Poll of the Day > How close do people have to be in age for someone to date a minor and not be

(+) Yeah! (+)

creepy?

Like 16 and 18 ok for you? 17 and 18, or if one is a minor, is it always creepy?

Secondary question:
I used to be friends with this dude in high school and college, and he was like 3 or 4 years older than one of his friend's little sisters. Apparently he fell in love with her at first sight, but she was underage, so he didn't do anything, but as soon as she turned 18, he got with her. No idea if he groomed her, or if she was interested in him too.(I asked if he was going to get with her when she turned 18, and he told me no, only to get with her as soon as she turned 18, so I wonder what made him change his mind)

So what about about that situation? You think what he did was creepy too, or is it only creepy if he groomed her?
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Why the fuck does this same topic pop up every damn week in slightly different variations its fucking gross and way too many grown ass men are spending way too much time pondering this skeevy shit

Mead out

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SaltyAndSweet posted...

Why the fuck does this same topic pop up every damn week in slightly different variations its fucking gross and way too many grown ass men are spending way too much time pondering this skeevy shit

Mead out

I haven't seen those topics. I only created this because I remembered the dude that I used to be friends with back then. Plus, I'm way too old to even be close to an underage girl's age.
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SaltyAndSweet posted...

Why the fuck does this same topic pop up every damn week in slightly different variations its fucking gross and way too many grown ass men are spending way too much time pondering this skeevy shit

Mead out

agreed if youre an adult over the age of 19 this shouldnt even be something you need to think about

Both of the ones you mentioned are fine. As for your friend, maybe when you asked him, he changed his mind. Or he possibly always was, but didnt want to say it because it sounded creepy. But I think its only creepy if he groomed her. Its also possible she had a crush on him. I know many people where a younger sibling of two friends liked the older one. On a friends liking another friends older sibling. I dont see them getting together many times. But I do see when they have crushes and stuff, so...
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It's probably a case-by-case basis. If it's two people who know each other well, there's a lot more latitude whereas if they're strangers beforehand where even a 20 y/o with a 17 y/o can seem like a creep. The older one being 18 is really a gray area because that's just over the line, which is why most states have laws specific to that. (Especially because many times a couple can already be dating then the older of the two partners turns 18.)

More generally, the major/minor system is largely arbitrary and poorly designed, so... grain of salt there. Development isn't uniform and peoples' brains are still developing up until their mid-20s. However, no matter the stupidity of things like that, the law is still the law, so the only time you should be dating a minor is if you're a minor.

lihlih posted...

I used to be friends with this dude in high school and college, and he was like 3 or 4 years older than one of his friend's little sisters. Apparently he fell in love with her at first sight, but she was underage, so he didn't do anything, but as soon as she turned 18, he got with her. No idea if he groomed her, or if she was interested in him too.(I asked if he was going to get with her when she turned 18, and he told me no, only to get with her as soon as she turned 18, so I wonder what made him change his mind)

How long of that was he older than 18, though?

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Zeus posted...

It's probably a case-by-case basis. If it's two people who know each other well, there's a lot more latitude whereas if they're strangers beforehand where even a 20 y/o with a 17 y/o can seem like a creep. The older one being 18 is really a gray area because that's just over the line, which is why most states have laws specific to that.

More generally, the major/minor system is largely arbitrary and poorly designed, so... grain of salt there. Development isn't uniform and peoples' brains are still developing up until their mid-20s. However, no matter the stupidity of things like that, the law is still the law, so the only time you should be dating a minor is if you're a minor.

How long of that was he older than 18, though?

I think she was either 15 or 16 when they first met.
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But how old was he at the time? Just 18?

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Zeus posted...

But how old was he at the time? Just 18?

Something like that, like I've said in the OP, he was about 3-4 years older than her. This like over 10 years ago, sonI can't remember the specific numbers.
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I've seen this brought up quite often during all those claims involving the fighting game community.

Do Romeo and Juliet clauses not exist anymore, or were they just something I heard about when younger that aren't actually true? Something like if you're within 3-4 years of each other it's all good? I can't recall if this just involved dating and not a sexual relationship.

I never see anyone bring it up anymore.

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supergamer19 posted...

Do Romeo and Juliet clauses not exist anymore, or were they just something I heard about when younger that aren't actually true? Something like if you're within 3-4 years of each other it's all good? I can't recall if this just involved dating and not a sexual relationship.

The laws itself does exist... Though, I think it might also go by another name. But that's commonly what people call it. And I think the law does cover sexual acts in the relationship. I can't remember the maximum age gap. But it's probably either 3 or 4 years...

While we talk about it on the site, I can understand why it may not be brought up in real life as often...
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My first sentence made me sound like a creep lol

I meant I've seen, more often these days, the discussion of how close in age can an adult date a minor.

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supergamer19 posted...

I've seen this brought up quite often during all those claims involving the fighting game community.

Do Romeo and Juliet clauses not exist anymore, or were they just something I heard about when younger that aren't actually true? Something like if you're within 3-4 years of each other it's all good? I can't recall if this just involved dating and not a sexual relationship.

I never see anyone bring it up anymore.

Those laws vary state by state (including the age ranges) -- when they exist at all -- and sometimes have restrictive clauses.

supergamer19 posted...

I never see anyone bring it up anymore.

I referenced them in my first post, albeit not by concept name.

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