to change their mind on it?" If the boss just was honest and said "look, I personally don't think you are actually a male and that's why I say 'she'" would that make them an evil bigot?</quote> Kinda. Especially if, yeah, one is still being a dick and using the wrong pronouns. Also, requiring people to use the proper pronoun would not be 'forcing them to change their mind on it'.</quote> Let's push the hypothetical to extremes. Let's say somebody prefers to be addressed as Doctor, even though they aren't a doctor and never got a PhD. Are you being a dick if you refuse to do that?</quote> This is such a stupid comparison. Stop trying to find excuses to misgender people.</quote> It's a hypothetical, not a direct comparison. You can answer the hypothetical or explain why it's stupid. Simply calling it stupid doesn't really contribute anything though.</quote> Your hypothetical doesnt contribute anything. Stop trying to find excuses to misgender people.</quote> You are projecting that. The issue is there is somebody chronically misgendering somebody and it seems to be causing that person distress so I want to break apart the certain elements, there seem to be 2 elements involved in my estimation: 1. A person not believing just because you identify as a gender you are that gender. (This is not being discussed in the hypothetical) 2. The question of if a person is a dick if they refuse to say something they believe to be untrue, if not saying it distresses somebody. For us to have a full discussion we have to tease apart both of those questions, so that's what this question is meant to address, element 2, and it addresses it in a scenario where nobody would disagree that the non-doctor is a doctor. Once we have agreement on question 2 we can also discuss question 1. But just going "this is stupid you want to hate trans people" is not productive. I personally want to have a discussion about the topic at hand and how people perceive it, and so that involves breaking down and discussing it's elements. --- "joe is attractive and quite the brilliant poster" - Seiichi Omori https://imgur.com/TheGsZ9</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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