LogFAQs > #971234020

Jeff_AKA_Snoopy posted...

I am this odd mixture of devastated but also happy my wife will not need to live in constant pain? I'm not sure how you even START doing all this as the one who will be left. I have a wonderful family and support structure around me. I WILL be fine... but I'm not always fine right now even though it isn't an assured thing yet.

Why make the topic? I dunno, help me work out my own shit about it? Maybe talk with some people who have gone through similar shit? I dunno.

That bit hit hard for me. My mom always had MS, she was diagnosed with it when I was 5. She had the progressive kind. I always knew she wouldn't get old. In the end she was literally trapped in her own body. So to see you say that you are both devastated and relieved is something I understand very well. You are devastated over the loss of your loved one, but at the same tome your are relieved for them that it is finally over.

And how hard it may be to admit, because it still is for me: after my mom died I felt lighter, like a weight was off my shoulders. Not having to worry about her anymore.

And it is okay to have these thoughts. It is never simple.